Mean to my child - 06/12/06 04:44 PM
I don't know how to solve this problem,and my marriage is in deep trouble because of it- it's almost to the point where I'm going to leave because I feel I have to save my child. I've even been looking at homes to rent.
We've been married 6 years. He has no children from his previous marriages. I have two daughters now ages 11 and 14 from my previous marriage. My husband openly favors my 11 year old, and is hugely critical of my 14 year old. Both are good kids. Good grades, no trouble, active at school and in sports. My 14 year old is an extremely pretty girl who for some reason, has terrible self-esteem problems. He compounds them with phrases like "no wonder you don't have any friends", call her a liar, says she has "behavior problems" and is constantly picking on every little thing she does wrong, like not cleaning her room or leaving a spoon upstairs in their play room. I could go on and on. She now practically hates my husband. It seems every time he yells at her or doles out some sort of discipline, I get a knife stuck in my heart and I feel more dead that I did before. I defend her alot because I don't feel what he has done is justified, and then I get yelled at for defending her and not standing by him. We are living like roommates now because I have withdrawn almost completely from him. Is this marriage salvageable?
It's hard to have feelings anymore other than hurt and resentment. There are other problems as well, but this is the main issue. I feel I have to put my children first.
Any advice?
We've been married 6 years. He has no children from his previous marriages. I have two daughters now ages 11 and 14 from my previous marriage. My husband openly favors my 11 year old, and is hugely critical of my 14 year old. Both are good kids. Good grades, no trouble, active at school and in sports. My 14 year old is an extremely pretty girl who for some reason, has terrible self-esteem problems. He compounds them with phrases like "no wonder you don't have any friends", call her a liar, says she has "behavior problems" and is constantly picking on every little thing she does wrong, like not cleaning her room or leaving a spoon upstairs in their play room. I could go on and on. She now practically hates my husband. It seems every time he yells at her or doles out some sort of discipline, I get a knife stuck in my heart and I feel more dead that I did before. I defend her alot because I don't feel what he has done is justified, and then I get yelled at for defending her and not standing by him. We are living like roommates now because I have withdrawn almost completely from him. Is this marriage salvageable?
It's hard to have feelings anymore other than hurt and resentment. There are other problems as well, but this is the main issue. I feel I have to put my children first.
Any advice?