Well today makes 6 years of marriage. I wonder if STBX will even think of it. The past 2 years since I found out about the A have been hell for me. My DD is the only reason I survived. How I would desperately love to have another chance at making the M work, but WH won't try. He admits late his is living in limbo and taking things day by day, but it hasn't affected him moving on with GF. On most days the fight seems to be out of me, but some like today the hurt is so intense.
I still love him and I am not letting go well. I read other posts here and see hope, so I know things will get better. I just hate the pain and hell I must endure to get there. How would of thought 6 years ago today that this is where I would be in life?

My heart goes out to you. You will be ok. I promise you!
My STBX left a year ago and I never thought I would be where I am today. I am finally finding some happiness and know that I will survive this....and you will too. My STBX didn't acknowlege our 15th wedding anniv. in January. I decided that I would make that day a "mom and son" day and we had a great time. For years to come that will always be our day. You have to find some positive in it. I wish you luck. God bless you.

Yep - those anniversary's, holidays, birthdays, etc..are painful..But, for everyone of them that he lets down or isnt' spending them with you - you will get stronger..

I've been caught up in this torment for 2 years now too..It does get easier..I'm to the point that I see clearly What I No Longer Want In My Life..it takes time, it takes heartache and tears - but, you will get thru this. You will get to a point that you don't want him back..and you'll cry for that lose of feeling too..

Hugs and Healing Vibes...

I know what you mean.

This last Friday was our 17 anniversary of our first date. And to top it off? It was on a Friday and the weather is the same as it was 17 years ago...HOT! It is almost as if we came full circle. It hurts and who thought that after nine years of marriage this would have happened to us.

We don't get married only to wonder what year mark will we end up divorce.

I wish I could say something better. The only thing that helps me get through this is things are bound to get better.

Ali~

{{{Lucky}}} I am so sorry!! It is sad cause DD13 and I were just talking about this... that her Daddy and I were approaching our 15th anniversary and didn't quite make it...sad!!

It will be a very hard day indeed! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/frown.gif" alt="" /> I, too, have wondered if WH will even notice the date...then again I think he will and I hope it hurts! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/mad.gif" alt="" /> OK, not very Christian like, I am sorry! <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/shocked.gif" alt="" />

Hugs to all who are traveling down this road of tears!

Thanks for your support. My DD and I went to a friend's house. All of my friends were there (all couples and their kids). It was really hard on me. I was the one that didn't have the husband. Then to make things worse STBX didn't call to say goodnight to our DD. He stated last night that he would be down Tues to pick her up, but I didn't think that he wouldn't call tonight. It really hurt a lot because that probably means he didn't work like usual, but had plans with GF, probably something fun or he would of called even if she was around. It hurts that he went with her on our anniversary. I wonder if he had any thoughts of me today when he wrote the date down. Why does it bother me so much? He hurt me so much and let me go. Why do I still care? How can I let go???? I really don't know how, but I want/NEED to desperately before it destroys me.

Lucky Star --- It is going to hurt for awhile - really it is ... and then it will get better - it may always hurt - but the hurt will not be as intense or as consuming.... Letting go I am not sure there is any cure for that - I guess it just comes with living your life for yourself more and more - and it just sort of becomes a distant memory... I was not with my ex for our 15th anniversary - and you know what - he knew it was our anniversary -- but he chose to pretend that he didn't - I like to think that somewhere in his mind - he would feel to guilty if he acknowledge it you know??? And as for being the only person without a significant other - that is hard also but sooner or later you will not even notice... It is funny but you will realize just how strong you really are and it will come a time - that though you love your ex and you probably will always love him - you would never take back the person that he has become... So you just have to put one foot in front of the other - day after day....