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#402579 09/28/00 11:20 PM
Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 12
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MUDD Offline OP
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Joined: Sep 2000
Posts: 12
Hi again.<P>What a day it has been. it went from bad to worse. My H said that he was going to go out and have a fling to get even with me. He came home drunker than drunk. i am surprised that he made it alive. Anyway, he didn't go and have his fling, he went to the OM's to check out my story. He won't tell me what the OM told him. All that he will say is that the two stories are completly different. They were different from the start. He confronted him when he first found out and there was only one time that anything happened. The OM told him that it was 3 or 4 times. I want to call the OM to find out what he told him, but I don't think that that is a good idea. My H wants me to take a polygraph test to show that I am telling him the truth. I don't have a problem with that, but I am starting to wonder if this will ever get better. He keeps telling me to go back over there, that that is where I belong. He says this when he is sober too. I haven't seen the OM in over 4 years, and that isn't a place that I ever want to go again. I am trying real hard not to get upset when my H talks this way, but it is hard at times. I love my H and our children with all of my heart. I want this marriage to work, but if he is going to go back and ask the OM everytime I tell him something to see if it is the way it happened is there a chance of things working out? <P>Thanks for listening.<P>Jill

#402580 09/29/00 12:07 AM
Joined: Jul 1999
Posts: 1,526
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Mudd,<P>I'm so sorry for the pain you are in. I know it's hard right now, as you say it ended 4 years ago for you. For H it is new. Please try to remember that. <P>I can tell you I gave my h h&## for a very long time after d-day. The pain, shock and anger he feels are normal. And it is fresh. An open wound so to speak. Please try to be paitent. <P>Your h's threats to have a fling are wrong, I'm sorry he is saying that. Two wrongs will not make a right here. Does he have anyone to talk to about this ? Someone who believes in trying to save and rebuild marriages after affairs ? If not you may want to tell him about this place. He needs an outlet for the anger and the hurt. Are you two in counseling ? If not I suggest you go. If you can't afford it, try some of the churchs in your area, may pators do counseling in these situations.<P>------------------<BR>Deb<P>Hepatitis C, Please educate yourself ! <A HREF="http://www.hepatitis-central.com/<P>In" TARGET=_blank>http://www.hepatitis-central.com/<P>In</A> memory of a very dear friend <A HREF="http://fathom.org/teemingmillions/wally.adp" TARGET=_blank>http://fathom.org/teemingmillions/wally.adp</A><p>[This message has been edited by Bozos_ Deb (edited September 29, 2000).]


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