Orchid,
I need your expert opinion. My husband is going on 7 months of the affair and is still angry at me. I think he thinks I am responsible for the affair. The OW has a lot to lose if he comes back- he has changed his total personality. I have known him for a long time since we were in our teens and I know he is a good person. What can I do to reach him? Is it too late? He is not willing to go to MC. If this doesn't work - I will be devestated and the plan I have if he doesn't come back is extremely different than the plan to keep on waiting for him. What else can I do? Plan B seems to make him closer to his OW and our friends have offered to call but I don't want him to be embarrased and I don't what he will say in his fog. There must be something I can do- I don't want to lose him especially to an OW that is not worthy of him. What else could I try? I believe if we went to MC we could clear up a lot of things. Please advise. Thank you.

If your friends want to help....why stop them? Embarrass the WS? They don't get embarrassed, they get mad.

Stop worrying and start protecting yourself. Be glad the WS isn't around to physically make you sick. Let the OW have the WS, you want your H back and when 2 selfish people have to meet each other's needs, it really can be a reality jolt.

So stop trying to prevent him from being hurt. As a WS, he loves pain.....does that make sense? <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/eek.gif" alt="" /> It shouldn't.

L.

sahmom,
Just a word if you would please!!!

Your statement about not wanting to embarrass the WS if his friends call, you can't stop that, that is not within your control. Let the friends call, a natural consequence of the WS's actions is his friends being concerned for him and his marriage. If they offer again to call him, encourage them to do so!!! Let him try to justify his affair to them, he can't!!! Another consequence of his actions!!

Hope that this makes sense to you!

Dawn