Welcome to the
Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum

This is a community where people come in search of marriage related support, answers, or encouragement. Also, information about the Marriage Builders principles can be found in the books available for sale in the Marriage Builders® Bookstore.
If you would like to join our guidance forum, please read the Announcement Forum for instructions, rules, & guidelines.
The members of this community are peers and not professionals. Professional coaching is available by clicking on the link titled Coaching Center at the top of this page.
We trust that you will find the Marriage Builders® Discussion Forum to be a helpful resource for you. We look forward to your participation.
Once you have reviewed all the FAQ, tech support and announcement information, if you still have problems that are not addressed, please e-mail the administrators at mbrestored@gmail.com
Previous Thread
Next Thread
Print Thread
Page 328 of 333 1 2 326 327 328 329 330 332 333
still seeking #1206823 10/30/07 09:50 AM
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
I tried again this morning, but it's still mostly cloudy, and I couldn't find it in the tiny clear spots. Maybe because the clear spots were in the wrong place in the sky?

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
still seeking #1206824 10/30/07 11:36 AM
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
W
Member
Offline
Member
W
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
Yes, 2long, you need to tell us where to look. We are not, at least some of us are not, astronomickers, you know.

I have some cool slave ghost stories from the 1800's, and the night "the sky fell"... I'm going to try and post them when I remember to bring my book. These stories are so interesting because it's like looking into the minds and cultures of a time that is literally mind blowing. And it was such a short time ago in years. It's so interesting to me. And yes, I see the tragedy and the injustice, but also the beauty in the minds and customs of these people who were forced into slavery. I am fascinated and humbled by their resiliancy, and defiance, if even only in the privacy of their minds (at that time).

"There is that indescribable freshness and unconsciousness about an illiterate person that humbles and mocks the power of the noblest expressive genius.
Walt Whitman

2long, please say hi to Appy for me, as well. Tell him his posts are dearly missed, by me. Also, his great mind and especially his awe and wonder of this universe. (I'll never forget his post on being a scientist, as well as a man of God.)

SS, Faith & TT,

I am so very happy to tell you that that kid of mine got straight A's at her new school....AND she was voted student of the month by the teachers. Can you believe it? Last year she was flunking and getting expelled for fighting and this year she is poster child.

But what really made us proud were the comments by the teachers when her dad went to her conferences. Of course she has always been a very, very maternal and loving human being, it is nice to hear once again. Well even last year all her teachers wrote right next to her big fat "D" lol, that she was a pleasure to have in class.

One said she has such an outlook and attitude that all the other kids look up to her.

That she always makes a point to be nice and engage in conversation the kids who no one seems to say hi to.

That they always look forward to spirit day to see what P will have on. And that she has such great spirit!

I am so happy. What a wonderful thing to stop worrying about her heading down the wrong path. YAY!

weaver #1206825 10/30/07 12:05 PM
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 10,816
2
Member
Offline
Member
2
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 10,816
My bad!

http://www.skyandtelescope.com/observing/home/10862521.html

has the most up2date charts of where the comet is (and it's moving, because that's what they do!)

Also, if you click on the "Comet Holmes Photos" link on that page and scroll down, you'll see a submission by yours truly!

Those of you who know who I am will find it quickly. Those who don't will have all kinds of cool photos sent in by other folk units 2 enjoy!

-ol' 2long

2long #1206826 10/30/07 12:17 PM
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 10,816
2
Member
Offline
Member
2
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 10,816
Quote
These stories are so interesting because it's like looking into the minds and cultures of a time that is literally mind blowing. And it was such a short time ago in years. It's so interesting to me. And yes, I see the tragedy and the injustice, but also the beauty in the minds and customs of these people who were forced into slavery. I am fascinated and humbled by their resiliancy, and defiance, if even only in the privacy of their minds (at that time).

This reminds me of a program on PBS that I watched part of last night, about Charles Shultz, author of Peanuts. Granted, not the same sort of "pressure 2 look for peace inward" at all, but a similar result. It seemed that Schultz lived through his car2n characters.

-ol' 2long

2long #1206827 10/30/07 12:35 PM
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
I have heard it said that he considered himself to be a minister/pastor. And, when you read w/ that sort of open mind, you can sort of see it there.

2long #1206828 10/30/07 12:51 PM
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
W
Member
Offline
Member
W
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
Thanks for the link, 2long. One pic was from all the way over in Iran. It must really be way up there to be seen all over like that... must be really bright too, eh?

The article said it may or may not develop a tail.

weaver #1206829 10/30/07 01:20 PM
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
Thanks 2long. I'll look again tonight. It's mostly clear now.

Hi Weaver !!

I hope for an update. You have been through a lot of change. I for one (and I bet others) would like to hear about it.

It's so good to hear that P is doing well. That is good news......... and some of the best kind of good news.

2long, are you getting smoke at your house?

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
still seeking #1206830 10/30/07 02:02 PM
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
W
Member
Offline
Member
W
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
Well I am doing really good. I married a really great guy, what can I say? Thank God, I learned about LB's, DJ's and all that other good stuff, or believe me he would never have married me.

He has just sold one house, the other and his office building are under contract and waiting for closing and he is frantically try to decide what to haul down to GA and what to get rid of. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" /> He's got an attachment problem with stuff, so he is kind of not handling that aspect of it very well, IMO. LOL

Then he is coming up here for Thanksgiving, and we are trying to make arrangements to take P to DisneyWorld for Christmas. He'll leave for Savannah right after and I will follow in a couple of months.

I am very happy, SS. I try to avoid this place most of the time. Not because I can't handle the pain, but because I grow weary of the overall nastiness and intolerance to other peoples beliefs, ideas, thoughts and opinions. It actually hurts me to know that we have come so little. Otherwise I am usually in a place of great peace. I find it unnerving that I get kudos when I respond in anger but nothing when I respond in a loving matter. I wish I could get my point accross in a loving manner, instead of having to resort to that angry manner. This really bothers me about myself.

And the whole victim mentality that is so big here drives me insane.

Life is magnificent. Oh SS, sometimes now when I am out and about I look at the faces of the people/strangers and I see their beauty and I wish I could show it to THEM. I wish I could show them how wonderful life is supposed to be. I wish I could lift them up.

It truly is all about perception. A miracle is simply a change in perception.

weaver #1206831 10/30/07 02:55 PM
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
Life is magnificent. Oh SS, sometimes now when I am out and about I look at the faces of the people/strangers and I see their beauty and I wish I could show it to THEM. I wish I could show them how wonderful life is supposed to be. I wish I could lift them up.

Sounds like you've got it down.
It is so wonderful to read you these days.
Uplifting
Happy

Hard to explain with words....... but it's good.

I understand about avoiding this place. I am often gone for a week or more at a time. I think 2long often thinks along the same lines.

Thanks, I really wanted to know.

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
still seeking #1206832 10/30/07 03:13 PM
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
W
Member
Offline
Member
W
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
I have noticed that you haven't been around much. You never did seem to get caught up in the drama or the negativity. What I never did figure out though, is if you just avoid those types of threads altogether, or if you read but don't allow yourself to get caught up in them.

I have never heard you say one negative thing, or respond in anger. Never.

Sometimes it seems to me that Gray might want this old campfire to die now. He is hardly ever here anymore either.

Maybe it is time. I would like to think that it's time to put the campfire out when Gray is living in joy again. Either with or without a new woman to love. Maybe he already is. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> Seems like every one else is, at least everyone I can think of who have been here all this time.

weaver #1206833 10/30/07 03:37 PM
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 10,816
2
Member
Offline
Member
2
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 10,816
Quote
I find it unnerving that I get kudos when I respond in anger but nothing when I respond in a loving matter. I wish I could get my point accross in a loving manner, instead of having to resort to that angry manner. This really bothers me about myself.

I think this is because most people are "drama-based". Like the evening news - where's the drama in reporting about something someone did because it was their responsibility? Or even if it wasn't? Like GB, when he helped the elderly person rebuild their porch or whatever?

Just know that we are aware, acknowledge, and most definitely appreciate the loving care you put in2 your posts.

-ol' 2long

weaver #1206834 10/30/07 03:39 PM
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
The campfire seems to be a safe place - still.

It's a good place for me to come and see how my friends are doing.

Gray has mentioned a time or two why he no longer lets his feelings hang out here.
Healing is a very individual thing. You came along really fast the last little while. I think Gray was stuck thinking about forgiveness, but I don't know where he is now. Time seems to be helping him, but he doesn't post enough for me (or us) to get a good feel for how he is. I think he may be most comfortable with that.

I try not to get caught up in the anger and negativity because it hurts too much. If I stay in it, I have to become hardened to avoid the pain. Once that happens, I can't respond to help the way I would like to. Sometimes I read the threads, and I ask myself if I could help any, or if it would be a waste of everyone's time. So sometimes I catch the mood early on, and avoid them altogether.

This may sound crude, but someone once told me:
Don't get down in the mud, and wrestle with a pig, because the pig likes it."

I am sure you understand the nuances in that quote.

I really enjoy discussions with people who show respect for others, and think carefully about what is said before responding. Maybe that is why I enjoy this thread so much. Mutual respect goes a long way.


I do have a temper...... my W can tell you that. It doesn't surface much these days though. I am still working on how to communicate in such a way that others know you are serious, and that a change must be made, but they still don't feel blasted, attacked, or hated. It's difficult. I used to get loud, but now I get quiet, and talk with a low voice.

Do you ever get the feeling that English is not our native language? It's really hard to find the words sometimes.

My grandmother would have liked you. She used to say "Isn't it wonderful to live!!"
This was after Grandpa was already gone, and she was alone. I know she was lonely, but she was thankful too. It was hard to visit, and not come away happier.

Thanks again.

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
still seeking #1206835 10/30/07 03:40 PM
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
Just know that we are aware, acknowledge, and most definitely appreciate the loving care you put in2 your posts.

You too 2long. You too. I enjoy reading your posts also.

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
still seeking #1206836 10/30/07 03:59 PM
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 10,816
2
Member
Offline
Member
2
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 10,816
It's funny, speaking of getting sucked in2 the drama, and how I don't post much these days...

I went through a recent spell of posting on loveshack, which is one of those sites with a board for OW/OM 2 post 2. Even there, they get some hard-liners trying 2 get them 2 see the errors of their ways. But there are also many who simply share their experiences as waywards. It's been a long time since I even went there, though.

But I was participating on a thread on the infidelity board that was posted by an OW, who then had the moderator move it 2 the OW/OM board after I'd posted. So, rather than get in2 an argument over there, I asked the moderators 2 delete my posts, which he did (users can't delete their own posts after a period of time, but the mods can delete or edit them at any time)...

A week or 2 ago, another OW 2k issue with something I said about her position, which was posted on someone else's thread - a BW, as I recall. She went away after a day or so, and then a few days later I got a popup telling me that my post would take a day or 2 2 show up, pending moderator review. I thought, Huh? And then I noticed there were several reports about me. I read the complaints, re-read those posts, and decided 2 leave LS for good. I hadn't said anything harsher than I've said here, and frankly a lot less so.

Since the warning messages and holds on my post came from the forum owner, I clicked on his bio 2 see where he might be coming from. ...he's a realtor, or something else entirely relationship-unrelated. For Rice Cake!


Anyway, sorry for the long-winded post here. Like SS, I feel like this is a safe place 2 come and talk about things that are important 2 me and that are "deeper" and thus more rewarding 2 the soul than telescope making, unmanned spaceflight, or antique car restoration, where I get my other, shallower ENs met (but even there, it's possible 2 have silly arguments).

So, I hope gc doesn't mind us stoking the fire from time 2 time.

I've felt a fundamental change in me in the past month, 2. With few exceptions, I don't even open many threads anymore. It's not even just that I don't want 2 be sucked back in2 the drama. I don't, but that's not all. I think I'm starting 2 feel what Pep said 2 me in an email when she was saying goodbye here. I just don't think I have much infidelity "help" in me anymore.

Let's talk about other, more positive things.

-ol' 2long

still seeking #1206837 10/30/07 04:16 PM
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
W
Member
Offline
Member
W
Joined: May 2004
Posts: 7,093
Quote
Do you ever get the feeling that English is not our native language? It's really hard to find the words sometimes.


Every single day of my life.

When I think of my own Grandmother, I know exactly what you mean about yours. You with a temper is almost impossible to imagine. And I don't think I would want to see it, either. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

I can't imagine 2longs posts getting edited, or deleted. That's almost hysterical, if it wasn't so sad.

I can think of hundreds of positive things to talk about instead of infidelity. What a splendid idea! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

I have some ideas 2long, about what you said in a post about you are interested in spirituality. Any interest we have is said to be that thing of interest wanting expression.

You once asked what a soul was, I said I thought it was the part of us that is our mind. Now I think it might be our connection to the divine, and perhaps our individualized expression of the divine.

I know we are all connected to something. I can no longer look at God as I once did, but I know that that is the connection. You called God the Law, I am going to call God the Divine.

And that's where I am with that. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

SS, what I want to thank you for is being who you are. If it wasn't for you, I would have a certain disdain and maybe even hatred for Christianity now, from this board mostly. You make that impossible. Thank you for that. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

2long #1206838 10/30/07 04:16 PM
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
S
Member
Offline
Member
S
Joined: May 2002
Posts: 6,473
Let's talk about other, more positive things.

Like Ice cream?

SS


I think sometimes about all the pain in the world. I hope we can ease that here, even if only a little bit.
weaver #1206839 10/30/07 04:31 PM
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 10,816
2
Member
Offline
Member
2
Joined: Feb 2002
Posts: 10,816
Quote
I can't imagine 2longs posts getting edited, or deleted. That's almost hysterical, if it wasn't so sad.

I think my response 2 the owner started with something like: "Good LORD! Are you kidding me?" <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

But I never got a reply, so I don't know. Nor do I care. I'm pretty sure someone decided 2 report me for something I said 2 them, but I'm not even really sure who that was. Nor do I care. I really hate censorship, though, so I left.

Weaver, I was about 2 say "you sound like a Christian Scientist!" but decided not 2. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

There are a lot of parallels in the things we say from our various and sundry religious backgrounds, and I believe it's because there is something real, something substantial, behind those common themes we express in our own particular, sometimes cryptic, ways. And it's true whether we're religious and spiri2al, or not religious but spiri2al.

It really doesn't matter 2 me whether we're created by God, or whether we created God over the course of our spiri2al evolution as a species.

Life truly is wonderful, particularly when we allow it.

But it can also be horrible, but only if we make it.

-ol' 2long

2long #1206840 10/30/07 07:10 PM
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 2,885
T
Member
Offline
Member
T
Joined: Apr 2005
Posts: 2,885
Weaver - that is so wonderful about your daughter. Just lightens your load somewhat.

Just so you all know - I'm not a native of the campfire but it exudes warmth, love, friendship and peace. You are all such interesting souls. Love reading here.

tucktummy #1206841 10/30/07 08:40 PM
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
C
Member
Offline
Member
C
Joined: May 2000
Posts: 15,150
JOB 7:11 "Therefore I will not keep silent;
I will speak out in the anguish of my spirit,
I will complain in the bitterness of my soul.

ISA 26:9 My soul yearns for you in the night;
in the morning my spirit longs for you.

1TH 5:23 May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.

HEB 4:12 For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.

--------------------------------------------------

My scriptural puzzlement? Does God differentiate between the spirit and the soul? And, if He does, what is the difference?

cinderella #1206842 10/30/07 10:59 PM
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
F
Member
Offline
Member
F
Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 11,539
Weaver! That is wonderful about P, though not surprising considering who her mom is. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

So nice to hear you so happy. Hi SS! Gray, I hope you are well. Hi 2long, FAR and anyone else that is camping these days. Anyone that talks to Appy say "hi" from me.

I am well. My kids are doing great. Weaver, my DD is doing great this year. Her freshman year and she is keeping up with her load which includes several honors classes, in fact an A in biology.


Faith

me: FWW/BS 52 H: FWH/BS 49
DS 30
DD 21
DS 15
OCDS 8
Page 328 of 333 1 2 326 327 328 329 330 332 333

Moderated by  Fordude 

Link Copied to Clipboard
Forum Search
Who's Online Now
2 members (2 invisible), 565 guests, and 54 robots.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Newest Members
Bibbyryan860, Ian T, SadNewYorker, Jay Handlooms, GrenHeil
71,838 Registered Users
Building Marriages That Last A Lifetime
Copyright © 1995-2019, Marriage Builders®. All Rights Reserved.
Site Navigation
Powered by UBB.threads™ PHP Forum Software 7.7.5