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Maybe Im just having a crappy week but ... I hope POSOMs kidneys fail


FBH 34 me,FWW 34,
DS 14, OC-D 12 (given up for adoption), DS-8, DD-5
D-Day#1 10-12-1998
D-Day#2 2-10-2008
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So now you move on to the Custody hearing Oct 4 where you are going for primary/full custody and "no contact" with POSOM????

Sounds like the judge is moving in that direction. Tape recording the kids saying they don't want to be with Dad is just so over the top. She's so buried herself. Only nutbags lose custody and she's giving the judge all she needs to shaft her and she's clueless about it. You say that woman was a college grad and, as I recall, has her MBA???? Wow.

Waywardism...not just your ordinary mental disorder. It's got a stupid stick component as well.

Mr. Wondering


FBH(me)-51 FWW-49 (MrsWondering)
DD19 DS 22 Dday-2005-Recovered

"agree to disagree" = Used when one wants to reject the objective reality of the situation and hopefully replace it with their own.
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And the custody hearing will be before this same judge, right?

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Originally Posted by MrWondering
So now you move on to the Custody hearing Oct 4 where you are going for primary/full custody and "no contact" with POSOM????

Full custody with supervised visitation if you can, would be my suggestion. Your WW sounds like a serious nutcase, and this may end up being very dangerous for your kids. You don't want to end up reading about them in the news...


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PSU, plz dude get a lawyer. He can shut this down asap. Plz do that.

One thing..when my xwh was spiraling downward and I got wind from my ds that he had been abusive in family home to ow/wife/wistress, I called an attny and began the process YOU are in right now.

Two hearings and voila..SOLE CUSTODY WITH SUPERVISED VISITATION AT MY DISCRETION, and only with me present or somebody I appoint.

And the judge even said for me NOT to let my child around xwh's parents too, and that he supported me on that (xwh dad is a serial cheater and had an affair with a teenager so I am on PERMANENT nc for live with them, and my son is too!). Of course I'd agreed on NC for life with them (the outlaws) also but well before I ever went to court, nice to hear the judge on my side.

Your ww IS DANGEROUS for your kids, and having her present into evidence tapes of the kids BEING INTERROGATED like they were enemy combatants or prisoners of war???? Plz make sure you get a lawyer so they can shut the evil, vile out of control scary alcoholic waywards down for good.

Plz. I don't care how you get the money, borrow it. But get that attorney and also ask that xww and her posom woman beater PAY FOR THE ATTNY COSTS. YOU will WIN this..you can, but you have to be able to know the courts inside and out and only a lawyer can do this. Plz get one. It will be a slam dunk.



Change happens by listening and then starting a dialogue with the people who are doing something you don't believe is right. ~Jane Goodall
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The judge may be p.o'd at your xww, and her angry outbursts, but I would seriously SUBMIT also into your next hearing her ability to fly into violent and beligerant fits at a moments' notice, which is ALSO bad for a mother to be able to do.

Our city has attny's here PSU, who specialize in mens' family law issues. Can you find one in your area? Can you?


Change happens by listening and then starting a dialogue with the people who are doing something you don't believe is right. ~Jane Goodall
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It sounds like your XWW is willing to go so far as to hang herself if it means painting you even 1cm of bad...


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

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Originally Posted by MrWondering
So now you move on to the Custody hearing Oct 4 where you are going for primary/full custody and "no contact" with POSOM????

Sounds like the judge is moving in that direction. Tape recording the kids saying they don't want to be with Dad is just so over the top. She's so buried herself. Only nutbags lose custody and she's giving the judge all she needs to shaft her and she's clueless about it. You say that woman was a college grad and, as I recall, has her MBA???? Wow.

Waywardism...not just your ordinary mental disorder. It's got a stupid stick component as well.

Mr. Wondering

You spoke too soon. I picked up the kids at school at 3:30. The principal told me the exWW and POSOM had just come by and demanded to speak to the kids. The principal told me exWW told the kids that they were going to Boys and Girls Club after school. DD6 cheered and said "YAY! B&G Club! I'm seeing daddy!"
The principal said he had a weird vibe about xWW and POSOM.

Anyways, the kids and I go home, we are watching a movie and waiting for my lady friend and her boy to come over for a night of pizza and X Box.

There's a knock at the door. It is a cop and a DFS worker. ExWW and POSOM went straight to the police station after they went to school and reported that I had molested DD6. So, I had to have my sister come get the kids, they opened up an investigation, and who knows where the kids will be Monday after school.

The cop and the DFS worker said XWW's story was pretty out there but they were following procedures. I gave them a copy of the PFA I filed last week, a copy of the dismissal of the PFA this afternoon, etc. The fun never ends!


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You'll need to be careful with this.

Even the implication that you could be a child molester (which obviously you are NOT) could be quite ruinous...


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
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She is starting to approach Pariah's XWW territory, seriously..


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
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I hope they do a thorough investigation, and as my WSIL, your XWW is found out to be the liar she is. I hope in this case, the children will be taken away from her. Seriously, I don't understand the WSs. Even when they have destroyed you by destroying your marriage, they need to take you down with them.

I hope everything works out for the good of those kids, cuz she isn't it.

In my WSIL's case, Child protective services found that SHE made her daughter say that her father abused her. WSIL was then investigated, and on probation with them.


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Originally Posted by karmasrose
You'll need to be careful with this.

Even the implication that you could be a child molester (which obviously you are NOT) could be quite ruinous...

I know. What I am worried about are the kids being placed into foster care next week while all the stuff is sorted out. My bigger worry is either POSOM or exWW actually did what they accused me of to try and get it pinned on me.


Me BH 49 WXW 50
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With POSOM being the way he is, I would not be surprised...

For that matter, your XWW...I wouldn't be surprised, either.


One year becomes two, two years becomes five, five becomes ten and before you know it, you've wasted your whole life on a problem you can't solve. That's one way to spend your life. -rwinger

I will not spend my life this way.
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Originally Posted by peachyisback
PSU, plz dude get a lawyer. He can shut this down asap. Plz do that.

One thing..when my xwh was spiraling downward and I got wind from my ds that he had been abusive in family home to ow/wife/wistress, I called an attny and began the process YOU are in right now.

Two hearings and voila..SOLE CUSTODY WITH SUPERVISED VISITATION AT MY DISCRETION, and only with me present or somebody I appoint.

And the judge even said for me NOT to let my child around xwh's parents too, and that he supported me on that (xwh dad is a serial cheater and had an affair with a teenager so I am on PERMANENT nc for live with them, and my son is too!). Of course I'd agreed on NC for life with them (the outlaws) also but well before I ever went to court, nice to hear the judge on my side.

Your ww IS DANGEROUS for your kids, and having her present into evidence tapes of the kids BEING INTERROGATED like they were enemy combatants or prisoners of war???? Plz make sure you get a lawyer so they can shut the evil, vile out of control scary alcoholic waywards down for good.

Plz. I don't care how you get the money, borrow it. But get that attorney and also ask that xww and her posom woman beater PAY FOR THE ATTNY COSTS. YOU will WIN this..you can, but you have to be able to know the courts inside and out and only a lawyer can do this. Plz get one. It will be a slam dunk.

Peachy - I do have a lawyer. He had another hearing today and that's why I was Pro Se for the protection order hearing today. Believe me, he knows what he is doing - he is also a volunteer Guardian ad Litem for the court as well.

I'm just running through scenarios here, gotta think positive so I have to go with her being blasted by DFS.

1. File a PFA against her on behalf of me and the kids for the various reasons already mentioned here as well as harrassment.

2. Investigate whether to pursue charges for filing a false police report

3. File ex Parte custody petition, ask for an emergency hearing on the ex Parte. Bring up all the evidence over the last couple of weeks or so. Ask for supervised visitation and mental health evaluation for exWW.

I have an appointment with my lawyer on Tuesday so we should know more about what our options are by then.


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This is alienation of affection, emotional abuse, and she's digging her own grave. This is terrible, PSUB.

My gut says you will get sole physical and legal custody since she has a track record now of filing false claim after false claim against you.

I honestly fear for your kid's wellbeing.

Best of luck, my friend. I will pray for you on the 4th.

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Since your children are young, you should be aware that they could have been molested by POSOM and then your XW gaslight them into thinking it was you... Just saying, evidence of molestation has been planted on children before by such a perp, and fathers have gone to jail, lost access to their children and still had to pay child support.

Be careful on this one.


Cafe Plan B link http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2182650&page=1

The ? that made recovery possible: "Which lovebuster do I do the most that hurts the worst"?

The statement that signaled my personal recovery and the turning point in our marriage recovery: "I don't need to be married that badly!"

If you're interested in saving your relationship, you'll work on it when it's convenient. If you're committed, you'll accept no excuses.
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I second Mr Ws opinion.

From what I hear from the bench, when the judge hears about this she will be toast.

Praying for you anyways and glad you got a lawyer PSU.

You allready knew it anyways, but this woman is so unstable, I think you should see if their is a way to keep an eye on them so they don't try to skip town. Of course the cops have to act on any calls like she claims, but I hope your lawyer has some way to monitor all this.

Does WXW have any past drug or mental illness issues PSU? Sorry not trying to worry you, she just sounds fried.


Me 56 Former BS
Widowed 5-17-09 --married 25 years.
4 children
DS-35 previous marriage--18-22 DGrandSons 6 and 4
Me former BS
DD-29 with DGDs 5 and 1yr
DSs 26 and 23
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Originally Posted by KaylaAndy
Since your children are young, you should be aware that they could have been molested by POSOM and then your XW gaslight them into thinking it was you... Just saying, evidence of molestation has been planted on children before by such a perp, and fathers have gone to jail, lost access to their children and still had to pay child support.

Be careful on this one.

I thought about this three years ago.


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Then you have to realize that if they have seen POSOM beat up your XW and yell at her, and that if he has threatened them into believing that he will kill her or you if they reveal what has really happened, and if she has systematically maligned you and told them stories about what you might have done to other children, that some psychological emotional transference could be at work to validate her claims against you.

You'd better do everything you can to refute, and protect your children from the evil that is in their mother's home, coming from POSOM and HER. Get a play therapist to get to the bottom of what's going on in your children's home NOW.


Cafe Plan B link http://forum.marriagebuilders.com/ubbt/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2182650&page=1

The ? that made recovery possible: "Which lovebuster do I do the most that hurts the worst"?

The statement that signaled my personal recovery and the turning point in our marriage recovery: "I don't need to be married that badly!"

If you're interested in saving your relationship, you'll work on it when it's convenient. If you're committed, you'll accept no excuses.
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Amen!!! And if your attny is too MEAK to do the hard, difficult work, then you need to get one who represents THE MALE FACTION and mens' family law rights.

Do get the child's therapist and also REQUEST FROM THE JUDGE THAT XWW HAVE A MENTAL EVALUATION due to all the fabricated stories, false legal filings, and danger she has put the children in.

If you can GET THIS, it is half the battle too. That way you PROVE her mentally unfit to be a parent. You prove that she made all this crap up.

Fwiw, my xwh's ow/wife shared with me that he had been dx with bipolar and also narcissism as she drug him into counseling. That combined with ONE OR TWO SENTENCES from my son saying he heard shouting upstairs, saw through a crack in the door him push her down/pull her hair, brought me into court IMMEDIATELY and I got an EMERGENCY MOTION two days later to have my child removed from their home. I also went to the court clerks' office and got ALL LEGAL AND POLICE records associated with their address and his name. I found out tons. Some little things, some big things. One thing I accidentally found was he had gotten arrested for driving OVER A HOT DOWNED WIRE after a thunderstorm. Their country road they lived on had big trees everywhere, and some had fallen down and hit the road also smashing some poles with live wires. When he was driving my son home from school, there were firemen everywhere trying to deal with the matter, and they told him "sir, it will be several hours until this is wrapped up, so you can't drive down this street until it is safe." He gave the firemen the finger (yea the finger..what a nice father!) and drove OVER THE WIRES with my son and his oc in the backseat. Police were immediately dispatched and he was arrested. Of course the kids weren't taken away though...(shame on my county!)

You NEVER KNOW WHAT YOU WILL FIND if you go to the court clerks' office and ask for ALL RECORDS pertaining to xww and to posom. Pay for them to be copied, read them, and give them to the lawyer. Know posom's date of birth btw.

After my discovery of that, and the cheating and unrest in my xwh's home, everything continued. Less than two months later (during this limbo time I did not allow my child in that home AT ALL despite xwh's pleas)I was back in court and got full custody with SUPERVISED VISITATION AT MY OWN DISCRETION and with myself or somebody I appoint present.

He can never challenge some of the stuff that came out in the final hearing. Not ever. So I nailed that cofffin SHUT.


Change happens by listening and then starting a dialogue with the people who are doing something you don't believe is right. ~Jane Goodall
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