Please listen to Snuggle, Dino...

You want more than a shred to leave with, then stop draining your own love bank with the LBs in your head.

One important step is to stop focusing on outcome. When you focus on outcome and not your actions, you do lose abandon and harm yourself. Stop. Now.

You aren't in two different were right there, same space, place and time. Well, you weren't. Being present with your whole being, shepherding your own thoughts, that's where you're doubling your pain. You are giving yourself this you're self-punishing in some way is how I see it.

If you'll punish yourself, you'll punish her...please stop.

Right here, right now...revoke your permissions to go into the future or the past. Pain time is really slow...moves like "Slow glass" (you can distract and look up that marvelous short story on the internet). Being present cuts the pain time slowness in half. It's where we all live...unless we choose differently. Then we're in fantasy.

I think you've had enough fantasy intrude into your life...and what you post here would be GREAT to make into simple statements to your WW. "Here's what I discovered I do in my head and I'm working on it."

"Here's my fear that I won't have a shred of love for you left because I experience you as if you're in another dimension."

Take your eyes off outcome--no human can live from it, divine from it or choose well from it. Not in our control. Focus on your code, your stuff and live now, Dino.

It was reading MB which helped me realign time after time in doing old much of my life was spent spiraling downward because of my choice to focus on outcome...way too much. You don't deserve this great harm you are doing to yourself--nor does your family, your life.

Our focus on our situations can take over the situation, distort and lock us in. Free yourself. Who you are right now is sufficient unto this was never sufficient to take the past into now nor equipped to experience the future as now. Reality only holds this moment. You know that. I'm reminding.