Hi Ruthlesstoothless - Welcome to the MB website and forum!

I'm assuming that your H is still in the military, and that he is still "deployable" at anytime...

Have you and your H discussed ways that you can both protect your M if/when he deploys again? If not, this would be a great subject to bring up with a trusted Chaplain, or a pro-marriage MC.

What has your H done to help you work through pain of HIS affair? You mentioned MC and IC... what did you both learn?

If your H is still deployable, and you haven't discussed ways for each of you to protect your M when he deploys, then I can see where you would still have trouble with the pain of his last A, even though it was 5 years ago.

Have you both read the basic concepts here on the MB website? Have you read Surviving An Affair? If not, I'd highly recommend reading it together and studying the concepts for protecting your M.

The military section doesn't get much traffic, so you might want to move you thread to the "Surviving an Affair" forum since it gets more traffic.

Again, welcome!

Semper Fi,


Me, BS

Her, Forgiven

Married Dec 86

Multiple A's that ended '90

Rebuilding In Faith since then...

Currently deployed to Iraq, but TEXAS is Home!