My Son Has Run Away--Please Keep Him in Your Prayers! - 12/07/04 07:24 AM
Fellow MB-ers and old friends,
It's late and this is the quickest way I know of to let you all know--I very much need your prayers. Actually, not so much me, but my son needs your prayers.
He has recently (within the last two months or so) fallen into a bad crowd at school, and he was skipping out of class and not doing his homework. Well...for several weeks he was able to hide this from me by deleting the messages from the school attendance and teachers, etc., but this last Wednesday I found out. I spoke with the school, spoke with the teachers and got the whole scoop. WOW!
Okay, my son has never been a perfect kid--he's not a great student because he's ADHD and needs some special adjustments...but still!! We basically had the understanding between us that he had to really be trying his best (putting forth his best effort), and if he still didn't have a great grade I understood. A lot of teachers have so many kids in their class, they don't feel like or understand how to deal with a kid with ADHD, so we constantly struggle with this. Hey, we count it a great success if he brings the right homework home, works on it, gets it to school, and gets it turned it!!!!
Anyway, so since he has been skipping school and not doing his homework (and consequently had failing grades for the semester), I told him that this was NOT going to continue...that if he was not going to go to classes, that he was not going to go to school and fool around with kids who were encouraging him in his irresponsibility, etc. I mean, he makes his own choices, but it's harder to make a choice for HIGH MORAL CHARACTER when you surround yourself with people who smoke, drink, flunk, skip out, and blame the "pigs"!
He was mad about it all weekend, giving me the attitude: "FINE!! I won't EVER be able to have ANY MORE FUN!!" and that kind of Oh-Poor-Me stuff. I don't think he understands yet that his choice to skip class affects not only him, but also his sister and I--and his dad too I suppose. I see little or no responsibility in his behavior, and I doubt if he realizes that his whole future is also affected by his choices now. But that's the way 18yo's are.
I feel like I have been a good mom to him, bringing him up right, making sure he's cared for and provided for, and teaching him by example and words how to be angry appropriately, etc. It feels to me as if he made some EXTREMELY poor choices, and when I laid down the law and gave him some consequences, rather than admit his error, he chose to run from them and make even MORE bad choices.
Please pray for him to realize what he's doing, and please pray for me to continue to allow him to experience the consequences of his actions. SH1T!! I was hoping he would make better decisions! Now, I need to be strong and let him get in trouble for making these crummy decisions!!! AARRGGHH!!!! <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />
I'll be looking for him all day tomorrow and probably calling the police. Keep us in your thoughts and prayers.
CJ
It's late and this is the quickest way I know of to let you all know--I very much need your prayers. Actually, not so much me, but my son needs your prayers.
He has recently (within the last two months or so) fallen into a bad crowd at school, and he was skipping out of class and not doing his homework. Well...for several weeks he was able to hide this from me by deleting the messages from the school attendance and teachers, etc., but this last Wednesday I found out. I spoke with the school, spoke with the teachers and got the whole scoop. WOW!
Okay, my son has never been a perfect kid--he's not a great student because he's ADHD and needs some special adjustments...but still!! We basically had the understanding between us that he had to really be trying his best (putting forth his best effort), and if he still didn't have a great grade I understood. A lot of teachers have so many kids in their class, they don't feel like or understand how to deal with a kid with ADHD, so we constantly struggle with this. Hey, we count it a great success if he brings the right homework home, works on it, gets it to school, and gets it turned it!!!!
Anyway, so since he has been skipping school and not doing his homework (and consequently had failing grades for the semester), I told him that this was NOT going to continue...that if he was not going to go to classes, that he was not going to go to school and fool around with kids who were encouraging him in his irresponsibility, etc. I mean, he makes his own choices, but it's harder to make a choice for HIGH MORAL CHARACTER when you surround yourself with people who smoke, drink, flunk, skip out, and blame the "pigs"!
He was mad about it all weekend, giving me the attitude: "FINE!! I won't EVER be able to have ANY MORE FUN!!" and that kind of Oh-Poor-Me stuff. I don't think he understands yet that his choice to skip class affects not only him, but also his sister and I--and his dad too I suppose. I see little or no responsibility in his behavior, and I doubt if he realizes that his whole future is also affected by his choices now. But that's the way 18yo's are.
I feel like I have been a good mom to him, bringing him up right, making sure he's cared for and provided for, and teaching him by example and words how to be angry appropriately, etc. It feels to me as if he made some EXTREMELY poor choices, and when I laid down the law and gave him some consequences, rather than admit his error, he chose to run from them and make even MORE bad choices.
Please pray for him to realize what he's doing, and please pray for me to continue to allow him to experience the consequences of his actions. SH1T!! I was hoping he would make better decisions! Now, I need to be strong and let him get in trouble for making these crummy decisions!!! AARRGGHH!!!! <img border="0" alt="[Teary]" title="" src="graemlins/teary.gif" />
I'll be looking for him all day tomorrow and probably calling the police. Keep us in your thoughts and prayers.
CJ