Hill, it's easy to blame your attitude on others, but even easier to get in the habit of checking your attitude. Let it be contagious. Like the expression, be the thermostat, not the thermometer. Your kids need that the most when your W is in the dumps. You talk about how it suffocates you, but you're an adult, fully mature and capable of self-soothing. Is that fair to them, to stew them in both you and your wife dumping negativity?

Me 40, OD 18 and YD 13
Married 15 years, Divorced 10/2010