Well... I thought i would start a new post in order to not have so much old baggage on with this thread.....

It is interesting how God allows us to go through these challenges and the lessons that He wants us to learn. Things as simple as putting and filling the other persons EN regardless if your own are being filled.... for anyone that has read any of my threads... my road has not been an easy one... I have been praying and working with different techniques for years now and have seem glimpses of something amazing and the potential that could have been, but right now I believe that God is working to strengthen me to allow Him to fill all my needs. I went and saw an attorney yesterday... and let me just say... anyone who thinks leaving is the easier thing to do... YOU ARE CRAZY!!!!! Going, sitting, and talking with a "professional" was the worst feeling ever! It made me realize though i am never alone... I am going onto a new path where many times i will feel alone. I know that God can still turn this mess around and that He can change my heart.... but at the same time... I am not going to sit and hold my breath any longer.

I do not recommend this road for anyone... please search and seek all other avenues and ponder what it is in you that must be changed.... The only person you can change is yourself....

I pray that each of you is filled with a sense of gratitude, true happiness, gratefulness and learn that you must forgive for you not for others... I pray that each of you will feel and sense a miracle take place within your circumstances and that God will use the pain and turmoil each of you have faced to help others in the future.

May God bless each of you!
LIC

LIC,

Thank you for giving us the update. Keep us informed. Many of us here care.

I know that the decision you have come to was not an easy one and that you would still desire reconciliation if it were really possible.

Your heart is not the only one that needs changing, IMO.

And FWIW, I'm still proud of you... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Mark

thank you so much Mark... You will never know how much that means to me! LIC

{{{LostInChrist}}}

I don't know your whole story but I have read a few of your posts.

I had to walk that road too... D wasn't what I wanted, but it was what I had to do.

I'm hopeful at this point that *maybe* reconciliation is possible - it is for me, and time will tell if it's an option for my XH... but I'm working on it.

There *are* lessons in everything - hold tight to that.

In loving support,

JinGA

LIC,


None of us knows your whole story, and even if we had read all your posts we still wouldn't know. Only God knows and I applaud you for searching for His guidance.

I'll keep praying for you even if I can't post much.

Ace

Ace,

Do you EVER sleep?

LIC,

I got to see God at work last night.
Hearts that once were broken were healed.
Friendships once damaged by hurt and resentment were restored.
Healing did not come easily, but only by tears and honesty and much prayer.

See Isaiah 57:14-19.
Read Psalm 102:1-12 again.

In continued prayer for you,

Mark

Mark, you asked:



Actually, I have a recliner in my office....a trigger because as I was moving it in, my WH was beginning his phone contact with that OW. But I dumped the trigger (remember that thread? It really helped me!) and kept the recliner....and I rest in it occasionally during the day, especially when I'm working 14 hour days. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/blush.gif" alt="" />

Sometimes I post late at night and often early in the morning and because I live in a different time zone, it may seem like I never sleep.

Awwww....perceptions (and mis-perceptions)! They'll lie to you every time.

***

LIC,

How are you? I notice you seldom post on the week-ends so it may be awhile before you read this.

I'm praying for you to have the wisdom of Solomon and the patience of Job. May your decisions become the foundation for building the rest of your life.

Ace

Ace,

I wish I had a job where I could sleep while getting paid.

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/grin.gif" alt="" />

Mark

Mark, I answered your thread jack sleep question on the Recovery Forum.

LIC, sorry for the fishing man's thread jack...sometimes he just has no manners. <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/rolleyes.gif" alt="" /> Hope you have/had a good weekend.

Ace

Mark and Ace,
Thanks for checking up on me! This weekend was pretty hard. H asked that I be out by next weekend and he went and shared with his family this weekend that I have decided to leave him..... The things that we have to go through are not easy.... and of course his family doesn't even know half of what has happened or has been going on... but I am continuing to place my faith in God and know that he can still do amazing things.

I think i need a recliner in my office right about now too.....

LIC

{{{LIC}}}

Continuing in prayer for you both...

Mark

Sometimes we must let go of the GOOD to reach out and take hold of the BEST.

Mark... is this a new signature line?!?!

LIC,

I've been using it for a few weeks now. I even considered changing it over the weekend, but I'm still applying it to my own life, so decided to keep it for a while longer.

Mark

hmm... well very interesting because i just noticed it this morning..... and really it was kinda nice to read....

I knew there was a reason I was leaving it like it was... <img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />

Mark

<img src="/ubbt/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" /> God takes care of his kids doesnt he!?!

I love it when He sends little messages when youre not expecting them!!!

He just knows what you need and when you need it!!!

LIC,

Just wanted to let you know I'm thinking about you.

Keep looking to Him for your needs.

Mark

Hey LIC,

I'm praying for you, too. How's it going?

Ace

Mark and Ace,
Thank you for your continued prayers. Things are not easy.... H told me he wants me out by this weekend so I have been attempting to get all my ducks in a row..... anyone who thinks that leaving is exciting.... boy they must be crazy!!! This has been one of the most difficult things I have had to do. It has been interesting though because God keeps on showing me the way. I have caught H lying and throwing me under the bus every chance he has! It is hard because my human side so wants to do the same thing, but at those moments of weakness I turn to God and pray for the strength to be an example of His love (though honestly i wonder how sometimes).

I know the challenges will not be stopping anytime soon, but I also know that I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me!

Please continue praying and I will keep you guys updates as long as you want to listen.

LIC

So sorry for your pain, LIC.

Are these behaviors consistent with possible 'masked' issues you've been suspicious about but could not get him to discuss or answer for the past several... uhhhh....months or even years?

Ace