What has anyone done here anything that works? The concepts here are great but who's made some real gains in ending affairs/restoring their marriages?

Well, you're on the divorcing/divorced board so don't take most of our advice! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

It's a holiday weekend so it might be slow, but I would post this on the recovery board also - those folks are making things work in real life in real time....

Most of us are still working on things.... but over there they did make changes.

It's the whole program too - not just picking a concept or two out and doing those...

<small>[ August 30, 2004, 10:06 PM: Message edited by: laura_lee ]</small>

Thanks Laura, I need encouragement for the whole process, even if it ends in D. This is early for me so I have hope, but the advice you gave will help regarless of outcome.

Thanks for your words and peace filled spirit.

dlc

Yes, I have to echo "justthewife's" sentiments. I didn't used to hang out here in D/D board too much when it was still early in my journey.

It was way too painful to hear so many who ended up Div'd when that wasn't my objective. That it happened anyway wasn't germaine to my mindset. I simply couldn't bear to be here and hear all the hurt and anguish at the time. It just hit too close to home.

Mainly, I hung around GQII, and Recovery. GQII gave me the general knowledge I craved, showed me what steps I would be going through so I was prepared for everything, and Recovery was full of upbeat, positive stories of restored M's!

Of course, I hung out in Prayer Requests a lot, too, but that requires a certain "belief system."

Time. Time is truly your best ally. Just give yourself time. Orchid used to post the 5 stages of grieving quite frequently. They apply to the "death" of your M as well as the physical death of a person in your life. That helped me identify where I was along the pathway of recovery for my own heart and soul.

Plan on approx. a year to feel "whole" again. I posted a lot, and read a lot more. Knowledge is power.

God Bless,

bmp