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I know it won't happen overnight. I have not written an NC letter yet. They are no longer friends and there has been no contact with the OP from either I or him.
I gave him access to everything and have been completly honest about it all. My fiance is the one who actually told me about this site..he has posted a few things already and this site is really helping both of us.

How long has it been since NC? That's great that you're both posting here. MB is a God-send for most people. You made a huge mistake but if you stick with it, you guys can overcome this and have a marriage built on a strong foundation. But ONLY if you buckle down and learn and implement the tenants here, you can't go wrong.

But please... if you have any inkling of doubt about marrying your fiance, please do him a favor and end it now. Don't put him through this again 10 years down the road. That would be heartless and cruel.

Widowed 11/10/12 after 35 years of marriage
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“In a sense now, I am homeless. For the home, the place of refuge, solitude, love-where my husband lived-no longer exists.” Joyce Carolyn Oates, A Widow's Story