Two weeks ago, our MC told me to type up or write down all that I need from mr. T and it's hard for me to put into words what I "need" from him because at this point, anything he's doing is "not good enough" or "good enough" depending on my mood swing! <p>I know this is just another area I have to wade through before I really settle down...<p>Most likely I will print the EN questionnaire off this site and fill it in and share with our MC about that.<p>I never really thoguht about what I "needed" from Mr. "T"....as what he was doing before he even had his TNS with OW was fine....all the needs were met...I guess what my biggest hurdle is the emotional "disconnection" he did while trying to keep it from me until it was a better time to find out...our "connection" is severed and it is rough trying to re-connect after 3 years...<p>Did any of you experience what I'm trying to ask? How did you re-connect? It's hard for us to go out and "stare" at each other at times....we have four children, no child care and all our family is scattered all over the U.S.<p>Any ideas....situations, what works for you would be appreciated....I hope I make sense with this post as I'm nursing my last *gasp* diet coke....<p>Hugs,
Twiisty<p>[ February 18, 2002: Message edited by: twiisty ]</p>

T,<p>I wrote this long reply and got booted by Aol. I have to go but I'll reply again later if I don't chat with you before.<p>Tee

Twiisty,<p>I know exactly what you both need... how does a week long romantic vacation sound, just you and h? Maybe that is not likely right now, but just a suggestion. <p>Sometimes when things are kind of rocky here, good old fashioned romance ( i won't give details) is an easy cure.<p>What I would tell the MC is just what you pointed out, that you still feel disconnected from him and maybe the MC can offer suggestions. <p>We, too, have our counseling session tomorrow. They have been going well lately. Since we go to our church for counseling, it is geared more towards growing in the Lord first, studying what God has to say about marriage, and then help aids, books to read that compliment the reconciliation process.<p>Do you go to secular counseling or is it through the church? <p>Maybe you and h can set some time (whether its 15 minutes or 30 minutes)each day or every other day or even every Wed or Sun, whatever... where you both sit down at the table with the Bible and study one passage that discusses marriage and then share what each other thinks about it. H and I do this, whether we are laying in bed, at the table, or even when we go out to a restaraunt. This is probably easier to do when you don't have 4 children, but it is a blessing if you can find the time. <p>...kind of got off the track of your post, but wanted to reply anyway.<p>Love, Julia