Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 183 of 199 1 2 181 182 183 184 185 198 199
Neak #2590506 01/27/12 08:57 AM
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Ya' know, it never fails. I write an update, and then shortly after(like that day or the next) something happens that I want to tell you guys.

So, last Saturday, it was my DS9's Bday. It was supposed to be Bampot's weekend to have the boys, so I sent a message through my IM, in early December saying that they wouldn't be available. I did this with my birthday too, and received no response, so when I received no response from my IM, I assumed that it was the same as my birthday.

On Friday night, the boys wanted to stay up late watching Robin Hood on Netflix(it's REALLY good, it's the BBC Tv show from 2007). Then, as per DS9's wished, they wanted a sleepover in my room. I said, "Sure." We slept in later than usual.

At pick-up time, Bampot showed up. He began knocking on the door. I told the boys to stay upstairs, in their room, and I stayed in my room. Bampot didn't leave for over an hour. He knocked on the front door. He knocked on the side window. He knocked on the backdoor. He even threw snowballs at the boys' window. The phone is downstairs, but we could hear is ringing, and ringing. He actually drove away twice, but came back.

I didn't know what to do. I just stayed in my room watching TV, while the boys played video games in theirs.

After Bampot left, I came downstairs. He left 3 messages on the answering machine(which I DELETED without listening to), and he had called 26 times(I did count it, although I probably shouldn't have, but I wanted to document it).

A couple of hours later, DS11 and I were downstairs. Bampot called again, and DS11 talked to him. Apparently, Bampot had feared something had happened to the boys, and that's why he called so many times.

I am not certain that the IM passed along the message about the boys being unavailable, or if Bampot was just being stubborn about it. It really isn't much of a concern for me either way. I just thought I would put it here, as a way to keep my thread as up to date as possible.



BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
Scotland #2590517 01/27/12 09:31 AM
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 1,057
G
GJM Offline
Member
Offline
Member
G
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 1,057
Did you contact the IM to find out what happened? Hopefully they did pass the message along. I can only imagine how you must have been feeling while he was knocking, calling and throwing snowballs at the window.


Me: BH 36
Her: WW 34
Kids: D 14, S 12, S 9
DDay 1-6/2009
DDay 2-9/2011
DDay 3-11/2011
Filed for D 10/2011-Papers Served 11/2011
Divorce final May 24, 2012
My Story



GJM #2590520 01/27/12 09:37 AM
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
F
Member
Offline
Member
F
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
It sounds like it didn't phase the boys which is interesting. I hope DS9 had a good birthday.


Faith

me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 10,179
N
Member
Offline
Member
N
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 10,179
Well played! I am just shaking my head at the dingleberry. I mean really, if he was THAT worried he would have been home long ago. MrRollieEyes

Way to go in staying dark. I would've expected nothing less. hug


A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
GJM #2590596 01/27/12 12:58 PM
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Originally Posted by GJM
Did you contact the IM to find out what happened? Hopefully they did pass the message along. I can only imagine how you must have been feeling while he was knocking, calling and throwing snowballs at the window.

I am torn, because I don't want to know if he just chose to be stubborn, I think it is better this way.

There shouldn't be anymore changes for a long while, so I weighed my knowing with not, and decided this was better for my personal recovery. Thanx for making me think about it though. laugh


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
Scotland #2590598 01/27/12 01:00 PM
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
Good girl!

Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Originally Posted by faithful follower
It sounds like it didn't phase the boys which is interesting. I hope DS9 had a good birthday.

They have had my Plan B prep talks for 2 years, they know how to handle Bampot knocking when he isn't supposed to be here.

DS9 had a WONDERFUL birthday, as we did our new tradition of IHOP. He LOVES that place.


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
Scotland #2590663 01/27/12 03:33 PM
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 122
G
Member
Offline
Member
G
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 122
Scotland,

Wow... You are AMAZING! I read through the first 60+ pages of your journey this morning and I am (almost) speechless. By the time you got to your birthday in '09 I had tears rolling down my face. I just wanted to give you a huge hug.

In some ways I don't think I have much right to comment on other people's posts who have clearly had their lives turned upside down by their WS. My heart just went out to you and your boys. I wanted to tell you that, and also that you have my respect and admiration... You have amazing strength!

Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Thank you Goldilocks. Virtual hugs are always welcome.

It's been a long tough journey, and it ain't over yet. laugh

I'm looking forward to whatever else life has in store for me. Whatever it is, I can handle it, and I am NOT alone.


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
Scotland #2590684 01/27/12 04:04 PM
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 122
G
Member
Offline
Member
G
Joined: Jan 2012
Posts: 122
No, you aren't alone- you are very blessed with all the support and friends you have here! smile

Scotland #2590690 01/27/12 04:12 PM
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 120
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: May 2010
Posts: 120
Yup, Scotty ROCKS!

He threw SNOW BALLS at the boys' windows?!?!?!? Um, maturity seems to be lacking.... naughty

And did he miss the part about you going DARK?!? Hello, why don't you call the IM if you're worried to check and see if something had happened!!!! WW's.... sigh...

Anyways, you have got some awesome boys there! And happy belated birthday Scotty's DS9!

cd78 #2590704 01/27/12 05:17 PM
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 11,650
I
Member
Offline
Member
I
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 11,650
Originally Posted by Scotland
Originally Posted by faithful follower
It sounds like it didn't phase the boys which is interesting. I hope DS9 had a good birthday.

They have had my Plan B prep talks for 2 years, they know how to handle Bampot knocking when he isn't supposed to be here.

DS9 had a WONDERFUL birthday, as we did our new tradition of IHOP. He LOVES that place.



Ooooh I love IHOP. Why they dont open one in the UK, I dont know...!

As for the snowball malarky - thats just a typical wayward gone insane.

It'll be interesting to see what your IM says.


What would you do if you were not afraid?

"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.

Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Indie, I'm not asking my IM. I don't really want to know.

CD, nice to see ya hun. I hope everything's going well with you and yours. smile

Yea, I pretty much said that if he wanted to make sure we were safe, he could have called my mom. She lives 12 blocks away and the phone number is the same as when I lived there, and it's in the phone book. It was probably just a typical wayward reaction to not having things the way he expected. eh whatever.

I'm kinda over it now. grin


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
Scotland #2590768 01/27/12 08:30 PM
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
P
Member
Offline
Member
P
Joined: Oct 2000
Posts: 35,996
Plan B Scotty style ..... NO DRAMA MAMA !!!

kiss

Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
S
Member
OP Offline
Member
S
Joined: Oct 2009
Posts: 8,240
Originally Posted by Pepperband
Plan B Scotty style ..... NO DRAMA MAMA !!!

kiss

Yeppers. It feels so right this way. I think that's one reason I get frustrated with people who won't enter Plan B, I KNOW how much better their lives could be without the drama.


BW(Me)aka Scotty:37
DSx2: 10,12
DDAY2(PA)Nov27/09
Plan B Dec18/09
Personal R in works
Scotty's THING laugh
Newly Betrayed click here


Praying for walls and doors. Thanx MM

“Surviving is important. Thriving is elegant.”
? Maya Angelou

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

THANK YOU
Scotland #2590801 01/27/12 09:36 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 10,179
N
Member
Offline
Member
N
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 10,179
They, too, can be a rock star! grin



A smooth sea never made a skilled mariner.
~ English proverb



Neak's Story
Scotland #2590839 01/28/12 12:39 AM
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,870
Originally Posted by Scotland
Whatever it is, I can handle it, and I am NOT alone.

Amen

Scotland #2590845 01/28/12 01:19 AM
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 1,057
G
GJM Offline
Member
Offline
Member
G
Joined: Sep 2011
Posts: 1,057
Originally Posted by Scotland
Originally Posted by Pepperband
Plan B Scotty style ..... NO DRAMA MAMA !!!

kiss

Yeppers. It feels so right this way. I think that's one reason I get frustrated with people who won't enter Plan B, I KNOW how much better their lives could be without the drama.


I know, I know....the time will come. I haven't met Dr Harley's timeline yet.


Me: BH 36
Her: WW 34
Kids: D 14, S 12, S 9
DDay 1-6/2009
DDay 2-9/2011
DDay 3-11/2011
Filed for D 10/2011-Papers Served 11/2011
Divorce final May 24, 2012
My Story



GJM #2590863 01/28/12 03:54 AM
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 1,428
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: May 2011
Posts: 1,428
Originally Posted by Scotland
...and decided this was better for my personal recovery. Thanx for making me think about it though.

Originally Posted by Scotland
Indie, I'm not asking my IM. I don't really want to know.
These two lines grabbed me Scotty. The quotes of a true Plan B ROCKSTAR!!!


Me (BW): 35
Married 1999 with no kids, DDay July 2011, OC born September 2012, Divorce final November 2012.

WXH (Gollum) is corrupted by his A, and now forever bound to it.

Plan B has set me free.

"Mourn the man he was. Know the man he is."
Scotland #2590866 01/28/12 05:24 AM
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 11,650
I
Member
Offline
Member
I
Joined: Jun 2011
Posts: 11,650
Originally Posted by Scotland
Indie, I'm not asking my IM. I don't really want to know.

CD, nice to see ya hun. I hope everything's going well with you and yours. smile

Yea, I pretty much said that if he wanted to make sure we were safe, he could have called my mom. She lives 12 blocks away and the phone number is the same as when I lived there, and it's in the phone book. It was probably just a typical wayward reaction to not having things the way he expected. eh whatever.

I'm kinda over it now. grin



Ahhahahhahaha! just when I think Ive got Plan B all wrapped up in my philosophy the master shows us all how it is done!


What would you do if you were not afraid?

"Fear is the little death. Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert.

Page 183 of 199 1 2 181 182 183 184 185 198 199

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
0 members (), 1,079 guests, and 45 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Mike69, petercgeelan, Zorya, Reyna98, Nofoguy
71,829 Registered Users
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2019, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5