Marriage Builders®
Posted By: Paralee Should I continue this relationship? - 03/04/09 04:07 AM
I'm 48 years old and have never been married. About a year ago I met a man through the internet who is 53 years old and has also never been married. We corresponded for a while, then exchanged phone numbers and talked for a while. At Christmas he traveled to my home and spent a week visiting with me. The problem is that he lives in Quebec and I live in Florida, which severely limits the amount of time that we can spend together. He says that he loves me and wants to be married. I'm not sure how I feel, I don't feel that we've spent enough time together to get to know one another, and don't really see how this can work out. Right now I don't feel "in love". Should I continue to pursue this? Sometimes I feel that it probably isn't fair to him to keep letting him think that it might work out when I have such doubts. Other times I think maybe I should just go ahead and agree to marry him, hoping that I'll fall in love later. I'm confused, and feel like a dope for letting things come to this.

Thanks,
Susan
Posted By: Bellevue Re: Should I continue this relationship? - 03/04/09 07:51 PM
Hi Susan, Just throwing out my opinion:

I don't believe either of you seriously want to be married. If you did, you'd have found people reasonably close to where you are living.

I'd also be leery of a man who after spending one week with you says he wants to marry you.
Posted By: Paralee Re: Should I continue this relationship? - 03/05/09 02:11 AM
I do want to be married, but I have a hard time meeting and getting to know men for some reason. My last relationship ended rather badly, and it's been a while since I've even wanted to try. And yes, I am leery of someone who says he is in love with me after a one week visit. He is not pressuring me at all, just letting me know that he is ready when I am. I'm trying to decide whether to keep pursuing this, hoping I will eventually feel "in love" or give it up now and wait for someone else. I'm leaning toward the latter.
Posted By: catperson Re: Should I continue this relationship? - 03/06/09 01:48 PM
Just be completely honest with him. If he really does love you, he'd understand and wait. Heck, if he really loved you, he'd be moving to Florida.
Posted By: Paralee Re: Should I continue this relationship? - 03/07/09 12:18 AM
If he had offered to move to Florida ... I'm not sure whether I would have said yes or tried to talk him out of it. \:\)
Posted By: Lisa11 Re: Should I continue this relationship? - 03/07/09 10:40 AM
I'm trying to decide whether to keep pursuing this, hoping I will eventually feel "in love" or give it up now and wait for someone else. I'm leaning toward the latter.

Lisa11
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