Well, CWMI, good luck to you in the future. Divorce is tough...if you do go down this path. I think the hardest part of this is going to be telling the kiddos and watching them cry and then be resentful towards both of you for a long time. At least that's how it's been in my situation when I was divorcing from my exwife and from those I've been around that have been divorced (and we know how high the divorce rate is). My 12 year old is still pretty uspet and vocal about it that her mom and dad couldn't stay married and that was over a decade ago. My 14 year old isn't quite as vocal but still mentions it.

I do think you might get all the honesty from him that you ever wanted when you file. I think when you do, he's going to be angry enough to finally be honest with you and drop the 'list' of complaints that he has about you but is afraid to be honest with you about.

Husband (me) 39
Wife 36
Daughter 21
Daughter 19
Son 14
Daughter 10
Son 8 (autistic)