Hey HOLD, go easy on yourself, I am mad at her too! Look at the number she did on your life. If you were more confident you would have dumped her and got the marriage annuled before she had the children.

Face it, she stole from you ...your money...and your life.

I am glad she is getting thinner and is less miserable a person. At least she will be easier to live with. But your wounds run very deep and it will take a lot of scarring over (her not abusing you) and then the scars healing.

You should be feeling better about her in about three or four years.

What would speed up that healing, is if the "woman" came to you and told you she felt bad for stealing and blowing all the family nest egg you saved up....and that she was really sorry and was going to work full time for as long as it would take to pay that back!!!

HOLD< clearly she is NOT REALLY SORRY for all the money she stole, spent and lied about and SHE IS NOT REALLY SORRY for hurting you, abusing you and all but ruining or quelching (or destroying) your sex abilities, your sex drive, and your sexuality.

She should literally BE IN PRISON for doing those things to you and she did them for YEARS to you. Who could like her after all that? Losing 50 lbs is not going to help the resentment you stuffed for 15 years and became depressed over.

What may help is for you to slowly bring up that stuff to her. As you did that sexual rejection issue ...you did real good there!

If she is any kind of changed human being at all (from the efforts of eating healthy and working out) then she will respond.

I can guarantee it if you do bring up these things and she does respond in a way that proves how remorseful she is and if she makes amends in a way that is hard for her to do....

Then, you will feel a lot better not having that burdon between you causing resentment.

I look at her as a common criminal who ruins everyone's life around her and then...laughing and smiling..... skates free from prison not having to do any hard or easy time and not having to atone for what she did or make up for it or "pay the money back".

What kind of woman does this? She should be working her butt off paying that money back to show you she is remorseful and that she cares about you. Instead, she takes the easy way and keeps on using you again and again.

I really dislike human beings like that.