Originally Posted By: Hilltopper1972
I told my wife I might want to meet with a therapist or SH to help me express myself better and not take rejection so hard.


Hill, I'll save you the money. Let me teach you how to express yourself better:

"How would you feel about ... ?"
"I'd like it if you'd ..."
"It bothers me when you ..."

That plus avoiding demands, disrespect, and anger, is all there is to expressing yourself.

The real problem is that when you express yourself and Grace doesn't respond the way you want, you respond with demands, disrespect, or anger. You don't have a problem expressing yourself; you have a problem wanting to control Grace's response.

Until you learn to graciously accept Grace's response even when it's not the response you wanted, you will be stuck here. Until you learn to graciously accept Grace's response even when it's not the response you want, you are making demands, and you can expect no improvement in your marriage.

Grace is probably not going to be enthusiastic about meeting your needs, long term, until she has seen a track record of you NOT responding with demands, disrespect, or anger when you express yourself and she responds in a way you do not want.


If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 17 years, who is a beautiful angel.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.