I am devistated, I just found out yesterday that my H has a SA. He confessed everything to me yesterday and I haven't stopped crying yet. I had found out about an A back in May and was dealing with that, but now a SA. I just don't know what to do, where to turn. I am so lost! Does the WS ever get over a SA?

I have 3 children, I can live like this anymore! I am so scared to get a disease from him. He says he was safe, but who really knows!

Can anyone help?

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by ConfusedButHopeful:
<strong>I am devistated, I just found out yesterday that my H has a SA. He confessed everything to me yesterday and I haven't stopped crying yet. I had found out about an A back in May and was dealing with that, but now a SA. I just don't know what to do, where to turn. I am so lost! Does the WS ever get over a SA?

I have 3 children, I can live like this anymore! I am so scared to get a disease from him. He says he was safe, but who really knows!

Can anyone help?</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Hey there....CBH.... I'm so sorry. Yes there is hope, yes you can recover, and yes there is help.

I don't know if you know me or any of my posts, but my H is an SA also. A very sucessfully recovering SA. We've been through more than I can tell you in one post, but what I really want is to offer my help.

I do marriage coaching with Harley principles and concepts. My special area of interest... due no doubt to my history <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" /> ... is sexual addicition. How would you feel about emailing me and we could talk about how I could help you guys through this? I would be happy to volunteer my time to help you out.

Cerri

Hi Cerri -

Thank you so much for responding, and giving me a shimmer of hope. I would love to talk with you further, I need to understand this. I have done so much reading on infidelity and relationships, but I just don't know where to begin with addictions.

I know he is not a bad person and I see he is hurting. I still love him very much, but I just don't know how to get through this.

I always said that I would walk right out of a relationship if a person did a fraction of the things he has done to me. I just can't do it though. I just want my marriage, for me and for my children. We get along so well lately and he just keeps dropping the bomb on me with all this hurtful info. I guess I should be looking at he ability to finally be honest with me as a good sign, but it is SO painful!

I am scared also. Another one of his friends has just received D papers and then tried to kill himself on NYE. Thank God he was not successful. I know he is deeply depressed and I am scared he might try the same.

Where does one begin to recover from this and begin to trust again?

I would love to get some incite from you. I need to learn as much as possible no matter what direction my marriage is going.

Thank you so much again!

CBH...

Go to the library, or if you don't have one close by, order from amazon any of Patrick Carnes books. He is one of if not THE foremost expert on SA.

If you search online there are some other resources as well. A lot of good info. I thought I had some bookmarked but I can't seem to find them.... I'll keep looking.

My email is info@lifeworks-coaching.net

C

Here's Carnes online info....

http://www.sexhelp.com/

I am not feeling much hope today. We separated last night.

There was a big blow up with me, him and the OW on Sunday night. Well, after it was all over and ALL the truth was out because I made him tell her everything in front on her. All the lies were out. Needless to say it was very ugly and emotional. We all agreed that the me and the OW would have no further contact with each other. I was fine with that since all I wanted was the truth out in the open.

Well, my H just called me to tell me that OW has put an Order of Protection against ME!!! Can you believe this! The nerve, all I was trying to do was get the truth out so that no one would be hurt further and SHE puts an Order against ME! She is knowingly with a MM and she feels that she is in the right to go against me! Like I need any more drama in my life right now.

I just don't know what to do anymore. I really feel like my life is hopeless right now - and I still have 3 children that need me to be strong so I can't even have a break down if I wanted to!

Someone please tell me when the drama stops! I can't take it anymore!

Emailed you....

C