Originally Posted by anonymityplease
To living_well:

I'm not sure which you mean by your opening paragraph. You regret that you exposed the past affair to your children and family? Or you regret that you didn't expose the past affair further to more people and more publicly?

Sorry that I was not clear. Yes I told immediate family right away but there was no broad exposure. For example, friends and neighbours were not told. He showed up at my mother's funeral as the bereaved son in law. Indeed he even spoke to the priest before the service and said I was a wicked woman for abandoning my family and should not be put in the front row. Fortunately the priest ignored him.

Maybe I should add that the divorce took six years as he fought it every step of the way.

Originally Posted by anonymityplease
When the affair reappeared months later, did you publicly expose the affair to everyone at that point? If not, why not? If so, why did it not work well? The affair would have been current and ongoing at that point.

No I did not although I should have. It is exactly what I should have done. I just filed for divorce citing her as his adultery partner. There was no 'no fault' divorce in my state at that time.

Originally Posted by anonymityplease
My apologies for not fully understanding what you're trying to say. Your situation sounds more similar to mine at this point. Thanks.

Affairs are addictions. How is the snooping going?

3 adult children
Divorced - he was a serial adulterer
Now remarried, thank you MB
(formerly lied_to_again)