Melody,

Glad to see you are still here after all these years. Seeing your posting history helping others is commendable. I hope all is well with you and yours. I felt a need to come back and share by experiences with a place that I hold dear to me, and will never forget the assistance I got when I needed it most. What I appreciate on these boards is the honest opinions given to help the victims of affairs. I needed to share my experience, because I thought never in a million years it would be possible for me to be drawn away from my wife. But, the most odd thing was, even with all my needs met, my brain was running thru excuses to try and advance its feelings for this girl. It actually scared me. To even try and reason something like this is crazy. A 50 something man, interested in a 20 something girl, a recipe for disaster to say the least. If the victims of affairs can get anything out of this, it's the innocence of how these things get started, here I am knowing what I know, trying to help, getting funneled toward the teeth of infidelity.

An interesting read, if you have a chance, is how teachers get involved with students in both high school and colleges. They give up their teaching careers, get prosecuted, get registered as sex offenders, ruin their livelihoods, marriages, relationship with kids, all over an inappropriate relationship with students. The emotion of sex drive is so strong, managing it with a level head is extremely hard, even for people like us who are well versed in Marriage Builders techniques.

I don't come here to be lectured on what to do, but to give back some interesting information on personal experiences and how to avoid pitfalls that come along life's journey.
The thing I learned is even if all emotional needs are meet, the mind still will wander, so constant attention has to be paid even after full recovery.