ULTRAD,<P>Saw this post and read it after posting on your other thread. Have to say that not everyone knows that affairs are about emotions. Sex has a lot for many men's affairs, it is not surprising that your H feels this way. As I said before, please understand that your H is a human being and his need to get closer to God does not wipe away his weaknesses. <P>I know you are angry that he is having a difficult time dealing with this and forgiving you, but please understand one thing. You chose to have the affair and you chose to end it. He had no part of those decisions. You made them for yourself. He is left to deal with it and it does take time. All of this is further complicated because apparently members of the church know of the affair and are actively involved with the reconciliation process. This puts any decisions he makes under a microscope. If he forgive you he may be viewed as weak or at fault for the affair. If he does not he is viewed as unloving and a hard man. However, the bible does say that divorce is an option in the case of infidelity. <P>I am not advocating he do such a thing, but it is much easier for us here to see your point of view and help. We are not in your H's public situation and we are not emotionally attached to you. Please consider the whole picture. We will help you as much as possible but remember he has a right to feel hurt, angry, depressed, and full of doubt about himself. But you can help him, it will take time, care and surely counceling if you can find the correct councelor. That may not be easy. It should certainly be someone that the congregation does not know in my opinion. Your H has too much to deal with as it is.<P>God Bless You and Your family
