Originally Posted by Hilltopper1972
Thanks for all the advice. I realize now that I relayed the story from last night and kind of presented it as an attempt at UA. My wife and I are clear that UA time is to be spent alone, there is 100% agreement on that.

Okay, good; glad you had that clear. smile

You may find that as the quality of your conversation increases (and maybe other intimate emotional needs, too) that your wife will find your time together more valuable and this will contribute to her feeling more like it is "worth it" to leave the baby for awhile.

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I'd really like to think that we'll need to just get better at finding people that my wife feels good about and trusts.

That may help and keep brainstorming on that front, but don't limit yourself to just that. A whole host of things can contribute to making circumstances where she feels more enthusiastic:
* making the time more valuable, as I said above
* the baby getting older
* different babysitters
* staying closer?
* shorter intervals at first?
* keep brainstorming; this list likely has even more I'm not seeing


If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.