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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 7,464
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Member
Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 7,464 |
ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Gotcha
Me: 56 (FBS) Wife: 55 (FWW)
D-Day August 2005
Married 11/1982 3 Sons 27,25,23
Empty Nesters.
Fully Recovered.
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 3,525
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Joined: Jul 2004
Posts: 3,525 |
People are 100% responsible for their own wickedness.
Period.
That applies across the board..no one persons behavior either caused or justified the others.
Cowards die many times before their deaths;
The valiant never taste of death but once ~Shakespeare
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 716
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Joined: Oct 2005
Posts: 716 |
I've made the point in His Needs, Her Needs: Building an Affair-proof Marriage that spouses usually have affairs because their emotional needs are not being met in the marriage. I could certainly understand someone reading this statement from Dr. W. Harley and coming to the conclusion that affairs are a direct result of unmet needs. Steve Harley will tell you that people have affairs because they are not protecting their weaknesses. Personally I go for a combination of the two. PK
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Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 1,320
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OP
Member
Joined: Jul 2005
Posts: 1,320 |
Somehow this thread got turned around.
People can debate who did what or why, blood being thicker than water, etc. In general, I would not have expected any one I know to agree that infidelity is an appropriate course of action, regardless of circumstance. In fact, I believe if I asked that direct question to them right now, they would say "Infidelity is wrong". The circumstances in their life may have prevented them from actively fighting against it, but certainly did not cause them to support it. Yet when faced with it, not only did they fail to object, they overtly (in some cases) and tacitly (in others) supported it.
Everyone I know got "on board" with "infidelity is okay given the right circumstances", which is a position I think is crazy.
Thus my question/vent.
Me 43 BH
MT 43 WW
Married 20 years, No Kids, 2 Difficult Cats
D-day July, 2005
4.5 False Recoveries
Me - recovered
The M - recovered
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