The counsellor recommended anti-depressants but as I was breastfeeding then, I couldn't use that. So, I really had wild mood swings which often turned violent. The rage and fury stem from the 'wonderful' marriage I thought we had, and the twisted plot of an affair that had all the dramas of the movie fatal attraction.<P>It wasn't easy to cope. I was advised to compartmentalise my activitis, i.e., time to sleep, tend to baby, time to think about the A, etc..<P>I found calling supportive friends and family members helped. I avoided places and people that could trigger something off. Now it is much better, I go out more and devote my time and attention to baby.<P>I dream and think of how I can rise above the situation and shine for my baby and be an example for her.<P>My WS's remorse helped some but his defensiveness often make me angry again.<P>I also go out more to get some life and visit family often to get busy and support.<P>Praying and surrendering all to Jesus helps me, too. I lift my hands and say "All to Jesus I surrender, I surrender all".<P>God Loves you.<BR>Take care