IS there ever a time when others should put us first? <P>The last two weeks have been a real trial for me, personally. I've had a death in the family, broke a tooth, tooth absessed, ended up with a strep-type infection from the absessed tooth, OD'd on pain killers - due to accidental mis-perscription - lack of communication between the Dr. and the Pharmacist - and I just plain didn't understand the perscription, extra family in town due to funeral, car broke down, and h came over and threw a fit about having to pay kids medical bills when he didn't decide to take them to the Dr. (Ins. was in HIS name)<P>I wasn't asking for much - just someone to drive me to the Dentist's office - so I wasn't driving after having a tooth pulled - on heavy medication. My daughter got upset because my Mom was controlling everything and had to drive me - then she comes and tells me she and a friend are going to go do some errands while I'm in the dentist's office - and I can wait there until they come back. <P>I told her she could STAY HOME I WOULD DRIVE MYSELF. I feel exhausted - and SO alone. AND I was accused by the friend of being selfish. I suggested she go home and NEVER come back to my house. My daughter is 16 but most of our fights have been over this friend - I just don't feel she's a necessary part of our lives.

Jan,<P>Go with your gut on this one, and do not let that girl anywhere near your D. You ought to trust that finely honed trouble antennae that you've got. I find it very suspicious that they were upset about your mom driving (is that what you were saying - wasn't sure), <B>they were planning something together!</B> What is selfish is that your daughter would try and take advantage of your incapacity.<P>I was stupid enough to try and accept ALL of my daughter's friends - THAT IS NAIVE!! She will corrupt your daughter with all the bad characteristics that you already don't like.<P>Jan, go get the book Safe People by townsend and cloud. It takes a close look at the traits that people have that attract unsafe people. I saw myself there, and you may see yourself as well. By not trusting your gut feelings about this girl, you may be succumbing to all the tools you used previously to deny the evil that exists in people, which helped to bring those people to you, and allowed them to hurt you.<P>Anyway, I'd better get off my soapbox, before I get the humble"pie" award. Or was it fish? I do get my foods confused!<P>Anne<P>

D decided to go with me - without friend to get my tooth pulled - then found out the dentist is sick. D ask why our car is using so much gas now - and I explained that when you are constantly 'going somewhere' it costs money - and that if she didn't back off she was going to loose priviledge of driving.<P>She decided to discuss with me where she is going after work - instead of just going. SHe's always been very trustworthy. I did tell her that girl will be nowhere near my vehicle or HER again. <P>I went with my instincts about that girl. She is NOT to be around here anymore.<BR>

I think my biggest problem at the moment is that I feel like I've been giving to everyone else - not taking care of me - and no one else seems to be taking care of me either. I was feeling a bit left out of the loop. A lot left out of the loop.<P>Maybe just left out all together. Time for a pity party maybe - some chocolate bonbons and expensive coffee's being ordered as we speak