To Big&Mrs.K:

I appreciate your hanging with me here. You know, I just want to do the right thing, and all this repressed anger is killing me. Not to mention that 4 years without marriage intimacy is driving me crazy. Everytime I get my e-mail these days there is some porn spam trying to sneak in, whispering "click me, click me". I muster all my strength to zap/delete before I succumb to click/defeat.

Tomorrow I communicate directly with the pastor. Enough of the psychbabble and spiritual pablum. I love my wife, she doesn't love me. She's in 99% withdrawal. I can't touch her or she repels emotionally. Communication is on the order of workplace associates. She can read a devotional an hour after watching Desperate Housewives or Gray's Anatomy. We're talking a major Romans 7 Jekyll-Hyde here.

Another thing, the MC has wanted me to be a defender of my WW's "journey" when her family or mom do a frontal attack or start prying. A DEFENDER he wants me to be. So, if they start confronting, I'm to be the defensive tackle and say something like "please back off, my wife is on a journey of spiritual healing and relational reconnection. Please give her some space".

You know, I'd be HAPPY to put on the flack jacket for her IF I had confidence in her DESIRE for this to get our M fixed. As it is, I'm asked to defend a WW who, for all appearances, is still in an EA and is going through the motions with who-knows-what agenda. And if she is looking for ME to be transformed first, it'll never happen because she is unwilling/unable to release her resentments towards me for my past failings as a husband. Golly, I never did rise to "soulmate" rank. Surely, OM did.

If I suggest that I want a no-holds-barred Truth Session or verbal commitment from her(er..."proof" he says) of an NC agreement, I am defined as "not trusting" and disregarding I Cor 13 (etc. verses).

So, I am forming the questions I want answered over the next few days.

Has ANYONE on these boards encountered such a weird A situation as mine? Or is this still pretty typical given the length of the A and the circumstances.

Incidently, the sleeping situation has it's own built in solution due to the nature of our lodging business and the need for overnight shifts. Hence, one night her, next night me, etc. Only the 1-2 nights a week when we have an employee on duty does it get uncomfortable.

Finally, my struggle is also that I don't want to even think of a D (I believe she doesn't either) for the sake of the kids. But this isn't a marriage! Part of me wants to be the sacrificial lamb and make her life miserable as the OM dream decays in her mind, part of me wants to just do a full-blown Exposure of the OM and let the chips fall where they may.

For now, I'm going to press the pastors. Let's stop the psycho-fluff which is enabling her. Let's get lovingly surgical. The OM does not seem to me be a true MC, but rather a psychologist adapting selected Bible concepts according to his own restorative model. I am not vindictive, but I am resolute in my eagerness to move this along. She needs help, we need help, and our kids need a genuine loving home again. I've been deceived for 4 years.

Tiring and draining this is. On I go....

BH

BH,

I don't know if I have ever posted to you before, but I felt the need to tonight. I have followed your story for quite awhile and have felt I could really contribute nothing to the conversation that you were not already receiving from many fine people here.

Tonight, I feel the need to speak with you.

There are some things that you need to remember, and it seems there are some things you need to be encouraged to do.

Under the remember category.

1. God hates divorce, but it is NOT forbidden and you know the reasons: adultery and a hardened heart. I mention this to you for a reason. If you don't consider this an option, then you leave yourself thinking in hopeless circles. You have options and however unlikely or little you want to consider them, you need to.

2. An affair as long as your W's takes a lot more than 3 months to withdraw from. The odds are it will take a year or more. Further, since you two do not share much time together, withdrawal or the lack of reconnection could take on a permenant situation. You need to consider possible ways to alter your life style so that the two or you are together much more. There is more to this world than money, although I do appreciate that one needs to have some to survive.

3. Consider the roll model you and your W are setting for your kids. Divorce is never easy on kids, but living in a house with many secrets, lies, and an unloving mother and dad is not good either.

Now I would like to encourage you to speak as you are thinking to your pastor and the MC. The MC is making a huge mistake if they only focus on HER while laying everything at your feet. Characterizing you as "analytical" is often a dismissive strategy used by those that cannot think or will not face the reality of their limitations or mistakes. Your W AND the MC seem to be a bit short on the facing reality and strong on covering the mistakes bit.

I would also like to say something I have never said here. I have in my life time run into and KNOW many people very adroit at quoting Bible passages. I honor their ability to memorize. It however does not indicate an ability to understand. The Bible is NOT a collection of sound bites. It is a WHOLE work, given to guide and offer an overall view of the world and a glimpse of what is beyond. People holding you to ONE passage of the Bible are ignoring the other passages and the messages to help the suffering. They miss that forgiveness, compassion, grace, and yes love to be given to ONE ANOTHER. IT is a two way street.

So when discussing these things with your clergy, you might remind them, that you would expect to see a bit of the two way street from them, your W, as well as yourself.

I won't say more. I have no idea how your situation will finally turn out. But, I do know this. If you learn from it, grow from it, YOU will become a better man. Whether any, some, or no one recognizes is not as important as the fact that you are.

I do hope something I have said causes you to pause and think a bit. I even hope that something I have said is of use to you.

God Bless,

JL

JL:

Thanks for your words. Today my WW met with the MC. I also spoke with my pastor for 20 min on the phone. More revelations.

I explained my disappoinment and struggle without having NC established. He connected this with my not being "in control" and trusting the situation to God as committed to my church leadership. I strongly objected to the "control" inference. Furthermore, I expressed a loss of confidence in the MCs methods. After I vented, he recommended that I share all my feelings with the MC, assuring me that there WAS good communication btween P and MC. Additionally, they are about ready to have a pow-wow to discuss the status of our counseling, taking the next steps.

THEN my WW returned from counseling. Her comments to me were "Well, I saw MC today. (noticeable drop in enthusiasm..) He said the same old things to me. (I didn't reply, but just listened as she changed the subject)....

SO, tomorrow I speak with the MC. I have a suspicion that we're at a crossroads. My WW must be deeply messed up inside - this again is why I proceed gingerly.

As for the healing time, I'm beginning to see that her withdrawal from the OM will take a long time. I'm prepared for that. Just PLEASE, WW, give me a commitment to NC. Hmmm....I may not even get that for awhile. But this I know - if there is any hint of communication from him, the big Exposure will come down fast, directly from me. For now, I've given the "strategy" to my church leadership. I will press for communication to HIS church leadership tomorrow.

As for roll modeling, well, there IS an absence of affection between my WW and me (obviously on her side, but I react to it accordingly). But there is no lack of affection for the kids, plus there is no overt hostility between my WW and me. We're not unloving at all. Whew. No fighting, no arguing. Just sort of co-existing. Not exciting, but not devastating. But it MUST change.

As you correctly pointed out JL, the job situation needs to be addressed. There is a plan in the works, but it will take some time - maybe a few more months. Meanwhile, job stress adds to the equation. For now, I ask my WW out whenever possible.

She is fighting depression on several fronts, I believe. OM breakup, 3 kids at home, job stress, a husband she doesn't have feelings for, family is against her. Oh boy.

And so, I stand in the wings, hanging onto the roller coaster for dear life, pleading with God for strength to make it through each day while avoiding the many temptations us guys deal with regularly.

I more resolute than ever. My kids need to have an example of faithfulness right now. The buck stops here.

BH

BH,

Honestly, while I do appreciate your submission to your church's leadership, it is my personal experience that regardless of Pastors seeing infidelity and dealing with it every day, they are utterly clueless about how to deal with it.

We have a word to describe such actions (inaction) as you describe - it is ENABLING. No more no less.

Your church leadership, no doubt with the very best of intentions is working AGAINST your marriage.

I must admit I am still very puzzled as to why you refuse to expose this affair. My wife's affair was effectively dead 4 days after exposure. Of all the things a BS can do, exposure is the best thing they can do to end an affair.

I have a name for you insisting on NC - it's called STANDING AGAINST SIN. Does your pastor not recognise that your wife is in DEEP SIN right now and needs to END this. It is NOT about control.

BH, there are things you have written that cause me great concern about your recovery and the counseling you have been receiving, both with your Pastor and with the MC.

I am going to have to think about this some more before opening my mouth. For now, let me say that JL's post appears to be the most "spot on" right now concerning your situation.

One thing you might want to ask your Pastor the next time you speak with him is whether or not he has ever heard of Nouthetic Counseling or the National Association of Nouthetic Counselors.

If you want a lot of biblical verses, I can give them to you, but right now my "sense" of what is needed can best be summed up by ONE verse from the Lord Himself....

"If you love me, obey my commands."

If a Christian will not submit to the Lord in humble obedience, it strongly indicates that NOTHING will be "fixed" until the relationship with Christ is addressed first.

What can you tell us about your wife, her faith in Christ as you know it, and her relationship with Christ?

Having endured 4 years of contacts while in Recovery, I think I have a "grasp" on the emotional impact you are feeling. But let me leave you with one key thought, Miracles happen when we are obedient to God.

God bless.

P.S. If you don't have a copy of Dave Carder's book Torn Asunder I would strongly urge you to get a copy ASAP and read it cover to cover. It is a book about affairs, recovering from affairs, etc. from a Christian perspective. I found it invaluable.

BK & FH:

My gratitude for sticking with my thread in view of the overwhelming number of heartaches on MB.

Both my wife and I have solid Christian backgrounds. I am a Bible college grad and she had 2 years at a Bible college also. She comes from a committed Christian extended family. I was saved at 19, only child, lower middle class, dysfunctional home, moved regularly, did not develop relationships well as a result. I pursued hobbies and enjoyed intellectual things. Frankly, I was a social "loner" - although I did have friends, there was rarely any depth. My conversion while in a public university was a very black/white decision back then, and I forged ahead with vigor. God was, in a really practical sense, the only role model I had. I developed a conservative view of my faith and tried my best to carefully guard my Christian growth so that I would please my Father in heaven.

My wife's experience was very different, having grown up in a stable Christian home, upper middle class, lots of meaningful friendships. She is very outgoing, down-to-earth, and thrives on interpersonal connection.

I was attracted to her in numerous ways, but especially I felt drawn to having a real family and the chance to experience love in a whole new way. Indeed, I can see underlying "selfishness" in this, but I honestly wanted to give as much to. But I didn't feel I had much to give but my heart.

As far as Nouthetic counseling, I mentioned this early on to my pastor after a church friend suggested it. Then, the church linked us up with our MC. I mentioned this approach to the MC, but he has a less than high view of it. Furthermore, he felt (feels) that my WW is so afar off from God that a confrontational approach would drive her in the wrong direction. I suspect that some Nouthetic counselors have misappropriated the concepts and skills, turning it into a finger-pointing, hostile confrontation. I also suspect that this is a charactature of what it really is. God hates sin and declares the specifics in the Word. But He also is Love and defines its essence in His expressed character and in the same Bible.

There has been value in our MCs approach in that I AM understanding more about me than a Bible verse could reveal. Since the length of the A is at least 3 years, part of me thinks that a session with Bible verses may not quite hit the nail. On the other hand, even the MC and pastor know that - at a certain point - a more directive approach is needed. So I pray, I love, I wait, I hang onto hope. I still trust that they know what that "point" is. The MC wants me to remain obedient, humble, and responsive to God's counseling in I Cor 13 while he works with my WW on her issues. I work on mine.

The MCs focus is my WWs inner life and walk with God - the "reconnection" if you will. His immediate objective is not marriage renewal as much as heart renewal with God and understanding His character and will for us personally. The hope is that this approach will be tender, yet firm. My constant struggle is not hearing of an NC committment or of my wife's intentions regarding our marriage. Does she value it at all? Does she understand the seriousness of our committment to each other and the implcations if it shatters?

So, there it is. I do not need to "control" as much as I need to have baseline "confidence" in the MCs non-directive approach. Its agonizing to remain steadfast in the face of the swirling storm. In a way, I'm like Peter being asked to step out of the boat without knowing that Christ will say "Peace, Be Still". It's finding the balance between trusting and personally taking action that's eating at me.
The other thing is that I don't know if our situation is a standard-typical Plan A/Plan B crisis, or if there is room more "modified Plan A" depending on the specifics. I'm open to hearing from anyone who can lend insight here!

Maybe today's MC session will reveal more to me. We shall see.

Thanks again!

BH

BH - You are the one who "has all the information" and the one who has to decide what is needed in your situation.

No one, least of all me, is going to tell you that recovery from infidelity (my wife's affair was 6 years in length) is "easy" or "smooth." It is not. In the past I have written often about the "rollercoaster" of recovery, the "two steps forward, one step backward" sort of way that recovery progressess.

You place your confidence in the Pastor and the MC and I will not interfere. Consider this, "too many cooks can spoil the meal."

With respect to Nouthetic Counseling, since they have apparently rejected biblical based counseling for Christians from what you wrote; "As far as Nouthetic counseling, I mentioned this early on to my pastor after a church friend suggested it. Then, the church linked us up with our MC. I mentioned this approach to the MC, but he has a less than high view of it. Furthermore, he felt (feels) that my WW is so afar off from God that a confrontational approach would drive her in the wrong direction. I suspect that some Nouthetic counselors have misappropriated the concepts and skills, turning it into a finger-pointing, hostile confrontation. I also suspect that this is a charactature of what it really is. God hates sin and declares the specifics in the Word. But He also is Love and defines its essence in His expressed character and in the same Bible," all I can say is that there appears to be a large misunderstanding regarding Nouthetic Counseling. CAN a given "counselor" misuse ANY counseling? You bet. The "core belief," if you will, of Nouthetic Counseling is to "confront" in love the professing believers with the Word of God, per the 2Timothy 3:16 TRUTH of God that "All Scripture is God-breathed [inspired] and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness."

Whether or not their "rejection" of Nouthetic counseling is based in some "bad experience" with a counselor or if it is based in some belief of "helping God," I don't know. But I would ask about their view of the Bible as THE Word of God, inspired and inerrant. If the answer is "yes, that is what they believe," then what is their "take" on Matthew 18:15-20?

Here is the "crux" of the matter for all believers in Christ, "Whose will WILL be done?" A believer has been "bought and paid for" by the blood of Christ. Even Jesus Himself submitted to the Father's will in humble obedience. Are we such that we "don't have to submit our will to God's will UNLESS we 'feel like it'?" It is NOT an issue of CAPACITY, for all Christians have been given the capacity, the ability, to obey God. It is an issue of the WILL and the FLESH.

I am not there so I do not know what your wife has been saying or doing. But I can tell you from a similar "past experience" that the "tendrils" of an involved Class II affair run deep and it often takes a long time for a Wayward Spouse to fully "extricate" themselves from the entanglements. But, EACH and every time there is a "violation," a "contact," they must be confronted, in love, with what GOD has to say about it. Yes, you can also make it clear that you have a Boundary, and that boundary is NO Contact with the "partner in sin who set out to destroy your marriage and your wife's relationship with Christ." How long you will remain patient will depend on you. For me, the "bottom line" was fairly simple. If I felt there was ANY part of the contact that was an attempt to "hold onto" the affair or to "reinitiate the affair," I was THROUGH with the marriage because God's directive is quite clear. God IS a God of love and will not "force" a Faithful believing Spouse to live with someone who is willfully sinning in adultery. In fact, God makes it crystal clear that someone who does not REPENT and LEAVE adultery never was saved and will NOT be in heaven. For me, my own strenght was "not enough." Several times the emotions would overwhelm me and the "time it was taking" would seem "too long" and I felt ready to "toss in the towel and end the misery." Philippians 4:13 was MY anchor in those dark valley days. Let it be your source of strength too. You are NOT in this "battle" alone. You do not know what God's will in the matter is or how long God knows it will "take." But you can put your trust and faith in God, according to the promise He made you in Romans 8:28-39.

So what is "presented" is a "crisis in faith" situation where the sinner needs to make a choice FOR God or FOR Satan, the world, and the "flesh." Until a choice is made FOR God, there can BE NO recovery of a marriage based in Christ.

Here, in a nutshell, is the "concept" behind Nouthetic counseling, in my humble opinion.

"Flee the evil desires of youth, and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace, along with those who call on the Lord out of a pure heart. Don't have anything to do with foolish and stupid arguments, because you know they produce quarrels. And the Lord's servant must not quarrel; instead, he must be kind to everyone, able to teach, not resentful. Those who oppose him he must gently instruct, in the hope that God [NOT Man] will grant them repentance leading them to a knowledge of the truth, and they will come to their senses and escape from the trap of the devil, who has taken them captive to do his will." (2Tim 2:22-26)

Last comment for you to think about. "So, there it is. I do not need to "control" as much as I need to have baseline "confidence" in the MCs non-directive approach."

BH, YOU are the head of your household, "standing in" as Christ is the "bridegroom of the church." That is a God-give position that God gave YOU, not the Pastor or the MC. God has commanded that you love your wife AS Christ loves the church and gave Himself for her. But Christ steadfastly relied on God, stood for God, and submitted His "humaness" to the Father. There is NOTHING that Jesus did not endure for you except for being sinful Himself. He remained perfect so that you and I don't HAVE to be, but can have His perfection as the goal we strive to conform our lives to. We are FORGIVEN because we cannot BE perfect and Christ gives us His perfection to have as we stand before God.

BH, our (believers) confidence is in the LORD, not in any man. IF a man tells you something that is "in conflict" with the revealed Word of God, YOU have to choose. Let the Holy Spirit be your guide in discerning what is "of God" and what is not. Study the Scripture so that you WILL be able to discern.

With respect to the “non-directive approach,” what did Jesus tell the woman accused of adultery? “Go and do whatever YOU think you should do” OR “Go and LEAVE your life of sin?” What did Jesus tell the Pharisees? The “in control” person is Christ, not us. We STAND for Christ and we forgive repentant sinners AS Christ has forgiven us. But Christ gave the Faithful Spouse the RIGHT of “control” on staying with a spouse who has committed adultery. So, you, the Faithful Spouse (the Betrayed Spouse) ARE “in control” of the recovery of your marriage and you do not have the right to relinquish that right(assigned to you also in this case as the Head of your Household) to someone else. You can use the assistance of someone else(if they are a believer), but the CONTROL remains yours and God’s (yours for the continuance or ending of your marriage, God's for the condition of her heart).


God bless.

I've been following your story BH. I see a lot of enabling going on across the board, but it's being disguised as "pure crap."

The good book doesn't give exact instructions on how to put an end to drug addiction, similarly - it doesn't give detailed instructions on how to kill an affair, which is an addiction to another person .. an addiction to the feeling that you get when you're with that person.. An A is very similar to a drug addiction. I've read somewhere that the feeling of "Being in love" releases serotonin in the brain .. like an anti-depressent..your wife’s OM is a living, breathing, anti-depressant..and it's addictive..it's her addiction..

I've been where you are now..living life..day to day thinking "this is the absolute pitts." .. that sense of physical ache that starts from your stomach area and goes up into your lower chest each morning when you wake up .. that awful feeling before you put you're head on your pillow each night and you think "I don't know how much longer I can do this.." Although my FWW’s A was not as lengthy, I know how you feel. Your faith will help you along the way, but I’d suggest that you look at this clinically .. I don’t know how far along you are in the process .. I don’t know if you’ve exposed yet .. but if you haven’t .. there’s no good reason to delay. There’s nothing that I’ve read in your story thus far that supports delaying exposure. From where I see you .. I would suggest you expose if you havn’t done so already ..and start prepping for plan B .. You have options.

God be with you.

Counseling Session, Crisis Date 1/23/07 DDay:3mos,19days
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Met with MC today. Went over my list. I provided info which he well-noted. A few items of interest:

1- He understands my NC concern. My WW is deeply wrapped up in the A's aftermath given a 4-year EA/PA. She is honestly trying to break free from the emotional knots. I believe this. From what I've seen, she is not contacting OM now, but the OM went back on HIS word several times clear through 12/24 through V-texting. I have not seen any evidence since then. I told MC that if, upon my evidence of new contact from either OM or WW, I would be assured that the church leadership will take put OM on notice. If there is no acceptable response, BH (that's me) will bring down the hammer myself on the OM side. Then, let the chips fall. MC thinks that for me to do an exposure myself right now, given the delicate emotional situation, would likely be a major detriment (LB) and drive my WW further away. But he IS very much on board with an NC boundary.

2- I reiterated to the MC my love for my WW, but also stated my understanding of how tangled up emotions can be given the length of the EA/PA. I too was tangled emotionally having brought memories of my pre-M intimate relationship into our M. So, I can empathize (not rationalize). It took me 3-4 YEARS to shake off the active memories of the XGF and it was during this time the seeds of our M problems were planted unwittingly by me. In view of (1) and (2), I am approaching the A resolution carefully and without a "club" in my hand.

3- MC stated that his approach is really more directive with my WW than with me, so I should avoid generalizing his approach. Furthermore, he is planning on becoming more directive with her over the next few weeks. This is good.

4- MC wants me to work on meeting the ENs of my WW, even though it may seem like an uphill battle. Because it IS! Sounds like a Plan A approach of sorts.

5- Because my WWs issues are seemingly complex - distance from God - but attempting to reconcile, lack of satisfactiion with her past relationship with me, lingering EA entanglement with the OM, fear of the future not being any different, the "fog" of the matter, and her strong (but not 100%) withdrawal from me as her husband, a purely Nouthetic approach would be found lacking. Her spiritual antenna is broken. I know this sounds like rationalization, but there may be something to it. So, the MCs first objective is to help my WW understand and receive grace, then to responding to God's holiness and expectations for us as believers. He is far enough with her into the grace now, so he is ratcheting up the direct approach about the sin itself. Sort of like easing into Nouthetic so she is able to respond.

Is there a conflict with God's Word in the approach? Well, I can't say this now for sure. I don't think there is at this time. MC is aware of his responsibility to "read" our PERSONAL as well as marriage needs well, and apply then godly wisdom accordingly.

So as I now perceive it - the A occurred because of selfishness/sin of my WW and an opportunistic OM. But this also was a reaction, festering over time, to our fractured relationship which itself was an outcome of my sin of omission - not informing her - at the beginning - of my XGF-EA scars. I could have used counseling at that point but thought that just by "closing the chapter" with my XGF I could start fresh. Not quite.

So, there we have it - the gore and the pain. It seems that A's rarely happen out of the blue. There's responsibility enough to go around. No, the A was not MY fault, right? Or was it? SHE decided to....or did my emotional disconnect from her "propel" her towards the decision? Ah, the beam and the splinter....

Enough of that though. We must move ahead. I must rise to the challenges and be the man, husband, and father I ought to have been. I will watch the situation and be vigilant for me, and for her. My WW may come around or she may not. But I must press on in the face of the emotional vaccuum. Maybe, just maybe, a day at a time, my small contributions to the EN treasury will mount until the scale edges up and gains momentum.

Next meeting 1/25 - Both of us and the MC.

Counseling Session, Crisis Date 1/25/07 DDay:3mos,21days
********************************************************

Today's MC meeting was...well...alright. I think both WW and I are mellowing out. Me...I'm now accepting my culpability for laying the fractured foundation. While my WW has not verbalized her responsibiity for choosing the A as she did, I am more accepting of her emotional state. There really seems to be a sincere effort on her part to at least reach an understanding, then slowly begin the reconnection process. I'm prepared for a long haul here. There are some positives. She mentioned her interest in visiting some marriage websites. She has read a letter from a FWW who is part of this MB family, and I believe she may correspond. So, while there is no miracle yet, somehow I'm beginning to believe that she wants to move towards healing. We have a Tuesday dinner date to discuss basis life issues, the kids, etc. Truly, I walk by faith not by sight. If I walked by sight, I'd have to be put in a rubber room.

Till next time.

BH

******Counseling Sessions, Crisis date 2/6/07 DDay 4mos2days

It's been an interesting few weeks. My personal emotional roller coaster continues, but has stabilized much more. I have met with pastor/MC on several occasions and have stressed the importance of NC. They are aware of this too. Here's today's twist. The MC MET IN PERSON with the OP this past week (without my knowledge). The OP himself is dealing with issues (I'll bet...). He said he is considering "vanishing" (relocating)in order to help us move on, but he is also afraid of my WW's emotional breakdown if he does (like he should care). I told the MC that he NEEDS to vanish. As for my WW, her A was long enough that that the addiction will need a support system to come off of. Her detachment from me is significant enough that I am unable to fill the void at this time. The MC is aware of the implications of this and will be talking to our pastor about helping us connect with another couple -or at least accountability partners as individuals - to get us through the personal recovery phase.

We are not yet into marriage recovery because of my WWs betrayal and residual EA. Plus we have serious issues with TIME and job pressures. However, one small step at a time we are trying to re-connect. Easier for me, WAY hard for her. I am to forge ahead with small attempts at meeting her ENs in spite of the betrayal/anguish I live with daily. Maybe THIS is where real love must kick in - love which gives IN SPITE of not receiving, being vulnerable to hurt again.

Sort of re-defines tough love. Tough on the giver!

Well, on we go. Tomorrow my WW meets with the MC. I thank you for your interest and contribution to our thread!

Betrayed Hubby

Isn't it odd how just a little bit of success, or at least the feeling that things are moving forward, can keep a BS on task and "eager" to continue?

Tough love? Unconditional love? You'd have to think so. I just hope there's an astrick by the name of all BS's who stand at heaven's gate.

Good luck with your continued success, bh. I know from my own experience, the gains made are solely due to the efforts of the BS. You are doing just fine.

SD