He told me, after the interview with this new place, that they encourage spouse participation at events and spouses are always invited, and that all training was local.

he never discussed with them during the interview phase that overnight travel or spouse-excluding events would be reasons why he would not be able to accept the job if offered. He asked a couple of questions about it and INFERRED

Sorry, but this is a lie. Plain and simple. He stated two things: spouses are encouraged to participate and training was local. He stated these two things as facts, when he knew they weren't. He had no authority to back up his assertions. He didn't bother to ask the interviewer specifically. Why? Because it wasn't that important to him. He did a little sniffing around, but didn't specifically ask.

Honesty would be "I believe from what other employees said that spouses are included at events, and there was no mention made of travel for training."

Instead he said "Spouses are welcome to events and there is no travel involved."

He couldn't know that, he couldn't state it certainly, yet he did - to get CWMIs approval.

The issue isn't that he has a party to go to and some travelling to do and you know that Bubbles. The issue is that he doesn't care about what is important to CWMI, he makes minor efforts to get her off his back and proceed to do what makes him happy. THIS isn't the issue that causes the thoughts of divorce, this is the proverbial straw breaking this marriage's back.

She readily admits that this marriage has many problems. I'm sure CWMI will admit to some blame, but by no means is her husband innocent.

Knowing your spouse's feelings and values, purposefully obfuscating and exaggerating the truth to get your way at the expense of those values and feelings is Independent Behavior. It is at the heart of these issues, and there is little CWMI can do to curb that but remove herself from it.

Me & DH: 28
Married 8/20/05
1DD, 9 mo.
Just Lookin' and Learnin'