We have very little contact...Hes afraid of me yelling at him! Too bad.
LOL, I was where you were...Heck, I still want to yell. I've only been here a few weeks and can say that I've been improving. The advice you'll get here won't be easy, but its given if you want to save your M. If not, then yell away. Another book to purchase is POPW (power of a praying wife) its really good and is helping me stay calm when he's around. Its soooo hard to give and give to someone you truely love and all they want to do is mope around missing OP.
Learn how to let the small stuff go. You really need those books the other poster said and POPW.
If you want your H back, yelling is not going to make him want to be home, even though he is the cause. By yelling, in
his head he sees how he is justified in his wrong doing. It makes him feel less guilty, and the less he thinks about it the more he can go on doing wrong as if he has no heart. When the guilt does seep, all he has to do is think about you. He's telling you this is why he don't come home (listen). and he could be spreading half-truth and lies to anybody who will listen to him and they are helping him also by justifying his actions...they can be telling him too "do what makes him happy" instead of doing what is right.
How long do you wait? You have to come up with that figure on your own because you know how long you can stand. But dont make any decision until you are sure. You dont want this to be a back and forth thing on your part because then he will see you as wishy washy and know your threats arent real.
If you want to save your marriage, ask him to come home, and tell him you will try your hardest not to yell at him. Then go to MB website and read about Plan A/Plan B....Read Surviving an affair.
