It was hard enough knowing that my kids were having dinner at H's house Sat. night and then celebrating Easter, but to add to my stress, Juluwitch sent an Easter cake for me to bring to my in-laws (H had to work so they weren't going)! She thought nothing of sending the cake home with my kids so we could bring with us on Sunday! If that's not bad enough, I called my H yesterday and told him that I didn't want them sending things through me and I wouldn't do that anymore....his response....WHY, WHAT'S THE PROBLEM!!! OMG...I am surprised I didn't lose it on the phone, but I held it together and told him that I will not be responsible for bringing their "stuff" anywhere. If they have something that needs to be transported, they can bring it to his parents and they can take it. He was not happy with that and let me know! I didn't relent though (I was quite proud of myself!!)I told him that if it happens again, I will throw it in the trash then I said my goodbyes.

I've come a long way baby!! Last year, I probably would have cried to all of you here and not said a thing to him about it. Now, I have learned not hold these things in because they will just keep happening. Thanks to everyone who has helped me get to this point!!
BH

Way to go! Her gall and inappropriate behavior never cease to amaze me. And you are right to challenge her, otherwise, it will just continue. Much better to demand that she correct her outrageous behavior than to sit and suffer in silence.

bh,

Way to go!!!Put that armour on and go for it!!!!You have gained so much strength!!!!

Juluwitch!!! I love it!!!! You will have to go to DD and look for my update on kids weekend!!!

OD says dad and stepmom are coming for graduation. I have mixed feelings on that. I want her to see all of what we had, it took a long time, 21 years but I wasn't going to the bottom, I figure that is where he belonged for doing this to his family, but then I hope they don't get the idea, to try and take me back to court.

You haven't come up with a name for OW (Other wife) I thought about introducing her that way when they are here. "Yes this is my husband's wife Celia." What do you think!!!!!

Dawn <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

<small>[ April 23, 2003, 05:30 PM: Message edited by: daybreak ]</small>

Hello ladies,

BH, Julie is so pathetic. You did great!

Do you realize that you ladies are coming to the point that you can find humor in these messes? Maybe it is because you are beginning to see that these wayward people are not worth raising your blood pressure over - at least for long - like you used to.

Seriously, though, I do have concerns that the children of WS and OP will gradually not see the behavior as such a bad thing. Sad.

Your victory is in your honorable behavior. Remember that you cannot change them. You can just change your reaction to them. And you have! Keep it up. I'm proud of you.

Estes

I might be a little too reactionary to OW's, but --- Why didn't you throw it in the trash?

Maybe that would be too much? YOu could just return it, I would of never brought it over- You are a better woman than I. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Hugs, H

<small>[ April 24, 2003, 05:50 PM: Message edited by: Honey ]</small>

Honey .... YOU read my mind! I thought, "Throw the damn cake in the trash!." ..... or ...."Turn it into an *upside-down* cake ..... then mail it back to Julie." (wih a thank-you note, of course)...... oops.

Evidently she's a better woman than I am too!

<img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> Pep

<small>[ April 24, 2003, 07:25 PM: Message edited by: Pepperband ]</small>

</font><blockquote><font size="1" face="Verdana, Arial">quote:</font><hr /><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Originally posted by brokenhearted:
<strong>.....I told him that if it happens again, I will throw it in the trash then I said my goodbyes. ..............
BH</strong></font><hr /></blockquote><font size="2" face="Verdana, Arial">Well BH, we know what you will do the next time. Might I add to that suggestion of instead of throwing it away, that you grow it?

Hm...... set said piece of supposedly edible eats under an aluminum lid placed in the far corner of the yard, let it bake in the sun for 2 - 4 days..... let it get nice and GREEN <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> then return it with the gasp, that you just could not deliver something so hideous. Like as if she gave it to you in that condition. If you can hurry up the 'special effects', it might have a greater impact. LOL!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

Then again, it might already come all moldied out! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

BH, you are a good person. As you can see, I would want to share my pain!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

Hugz,
L.

Hi Everyone..thanks for the responses!

ML - What really gets me on this one is that it was supposedly my husband's idea to send it up here! I guess bizarro behavior is contagiuos!!Now that he has been warned...the next time it will be in the trash!

Dawn - Thank you my dear!! I love the introduction line for Celia!! I've been thinking about a "cute" name for her. How about Cruelia (you know.. kind of a twist on Cruella and Celia!) I know...I know...I'll keep on thinking!! LOL!! I have to go through a graduation too in a month or so (sometime in June). My daughter who lives with them is graduating and I will be seeing them together at the graduation so I know just how you are feeling!

Dear Estes...thank you so much! I'm so glad that I have gotten to the point that I can have a sense of humor again! Thanks to people like ML, Orchid, Dawn, Pepper and so many others, I have found that sense of humor again! It feels great to be able to see a little humor in spite of all the sadness. It concerns me as well that the lessons the children are learning are inappropriate. My kids are older but I still see that they are accepting things as they are and it blows my mind! My 19 year old went to the Aquarium with H and OW and her kids the other day just like it was an ordinary family outing!! It broke my heart. Fortunately she had a terrible time because it did feel very awkward and she was uncomfortable most of the time. I guess even though she is trying to be there for her Dad, she does know that what they are doing is wrong. Thanks Estes...I hope you and your son are doing well.

Honey & Pepper - Believe me...I thought about throwing that thing in the trash! I honestly don't know why I didn't! I made my daughter bring it out the car (she had brought it in the house and put in the kitchen) and told her I didn't want it in the house. For some reason my kids didn't understand even that reaction to the cake! So I guess that is probably what stopped me from doing anything drastic. But now that everyone has been warned....the next time they send anything up here...it is going right in the trash!

Orchid - LOL!! I love it!! It was a cake in the shape of a lamb so the green fuzz would look pretty funky around it!!

Thanks again and hugs to all!
BH

I'm so mean that I'd be tempted to return the thing after it had been eaten. The gall of some people ever ceases to amaze me...