It's been awhile since I've been here. During that time my husband has moved out and i have very little contact with him. Yesterday was very difficult as it was the first Holiday without him. I've tried being extremely loving and understanding and that doesnot work. I've thought about completely cutting him out of my life in an attempt to move on but I can't seem to be able to do this. I still love him very much and for some reason that I can not explain I get the feeling that its not over. Has anyone else been in the position where the marriage is all but over to find that your spouse suddenly changes their mind and you work towards rebuilding the relationship. I have been praying for the healing of this marriage for almost three years ( it took him two and one half years to finally move out) and things only seem to get worse not better so at times i have a real crisis in faith as it is hard to continue to believe when you see things going done hill ( exactly the opposite of what you are praying for)

Pat

Hello... You sound so discouraged. I don't know your full story but to a point, I can relate. I'm sorry that you're going through this "dark night of the soul".

Unfortunately, we don't have the power to change anyone's mind. The thing we can do is change our own self... and in that, we change the circumstances in which the spouse is living and maybe, maybe, maybe, they'll find something appealing about it. But never if you're not emotionally healthy... it will be too much of a reminder that there is pain and many people avoid it.

Give yourself a break now though... the holiday season is hard on all of us going through these situations. It's going to be a tough couple of weeks... but there will be light at the end of the tunnel.

You have a choice... to move on yourself. You can't look to your H in order to do that... you have to have it in yourself.

I don't know about you, but I can't do it alone. That's where my faith comes in. Christ enables me to make it one day at a time.

Take care!