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Originally Posted by Pepperband
(((((DS8)))))
And his teacher is correct about you and your ability to be a good, but not smothering, mom.
hurray hurray hurray


~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And, on a lighter note ....
Hmmmmmmmm
I think you might be having some >ahem< tension "down there".
There's an "app" for that.
If you catch my drift ... rotflmao
Scotty, you and the teacher handled that soooooooo well! I had moments similar with my now DD18 and we were not even separated. She is just an extremely emotional child.


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oh and LOL at Pep!


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Originally Posted by faithful follower
oh and LOL at Pep!
flirt

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Originally Posted by Scotland
Thanx SusieQ(I think you are the one who suggested them and I am too lazy to go find out if it wasn't you).

Yes, it was me smile I am glad you are liking them! Those are HARD books to put down, huh?

Funny story, my SIL read these books almost a year before me and she literally begged me to read them because she desperately wanted to discuss Book 3 with me (I won't say why, don't want to give any spoilers away). So lmk your thoughts when you are done!


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Originally Posted by Scotland
..I say "fantasy" because, when I am truly thinking about it, they would not be a good match for me. None of them are married, but I AM. Not only that, a relationship with them would not be a better life for me. Realistically, if I were looking for a "mate", they would be no where near the top of my list.

You don't need to worry about me, I have my strict boundaries up with these men, as well as other men. I just thought I would put these feelings down, here, so others can know the importance of boundaries and so they don't feel abnormal if they have these same thoughts. I am not in a wayward mindset, but through these "fantasy" thoughts, I can see how it can happen. ...

Thats why I rarely post to you Scotty, you have it together, I don't worry about your strength of character. I follow your thread all the time.

I do think that its healthy that you think about "what it would be like" though, it just means your normal. When that deep and strong love-bank for Bampot becomes totally dry, and your love for your family fits into moving on, you will know it.

God will bless you with your hearts desire. Love those kiddos and give em all hugs for me k?

Scotty Rocks hurray

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SusieQ, I just finished reading Mockingjay. I will say that these books are pretty darn good and I can't believe that I hadn't heard of them until now. Thank you. I probably liked Catching Fire best, but they were all really good. Exactly what I wanted after I finished reading HP. I think I should sleep now, although, I don't know how easy that will be with the books in my mind. grin

CP, thanx for checking up on me.

I was actually getting mad at Bampot tonight because of all of the pain in DS8. It doesn't effect me as much when i am hurt as it does when someone I love is hurting. I will be okay. DSx2 will be okay, we have to be. smile


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I loved Catching Fire but I have to say Mockingjay was my favorite of the three. My gf warned me I was going to hate the ending and guess what? I LOVED the ending. I thought it was perfect. If you read the massive thread on Amazon about those books you will see that I am in the minority, lol.


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Yes, that's true, FF. My SIL was very upset & emotional over Book 3. She sent me a long email of her grievances with it LOL.


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Originally Posted by SusieQ
Yes, that's true, FF. My SIL was very upset & emotional over Book 3. She sent me a long email of her grievances with it LOL.
We read it as part of a book club. One of my closest friends was so upset at the end of Mockingjay that she read the riot act to the two ladies that chose the book. She later apologized saying it was simply an emotional reaction to what she perceived as a lousy ending, lol.


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My word! LOL


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Originally Posted by Scotland
SW, the thing is, in all reality, I still love Bampot. I am not ready to even contemplate a relationship, fantasy or otherwise, with anyone else,right now. I understand that you only want what is best for me, but getting into any type of relationship is not it, ATM. I still need to heal. A man isn't going to heal me. I still have hope and faith. I will know what I need to do, when I am ready.

There has been something nagging me about your situation for days and I just now realized what it is. When I was 10 my mom met another single mom with a 10 yo boy. Her dh had left her for OW 8 years earlier. They were legally divorced, and he never saw the boy. This friend was still pining away for her 'husband'. She still spoke of him as if he was her husband and was patiently waiting for....??? I don't know. 35 years have passed by. She is still a good close family friend. Her son grew up, she went to work, retired, became a grandmother....but basically NEVER looked at another man. Ever.

I don't want that for you.

I don't think you need to get involved in another relationship ATM. I would just love for you to consider that your WH isn't worth wasting anymore time on and cut him loose so that WHEN you are healed and ready for a relationship you have no legal entanglments with your WH.

I get that you still love him. Sometimes love is not enough.

I hung on to a bad marriage for 26 years. I remarried MUCH quicker than most people would think is wise...but I can't express the extent of my happiness now. I had NO clue I could be this happy in a marriage/relationship. It just keeps getting better and better.

My biggest regret is staying in that bad marriage for as long as I did.

Just my POV. YMMV. (((Scottie)))

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I didn't think it was that horrible of a ending. I just really liked the Catching Fire because there were so many twits and turns that I didn't see coming. Mackingjay was a little more predictable. That is why I liked it a bit less than Catching Fire. They are really good books. Now, some of my friends are going to read them too. Thanx


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Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

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SW, the thing about me is that a year ago, I would have told you that I AM that woman you mentioned. If I never had a boyfriend again, it wouldn't be the end of the world for me. I am not pining away for Bampot. I am not even "waiting" for him. What I am doing is healing, in my own way, at my own pace.

I am not going to condemn you for the choices you have made, I do know that I would not make that choice, right now.

There has been much discussion on this thread, and in my own thoughts, about what I could have and what I could do. I am looking at it realistically, and for right now, my focus is on my healing and taking care of my kiddos.

Bampot is not worth my time. Bampot is not worth much to me. The man I married, the man he was, and who he could have been is worth it to me, he just doesn't exist anymore. He may never be again.

This process isn't about him. This healing is about ME. I am heading down my path, changing with each step that I take. I am becoming something better. For that I am forever grateful.

Thanx for sticking around with me and for caring enough to want better for me, it is greatly appreciated.


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Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

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Originally Posted by Scotland
This process isn't about him. This healing is about ME. I am heading down my path, changing with each step that I take. I am becoming something better. For that I am forever grateful.

Who loves ya' baby?

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Originally Posted by Scotland
SW, the thing about me is that a year ago, I would have told you that I AM that woman you mentioned. If I never had a boyfriend again, it wouldn't be the end of the world for me. I am not pining away for Bampot. I am not even "waiting" for him. What I am doing is healing, in my own way, at my own pace.

I am not going to condemn you for the choices you have made, I do know that I would not make that choice, right now.

There has been much discussion on this thread, and in my own thoughts, about what I could have and what I could do. I am looking at it realistically, and for right now, my focus is on my healing and taking care of my kiddos.

Bampot is not worth my time. Bampot is not worth much to me. The man I married, the man he was, and who he could have been is worth it to me, he just doesn't exist anymore. He may never be again.

This process isn't about him. This healing is about ME. I am heading down my path, changing with each step that I take. I am becoming something better. For that I am forever grateful.

Thanx for sticking around with me and for caring enough to want better for me, it is greatly appreciated.

I love this post, Scotty. You are one for the record books. smile


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Originally Posted by Pepperband
Who loves ya' baby?

YOU? HEHEHEHE Thanx Pep.

Thanx to you too MrsV, although I never feel like I deserve such praise.

I really have a hard time accepting praise, I think I need to work on that. lashes


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Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

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IMO

From my experience, both praise AND criticism can be handled with a polite "Thank you".


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Originally Posted by Pepperband
IMO

From my experience, both praise AND criticism can be handled with a polite "Thank you".

I like this Pep.

Sorry if I am overstepping Scottie....I just went back and read your first page of this thread...and ya know what? You ARE healing. You have come a long way.

And if you go look at my thread about visitation on the divorced forum you can see the down side of remarriage...

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Originally Posted by Scotland
SW, the thing about me is that a year ago, I would have told you that I AM that woman you mentioned. If I never had a boyfriend again, it wouldn't be the end of the world for me. I am not pining away for Bampot. I am not even "waiting" for him. What I am doing is healing, in my own way, at my own pace.

I am not going to condemn you for the choices you have made, I do know that I would not make that choice, right now.

There has been much discussion on this thread, and in my own thoughts, about what I could have and what I could do. I am looking at it realistically, and for right now, my focus is on my healing and taking care of my kiddos.

Bampot is not worth my time. Bampot is not worth much to me. The man I married, the man he was, and who he could have been is worth it to me, he just doesn't exist anymore. He may never be again.

This process isn't about him. This healing is about ME. I am heading down my path, changing with each step that I take. I am becoming something better. For that I am forever grateful.

Thanx for sticking around with me and for caring enough to want better for me, it is greatly appreciated.

What a post hurray

Ok Scotty, I can't stand it anymore! will you marry me?.. Lol your awesome sista!

NM you would probably kill me and I have rules about things like that. Big brother==kiss n hug

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Originally Posted by Scotland
SW, the thing about me is that a year ago, I would have told you that I AM that woman you mentioned. If I never had a boyfriend again, it wouldn't be the end of the world for me. I am not pining away for Bampot. I am not even "waiting" for him. What I am doing is healing, in my own way, at my own pace.

I am not going to condemn you for the choices you have made, I do know that I would not make that choice, right now.

There has been much discussion on this thread, and in my own thoughts, about what I could have and what I could do. I am looking at it realistically, and for right now, my focus is on my healing and taking care of my kiddos.

Bampot is not worth my time. Bampot is not worth much to me. The man I married, the man he was, and who he could have been is worth it to me, he just doesn't exist anymore. He may never be again.

This process isn't about him. This healing is about ME. I am heading down my path, changing with each step that I take. I am becoming something better. For that I am forever grateful.

Thanx for sticking around with me and for caring enough to want better for me, it is greatly appreciated.
You are so amazing that now I want to be both you and Pep when I grow up! Of course at this rate, I may NEVER grow up. kiss


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