Originally Posted by Bubbles4U
This sounds reasonable. Why not go with him? It meets your requirements.

Except that you have decided YOU DONT WANT TO GO.

Our last 'date night'--last Thursday--was spent babysitting a car for the business. I wouldn't be so opposed if was less often and had more 'just us' in between. I do not want to set up a lifestyle where 'our time' is spent on HIS JOB. I don't think that is unreasonable, to want weeks--or months--instead of days between 'events' for his job.

I think to ask your spouse to spend their recreational time with you doing extra stuff for work, is unreasonable. Occasionally, sure, I asked for that, I do want to be included in his work and seen as an asset. I do NOT want it to dictate our lives.

I'm blown away right now with how his work has consumed our lives for the past few days. I didn't think going last week with him was a big deal until all this other was thrown at me, and that is because I did trust him to not allow this to happen again. He thinks it is wholly better because 99% of the time, I'm invited to be consumed by his job as well.

I don't want to be consumed by his job. I want to live our lives together, doing things we both like. So now I'm really pushing it, eh? I don't want him to do events that I'm not invited to, but I also do not want him doing three outside events in ten days, either--I did NOT sign up for that. I did not agree to have my life dictated by his job. I agreed to the working hours, quarterly events, and no travel.

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
(Oscar Wilde)