Any MB veterans have any ideas about how to work on eliminating LBs and fulfilling ENs while the spouse is deployed? I was kind of surprised that I did not see any info about this in the Military Marriages room. smile

Love Busters
1. Selfish Demands
2. Disrespectful Judgments
3. Angry Outbursts
4. Annoying Habits
5. Independent Behavior
6. Dishonesty


Emotional Needs
1. Affection
2. Sexual Fulfillment
3. Conversation
4. Recreational Companionship
5. Honesty and Openness
6. Physical Attractiveness
7. Financial Support
8. Domestic Support
9. Family Commitment
10. Admiration


This is tough. Most of these require some sort of physical presence. Even in the case of a couple who is separated (living separately because they are prepping for a divorce), one can easily pick up the phone or mail things..maybe stop by to visit if invited, etc. Not the case with a deployed spouse.

I can see where during telephone conversations (if you are lucky enough to have them) you can avoid LB 1, 2, 3, and 5 or give EN 1, 5, 7, 9, and 10...but with a Deployment & the need for the household (and you!) to keep going, IBing is almosta must while AHs are virtually a non-issue and SF is on hold.

When the deployment ends and your spouse returns, your spouse may go into IB mode to cope. Your spouse may even have PTSD making him / her withdraw emotionally from you.

How do MB prinicple address these issues which are unique to military couples?


Last edited by ChrisInNOVA; 03/13/10 06:26 PM.