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Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 988
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Posts: 988
xW is getting married this week and I find myself feeling emotions I haven’t felt in months. It’s been a year since I lost my job and a year since she left. The fact that she is marrying the OM at our family’s church bothers me. That she has our kids involved in this madness angers me. But the kicker is that she refuses to acknowledge the confusion this has caused our 6 y/o. She wants me to explain to him that ‘what is, is’ and that he needs not to live in a fantasy.

My son wants to know why mommy left and she wants to deny that her actions affected her children. Seems like she is the one living a fantasy. The Fog seems thicker than ever… How do I approach this?


Me (BS) 44
M: 6/28/91
D-day 8/07/03
PA/EA 9/27/02 to 8/8/03
W Restarts A 2/04
W's DV Final: 08/03/04
Joined: Mar 2001
Posts: 675
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She wants me to explain to him that ‘what is, is’ and that he needs not to live in a fantasy.

[color:"blue"]Unfortunately, what is, is. Your ex is getting married. At 6, you don't have to tell your son that mommy is a cheat and a liar, but you also cannot deny the facts. Put aside your own hurt feelings for a moment and reassure your son that no matter what the two of you care about him.

V. [/color]

Joined: Jun 2004
Posts: 988
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I do reassure him. My problem is that she doesn't feel the need to do that as much as get him to agree that this new arrangement is a good thing for everyone. It's not about me or her; it's about our kids.


Me (BS) 44
M: 6/28/91
D-day 8/07/03
PA/EA 9/27/02 to 8/8/03
W Restarts A 2/04
W's DV Final: 08/03/04

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