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Originally Posted by Rocketqueen
When Dr Harley talks about the just compensation in this clip, I think that kiss is good on the first part (the EPs) but lacking in the second part: rebuilding a romantic relationship with me.


Thirded.


And we know where the major roadblock is.


The truth in the matter is, he may have to suck it up and face utilizing the experience from his present job to find a new job, with a new company, that will compliment his marriage.


The retail management hierarchy is brutal on marriages.


"An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field." - Niels Bohr

"Smart people believe weird things because they are skilled at defending beliefs they arrived at for non-smart reasons." - Michael Shermer

"Fair speech may hide a foul heart." - Samwise Gamgee LOTR
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I'll agree with Kiss's failures to build that "romantic marriage" as the cause of the loss of progress here. A structured, measured participation in the complete MB Program would be greatly useful, yes?

I'm going to temporize in the "job" contribution/adjustment, however. I'm having a difficult time imagining ANY employment today in which the expectations of the check-writers are not seriously corrosive on marriages. (Trip, your industry, given the ever-changing hours and emotional toll, has got to be among the WORST!

To hear that on those hours that he is not commuting/working, Kiss invests his time in video-gaming would suggest that his failures can be traced to other traits beside his career path - laziness, selfishness, and immaturity come immediately to mind.

(Man, it's only 6:45am, and I'm already jacked up! Gotta have breakfast now before diving into the twenty-five new posts on XXYH's thread!)

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Originally Posted by NeverGuessed
I'll agree with Kiss's failures to build that "romantic marriage" as the cause of the loss of progress here. A structured, measured participation in the complete MB Program would be greatly useful, yes?

Agree!


If you are serious about saving your marriage, you can't get it all on this forum. You've got to listen to the Marriage Builders Radio show, every day. Install the app!

Married to my radiant trophy wife, Prisca, 19 years. Father of 8.
Attended Marriage Builders weekend in May 2010

If your wife is not on board with MB, some of my posts to other men might help you.
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Originally Posted by NeverGuessed
Trip, your industry, given the ever-changing hours and emotional toll, has got to be among the WORST!

Dude... I am only scheduled to work 8-10 days a month. 16 hour days, but only that.

I'm quiet during the week on the board because I'm at home. >.<

Not to mention, my employers know that my wife will come and bring me meals at work, and that I don't come to work on date nights.

I made the moves to put my marriage first.


"An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field." - Niels Bohr

"Smart people believe weird things because they are skilled at defending beliefs they arrived at for non-smart reasons." - Michael Shermer

"Fair speech may hide a foul heart." - Samwise Gamgee LOTR
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I have a yo-yo-ing love bank. frown


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Has kiss listened to your show?


Markos' Wife
FWW - EA
8 kids ...
What to do with an Angry Husband

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Originally Posted by Prisca
Has kiss listened to your show?

No, I chickened out. Silly, right? But my lovebank was getting filled at the time and I felt bad about what I said to Joyce.

Then yesterday I come home from work, looking forward to seeing kiss and he was asleep on the couch and pretty much stayed there allll night. He didn't sleep much the night before and I know I should be understanding. But it disappointed me.


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Has he ever been checked for low-level depressive tendencies - poor sleep regulation, lack of enthusiasm, preferment of solitary (computer) entertainment?

Not sure how you'd raise that possibility, but a check-up from the neck up might yield some benefits.

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A check up by a doctor or psychologist?

I know that my IC has offered to speak to us together. Maybe kiss would be willing to do that.

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Again, I think our biggest obstacle is his job. If he didn't have to be st work at 5am some mornings then he wouldn't be too tired for UA time that night. But if I have to eliminate those nights when he works so early, then that leaves us lacking, even if they are only once or twice a week.


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While not saying the job is NO part of this, I'm just getting suspicious that it's not the ONLY part. The "sitting at the computer playing games" when you and he are both at home has zippity-do-dah to do with work. Had those two/three hours been devoted to romancing his spouse, his occasional cat-naps on arriving home would not be so grating, right?

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Originally Posted by NeverGuessed
While not saying the job is NO part of this, I'm just getting suspicious that it's not the ONLY part. The "sitting at the computer playing games" when you and he are both at home has zippity-do-dah to do with work. Had those two/three hours been devoted to romancing his spouse, his occasional cat-naps on arriving home would not be so grating, right?

X2.

And Taffy and I are sitting right here, too, RQ.... So I read your thread like a hawk....


Me: BW, 57 fWH: 63 (Taffy1) Serial cheater
Presently on the Recovery Road, in the Online program.
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Yes, I know you're right. Now I'm feeling withdrawn again.

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Originally Posted by NeverGuessed
Has he ever been checked for low-level depressive tendencies - poor sleep regulation, lack of enthusiasm, preferment of solitary (computer) entertainment?

Not sure how you'd raise that possibility, but a check-up from the neck up might yield some benefits.


Heh.

You just described me.


Worth checking into, RQ.


Is KISS a tobacco user?


"An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field." - Niels Bohr

"Smart people believe weird things because they are skilled at defending beliefs they arrived at for non-smart reasons." - Michael Shermer

"Fair speech may hide a foul heart." - Samwise Gamgee LOTR
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Originally Posted by HoldHerHand
Originally Posted by NeverGuessed
Has he ever been checked for low-level depressive tendencies - poor sleep regulation, lack of enthusiasm, preferment of solitary (computer) entertainment?

Not sure how you'd raise that possibility, but a check-up from the neck up might yield some benefits.


Heh.

You just described me.


Worth checking into, RQ.


Is KISS a tobacco user?

No, he is not.


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Dang it...every day I see your screen name and sing that song in my head! over...and over..!



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LOL!! Well the way I sing it is

"Here I am
And I'm a Rocket Queen
I might be a little young
But Honey I ain't naive
Here I am
And I'm a Rocket Queen oh yeah
I might be too much
But honey I'm a bit obscene" laugh


Last edited by Rocketqueen; 07/18/13 01:26 PM.
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FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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Thanks Brainy girl!


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Originally Posted by Rocketqueen
Thanks Brainy girl!
You're welcome.


FWW/BW (me)
WH
2nd M for both
Blended Family with 7 kids between us
Too much hurt and pain on both sides that my brain hurts just thinking about it all.



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