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Joined: Sep 2005
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well, I guess the cops will be raiding the kids baseball games then.

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Hang in there, because chances are good that your ex and her affair partner will split up. Then she may be more reasonable about visitation.

In the meantime, do your best to love and comfort your kids.

Your wife is a fool.

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Hang in there, because chances are good that your ex and her affair partner will split up. Then she may be more reasonable about visitation.

In the meantime, do your best to love and comfort your kids.

Your wife is a fool.


yep.

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There is some judgement involved in recordings.

Recording kids at a baseball game is different. The intent is not to record individual conversations so much as a public event. Now, if you turned around in the crowd and started recording the conversation between a husband and wife (or whomever) and they turned to you and told you to quit taping them, then that may be a violation. Then again, they're speaking in a public place and you didn't start recording with the intent of recording them.

He's close enough on the sidewalk to record the conversation between my ex and I as we prep the kids to leave. My kids, myself, and my ex are the subject of his recording and he doesn't have MY consent to do this.

There's interpretation involved in the law, but sound recording is strictly enforced here.


D-Day 28 Feb 06
Plan D (Not by choice) - 24 March 06

DD6
DS4(Twin1)
DS4(Twin2)

She moved away with the kids April 08. I contested it and got a lot more time with my kids. She's unhappy that I want to stay involved in their lives and don't settle for being an "every other weekend" dad.

Never going to happen.

Ongoing personal recovery through the help of friends, family, and DC United Soccer!
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And MEDC is right. The guy is a big jerk. I can't even imagine a man acting like that with another man's family.

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D-Day 28 Feb 06
Plan D (Not by choice) - 24 March 06

DD6
DS4(Twin1)
DS4(Twin2)

She moved away with the kids April 08. I contested it and got a lot more time with my kids. She's unhappy that I want to stay involved in their lives and don't settle for being an "every other weekend" dad.

Never going to happen.

Ongoing personal recovery through the help of friends, family, and DC United Soccer!
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Posts: 27,069
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Oh, good that at least the jerk is not an affair partner. He's just a jerk.

How long has she known him?

Your best bet is to not be the focus of his attention. Just be a good dad to your kids as much as you can.

Statistically your wife and his relationship is doomed.

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I've had a very rough week emotionally. I really miss my kids and I feel very alone. I'm approaching the 2 year anniversary of my D. I've been making great progress, but I'm very down and have been down the last week.

I'm very alone because, using MB principles, I let go of my GF, who I thought things were going great with, but she had an ex BF show up.

She then started "getting confused" and "I don't know what I want".

I told her it was unfortunate that she feels this way. I felt there was a lot of good promise for us.

So we cut things off. She kept contacting me, however. She flirted with me through emails and even called me at one point.

Using what I've learned here, I told her that she and I couldn't have a chance if she was in contact with her ex BF and that he would always confuse her.

I told her that I really liked her, but couldn't be with her if she was confused and that I didn't want to be either a rebound or to get in competition with another man.

I told her my door was open to her once she figures things out, but that I didn't want to hear from her until she figured whatever that is out.

A lesson learned on MB about boundaries. People can only treat you as bad as you let them.

That incident got my week started. The rest of the week was just rough and I felt very alone. I've been on MB a lot and have gotten caught up on many BH threads, advising them to not be me.

I just read an article on Sudden Divorce Syndrome. Men like me who are caught off guard and unaware of their wives desire to leave.

They are left alienated from the kids and in financial ruin, supporting an ex wife and kids they hardly see.

I'm there and would be bankrupt without my parent's help. I miss the kids a lot.

I look forward to Sunday. I'm having a Super Bowl get together and am going to surprise my buddy with a cake and wish him a happy birthday, which is just 2 days later.

I hope you all have a good weekend.


D-Day 28 Feb 06
Plan D (Not by choice) - 24 March 06

DD6
DS4(Twin1)
DS4(Twin2)

She moved away with the kids April 08. I contested it and got a lot more time with my kids. She's unhappy that I want to stay involved in their lives and don't settle for being an "every other weekend" dad.

Never going to happen.

Ongoing personal recovery through the help of friends, family, and DC United Soccer!
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Posts: 27,069
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Sounds like you are catching on! It is good to have strong boundaries. Then at least people know where you stand. GF may be back, and then she will realize that she can't have an ex in the picture.

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D-Day 28 Feb 06
Plan D (Not by choice) - 24 March 06

DD6
DS4(Twin1)
DS4(Twin2)

She moved away with the kids April 08. I contested it and got a lot more time with my kids. She's unhappy that I want to stay involved in their lives and don't settle for being an "every other weekend" dad.

Never going to happen.

Ongoing personal recovery through the help of friends, family, and DC United Soccer!
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I'd say your reaction was very appropriate. Nicely played.

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D-Day 28 Feb 06
Plan D (Not by choice) - 24 March 06

DD6
DS4(Twin1)
DS4(Twin2)

She moved away with the kids April 08. I contested it and got a lot more time with my kids. She's unhappy that I want to stay involved in their lives and don't settle for being an "every other weekend" dad.

Never going to happen.

Ongoing personal recovery through the help of friends, family, and DC United Soccer!
Joined: Sep 2005
Posts: 10,044
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I am not surprised that your ex is engaged two years after the divorce...that in and of itself is fine in my eyes...it's everything else that she has done that is so sad and shocking.

I would doubt VERY highly that she will be permitted to leave with the kids. States are not likely to allow a parent to leave their jurisdiction.

You are doing a great job fighting this and from a dad that has full custody of his son...I can tell you that your kids will be proud of their father. Their mother...well, that's another story.

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pomdbd3 Offline OP
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They are the center of my life and the entire reason I'm here instead of California.

All my family is out there.

I swear that I could be given sole physical and legal custody tomorrow and I'd still want my kids to see their mother regularly. I think it's bad for them to not have BOTH parents involved in their lives.

But her moves explain why she resisted my request to enroll our kids in after school activities.

No spring soccer for our daughter. No participation in Spanish classes, etc.


D-Day 28 Feb 06
Plan D (Not by choice) - 24 March 06

DD6
DS4(Twin1)
DS4(Twin2)

She moved away with the kids April 08. I contested it and got a lot more time with my kids. She's unhappy that I want to stay involved in their lives and don't settle for being an "every other weekend" dad.

Never going to happen.

Ongoing personal recovery through the help of friends, family, and DC United Soccer!
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