Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 181 of 199 1 2 179 180 181 182 183 198 199
Scotland #2576087 12/17/11 07:28 PM
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 1,428
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 1,428
Thank-you for the update and inspiration Scotland.

I am glad you are able to explain the reasons for your not entering Plan D. I don't feel in any way that you need to justify yourself though. I don't think this is your intention either. You are showing your giver, because reading this will helps other posters in making their own decision.

Reading about your journey, and with this update, I have to think about what Bampot is missing out on. I believe should Bampot ever come crawling back full of remorse, YOU would have the strength, grace and wisdom to give 100% to recovery should you decide to. Bampot would have his work cut out for him to meet your bar for recovery and to become the man worthy of you.

I am glad that regardless of Bampots actions, your life is blessed. Your children, heartbreaking as it is to hear the effect of Bampot's actions on them, are blessed to have you. Too many betrayed spouses (often without MB) do not thrive, and do not become the role model so desperately needed when the wayward crosses to the dark side. You should be proud.

So how is that $300 going to be used?


Me (BW): 35
Married 1999 with no kids, DDay July 2011, OC born September 2012, Divorce final November 2012.

WXH (Gollum) is corrupted by his A, and now forever bound to it.

Plan B has set me free.

"Mourn the man he was. Know the man he is."
Caracal #2576094 12/17/11 08:04 PM
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Quote
So how is that $300 going to be used?

First, we are going to use at least $30 to purchase toys to donate to Salvation Army(I was the recipient of a doll from them when I was a child, which my mother kept, and I now have in my China cabinet as a reminder of the charity and goodwill of others)so they may be passed onto those less fortunate than ourselves. We will be heading out into the wilderness of retail shopping the last Sunday before Christmas, so the boys can choose what to buy.

Then, there are some things that the boys needed, and I wasn't certain I could buy until after Christmas. The money will help ease the burden, and make Christmas that much easier to handle financially. It is a a true blessing. I am grateful for it.


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
Scotland #2576096 12/17/11 08:13 PM
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 1,428
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 1,428
Originally Posted by Scotland
First, we are going to use at least $30 to purchase toys to donate to Salvation Army(I was the recipient of a doll from them when I was a child, which my mother kept, and I now have in my China cabinet as a reminder of the charity and goodwill of others)so they may be passed onto those less fortunate than ourselves. We will be heading out into the wilderness of retail shopping the last Sunday before Christmas, so the boys can choose what to buy.
The true spirit of Christmas, a really lovely gift for the boys and the recipient.

I have been trying to show my nephew a different side to the cosumerism of Christmas, last fortnight we spent a Saturday morning decorating biscuits to give to his dad as a gift. An eye opener for a kid reared on every item being bought from a shop with transformers or ben 10 badges on it.


Me (BW): 35
Married 1999 with no kids, DDay July 2011, OC born September 2012, Divorce final November 2012.

WXH (Gollum) is corrupted by his A, and now forever bound to it.

Plan B has set me free.

"Mourn the man he was. Know the man he is."
Scotland #2576105 12/17/11 08:47 PM
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 12,357
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 12,357
Quote
Tomorrow is the actual day, but with birthday celebrations, shopping, etc, I dunno how much I will be on tomorrow.
Scotland, I remain impressed by you daily.

Last edited by maritalbliss; 12/17/11 08:47 PM.

D-Day 2-10-2009
Fully Recovered and Better Than Ever!
Thank you Marriage Builders!

Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
Ok Scotty rocks, you got me with that story about the salvation army and the doll, dang you foriegners

Grats on the two year mark, and your growth and depth, it's yours and nobody can take it away, ha I'd like to see them try

I understand about not getting into a relationship while you have young children, heck my youngest is 20 and I still want to keep myself available to my children, as I will allways be thier father

They are all independent work and live apart but, daddy still worries about them

Being married more of my 54 years than single, and how things worked out, there is no romance left anyway lol

Rather have friends and a sense of humor anyways,no drama, nothing to prove, and for Gods sake, no more KISA activities

Still miss having a passion though, but just not willing or able to put myself out there, not for a person, and that's just ok with me

One day at a time, and having a good expectation, based in reality

Real is great

Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 10,179
N
Member
Offline
Member
N
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 10,179
Happy birthday, sweetie!

Truly, there's no rush for anything. As long as it's working, why mess with it? Money in, wayward out... smile


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
Neak #2576183 12/18/11 09:21 AM
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 1,956
Likes: 1
L
Member
Offline
Member
L
Joined: Dec 2010
Posts: 1,956
Likes: 1
Scotty, I have never posted to you, but I want to tell you that I read your thread and am awed by your strength and decency. You are thinking very clearly about how to best live your life well for the sake of your boys and your own conscience.

It's marvelous and moving that your church recognizes this.

All I can say is "Wow!" and "Well done."


Married 1980
DDay Nov 2010

Recovered thanks to Marriage Builders
Joined: Oct 2011
Posts: 107
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Oct 2011
Posts: 107
Scotland, your strength, dignity and courage are an inspiration to me, at a time where I really need it.
I wish you and your boys a wonderful Christmas.


Me, BS, 35
J, WS, 33
12 years together, married 2.
No kids, just cats
D-day 06/30/11
In Plan B

"If you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain."
Maryse #2576259 12/18/11 02:02 PM
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,708
R
Member
Offline
Member
R
Joined: May 2009
Posts: 2,708
Happy Birthday!







reading #2576264 12/18/11 02:08 PM
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Originally Posted by reading
Happy Birthday!

Thank you.


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
Neak #2576265 12/18/11 02:09 PM
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Originally Posted by Neak
Happy birthday, sweetie!

Truly, there's no rush for anything. As long as it's working, why mess with it? Money in, wayward out... smile

Thank you


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
reading #2576266 12/18/11 02:11 PM
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 11,650
I
Member
Offline
Member
I
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 11,650
Happy Birthday!!


What would you do if you were not afraid?

"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.

Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Originally Posted by indiegirl
Happy Birthday!!

Thank you.


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
Scotland #2576315 12/18/11 06:20 PM
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 3,686
K
Member
Offline
Member
K
Joined: Jun 2008
Posts: 3,686
Happy birthday smile


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 1,026
M
Member
Offline
Member
M
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 1,026
Happy b day!!!!!!!


Me BW (37)
WH (37)
DD1 6 yrs DD2 2 yr

A man who abandons his wife and children because of his infidelity is no price. I can do better then that, I deserve better then that.

The difficulties and struggles of today are but the price we must pay for the accomplishments and victories of tomorrow

Men must be honest with themselves before they can be honest with others. A man who is not honest with himself presents a hopeless case
MFJ1974 #2576333 12/18/11 07:15 PM
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 592
N
Member
Offline
Member
N
Joined: Mar 2011
Posts: 592
HappyBirthday Scotty!


Aka S2

I know what's next. I filed for D. Original betrayal and two FR's in one year. I'm done.

A sure way to lose happiness, I found, is to want it at the expense of everything else.

New_Path #2576337 12/18/11 07:51 PM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
Happy BDay Scotty HappyBirthday

Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 1,156
V
Member
Offline
Member
V
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 1,156
Happy Birthday Scotty!! Never have posted to you before but wanted to now.

It took me a while (okay, a LONG while..LOL) to read about your "adventure", and you have earned my upmost respect for your strength through all of this. You are obviously one incredible creature of God and I wish you all the happiness you truly deserve. It WILL come your way one day soon.

Someday, someone will hit the jackpot with you as the prize! I truly envy this man.

Happy Bday again, and Happy Holidays as well!



Every man I meet is in some way my superior; and in that I can learn of him.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson


Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Originally Posted by karmasrose
Happy birthday smile

Thank you.


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
MFJ1974 #2576375 12/18/11 11:31 PM
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Originally Posted by MFJ1974
Happy b day!!!!!!!

Thank you


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
Page 181 of 199 1 2 179 180 181 182 183 198 199

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 1,027 guests, and 52 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Mike69, petercgeelan, Zorya, Reyna98, Nofoguy
71,829 Registered Users
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2019, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5