Originally Posted by jmwc95
Just to be clear, plan A your W, plan B your WW.
That is not the way that Dr Harley describes Plans A and B.

Plan A is for the WW.

Plan B is for the WW.

You must be wholly in either one plan or the other.

Until the affair ends, the WW is a WW. At no time is she a W. You cannot Plan A her when she is being nice this morning and Plan B her when she is foggy or spiteful this afternoon. Plan A has both carrot and stick elements, and is the only plan to use while the BS is able to use it. There is no Plan B during Plan A.

When Plan A becomes a way of life for the WS (when they settle down happily to having their needs met by two people), or when the BS is unable to continue being a giver while the affair continues, Plan B comes into force. Plan B is complete cessation of contact until the affair ends, and you cannot move between it and Plan A.


BW
Married 1989
His PA 2003-2006
2 kids.