Marriage Builders®
Posted By: better_than_ever What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 02:56 AM
Ok, most of yall know how I feel about porn. However, dh is taking a class, had to watch a video on the porn industry and now has to address this question:

What is the problem with pornography, if the participants are over 18 and willingly participate? At what point does this become a problem, especially if the videos are sold and viewed out of site of minors?


*** Now we all know that we are making the assumption that minors aren't impacted by this, just for the questions sake. In real life, we know this isn't true? So what would your response to the question be?
Posted By: God_heals_all Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 03:10 AM
The problem I with porn is that it takes something God intended to be special between two people, and water it down...I hope that makes sense...Now when you say that the participants are over 18, are you talking about the "actors", or the viewers...
Posted By: Orchid Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 03:24 AM
Porn is a disrespectful practice. A vice that can ruin one's reputation, health and relationships. Worse than alcohol (i.e. getting drunk), maybe even worse than a drug addiction. It is easily an addiction. There is no good from porn. Proponents of it try hard to legiitimize but have little success, yet the damage is great.

It is a profitable industry which relies on the lust and greed of a person's unbridled emotions. Does it deter rape or encourage it? That is a big debate. Just ask those who have been raped if they think porn helps.

It is sad to see something so vile being passed off as a remedy. It doesn't address the real issues, it provides at best an temporary relief until the selfish needs creeps up again....which it will, just a matter of when, then what?!?!?

L.
Posted By: piojitos Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 03:34 AM
Quote:

What is the problem with pornography, if the participants are over 18 and willingly participate?




hmmmm....

So two (or even more I guess) people want to have sex and get paid for it even though they aren't married. They are adults and responsible for their own decisions. If you want to discount the religion factor (which I personally cannot), I guess I have to say I accept their choice even if it would not be my personal choice. So let them go ahead and make the photographs or the movie. Is that pornography?

Or.....

Is pornography simply a money making business built around human weaknesses where brokers will do anything and everything in the name of profit?

Or.....

Is pornography defined as other people buying/watching it? If it is the latter then that is a far more serious issue. This is the part I have a problem with.

So how are YOU defining pornography? The making, selling or the watching?

In addition, where do you draw this line? Is pornography simply two people having their posteriors captured for posterity? Or does your definition expand to include S&M? Rape? What do they call that thing where people are actually killed in the process?

And do you know what is really funny? Pornography can be made with people and the governmnet cannot do anything about it. Freedom of expression. Constitutional rights. But use animals in a porno film and there will be he11 to pay with the ASPCA! And people wonder why I choose not to live in the USA.
Posted By: Resilient Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 03:40 AM
Quote:

What do they call that thing where people are actually killed in the process?




I believe its called something like "snuff films"?
Posted By: piojitos Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 03:42 AM
Quote:

I believe its called something like "snuff films"?





Thanks. I really don't keep up like I should.
Posted By: Resilient Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 03:48 AM
Quote:

Quote:

I believe its called something like "snuff films"?





Thanks. I really don't keep up like I should.




I only know because I read a lot. I swear!

Oh gawd, NM.

Got a spare shovel for this hole I'm digging?
Posted By: God_heals_all Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 03:57 AM
ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
Posted By: KiwiJ Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 04:06 AM
Porn has been around as long as humans have been around.

I haven't really got a point to make with that but it's a fact.
Posted By: Rock__ Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 04:09 AM
Personally I find it very damaging to a marriage over time. I know from personal experience how it chips away at the sanctity of a relationship, always raising the bar at what is acceptable and what is not. The porn viewer gets more and more accustomed to what he/she/they are viewing and keeps looking for something of more shock value. Kind of like a drug. If you are a man looking at porn, what does that say about how much you value your wife. What kind of message are you telling her?
Just MHO.
Posted By: piojitos Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 08:05 AM
Quote:

Porn has been around as long as humans have been around.





I don't get it. Do you mean live shows? I new Betamax was ancient technology but I didn't realize it was THAT ancient.
Posted By: Plank Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 10:53 AM
Better question for you BTE.

Would you want your daughter to be a porn star?

Why or why not?
Posted By: sadandconfused51 Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 11:08 AM
From a marriage standpoint, it is certainly hard to argue that porn will ever help a marriage. time is certainly better spent with your spouse than looking at porn online.

regarding snuff films - nicholas Cage has a movie where he is a detective trying to find out if a snuff film was an actual murder or not.
Posted By: _Larry_ Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 02:15 PM
Quote:

Ok, most of yall know how I feel about porn. However, dh is taking a class, had to watch a video on the porn industry and now has to address this question:

What is the problem with pornography, if the participants are over 18 and willingly participate? At what point does this become a problem, especially if the videos are sold and viewed out of site of minors?

*** Now we all know that we are making the assumption that minors aren't impacted by this, just for the questions sake. In real life, we know this isn't true? So what would your response to the question be?





Since he is taking a class - for grade points? - then the answer is whatever the professor wants to see if grade points is the objective. If the teacher is willing to accept personal opinions, then whatever DH believes is the correct answer.

Factually, porn has been around for a very long time. You can see ancient Chinese and Japanese drawings dating back for many centuries and Indian porn is legendary. Western depictions include cave drawings.

Currently, the most widespread porn is online for (typically) males and in books for females (Harlequin and derivatives). Porn for women has morphed into vampire and the supernatural. Women will argue about this till the cows come home, using a male definition of porn instead of one that is more accurate as applying to women.

Merriam-Webster's Dictionary of Law

Main Entry: por·nog·ra·phy
Pronunciation: por-'nä-gr&-fE
Function: noun
: material that depicts erotic behavior and is intended to cause sexual excitement
NOTE: Pornographic material is protected expression unless it is determined to be obscene. However, child pornography is illegal under federal and state laws prohibiting the depiction of minors in sexual acts. —

There are multiple definitions of pornography with the one above probably the shortest and easiest to understand. In point of fact, porn is in the eyes of the beholder.

The problem with porn is that there is no problem according to some and major problems according to others. The most realistic "problem" is likely this one: Pornography diverts a person (Male or female) from the reality of sexual expression with a real person to one that is unreal and based on fantasy. The introduction of unrealistic fantasy into the intimacy dynamic between two people is counterproductive toward maintaining a high level of intimacy between those same two people. The results of that will vary by person but in no event is a reduction of intimacy a positive or desired dynamic.

Hope this helps. I tried to be objective. My own opinion is that porn, both the male and female version, is not a mentally healthy expression of sexuality and can lead to all sorts of problems with bonding and real love. From a moral POV, it is an abomination.

Larry
Posted By: piojitos Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 02:22 PM
I believe Indian porn is very unhealthy. WW bought a copy of the Kama Sutra when we went to the Taj Mahal and page 37 alone had me in traction for two months.
Posted By: Pepperband Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 03:09 PM
*THIS* is what is wrong with porn....

>it escalates over time
>the level of sluttishness increases
>the level of dehuminizing others spirals
>it takes sexuality to a form of vicarious abuse of others for one's physical pleasure
Posted By: MrsWondering Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 04:01 PM
"Using" porn robs your spouse of your sexual energy...Not good at all...

Mrs. W
Posted By: Rock__ Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 07:13 PM
Quote:

I believe Indian porn is very unhealthy. WW bought a copy of the Kama Sutra when we went to the Taj Mahal and page 37 alone had me in traction for two months.




Posted By: KiwiJ Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 08:22 PM
Happy birthday, RockSolid.

I hate "modern" porn but I am quite a fan of historical erotica. I have a book under my bed *blush* of historical Japanese erotic drawings. The drawings (pillow books) were given to women on their wedding nights and I gotta say they're very erotic. I like Victorian and Georgian erotica as well. Oh, and Roman (think Pompeii), ancient Greek and Indian temple erotica.

It's a WORLD away from the sleazy porn industry of today.

LOL at Pio.
Posted By: Rock__ Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 08:32 PM
Quote:

Happy birthday, RockSolid.





Thanks!
Posted By: Resilient Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 09:14 PM
Boy, thats 3 today (Rock, Mel and Noni)

Happy Birthday, Rock!
Posted By: piojitos Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/01/07 11:49 PM
Quote:

Boy, thats 3 today (Rock, Mel and Noni)





And yet nobody has ever seen them posting at the same time...hmmmm....could they be the SAME PERSON?
Posted By: Mulan Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/02/07 12:17 AM
Worst thing about porn IMHO is the extremely warped impression it can give men - especially young men - about what women are really like and what women really want and what women really do. I think that's probably the most damaging aspect of pornography specifically.

Oh, and Harlequin does not publish "porn".

In the Romance Novel industry, the definitions are as follows:

Pornography - sex with no emotional connection.

Erotica - sex with an emotional connection.

Most women really aren't into porn and that's why Romance publishers, whose books are aimed at women, don't publish it. (Really, they don't - it doesn't sell.) But erotica has become hugely popular over the last few years and most of the publishers are jumping on the bandwagon. If you want to know what "women's porn" is like, just look up Ellora's Cave on a Google search.

Mulan>used to be a Romance novelist but never wrote any erotica
Posted By: Resilient Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/02/07 12:29 AM
Quote:

Quote:

Boy, thats 3 today (Rock, Mel and Noni)





And yet nobody has ever seen them posting at the same time...hmmmm....could they be the SAME PERSON?




oooo, a conspiracy. Maybe we should investigate. Got your IP tracer ready?

Wait, I would *hope* if they were the same person they'd be smart enough not to submit the same birth date. Although perhaps for convenience's sake, they only changed the year and re-utilized the same month/day.

On aside, my laptop's backspace button contact is almost non-functional which makes typing a bear. Time for a new laptop.
Posted By: MarriedMom Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/02/07 02:59 AM
I think personally that its a disgrace. Its something that should be filled with love and they do it for money or fame. Yuck. Thankfully I have a hubby who agrees so their isnt an issue. I guess it depends on the persons morals and opinion, some like it for fantasy or ideas. I just dont happen to be one of them
Posted By: Mates4Life Re: What's wrong with porn? - 07/02/07 10:22 AM
This is too easy.. in a word "Exploitation". It is degrading and reduces a person from a whole spiritual human being to a body part.

And in a marriage, well I just read a phrase from Larry, "intimacy reduction fantasy". How apropos.
© Marriage Builders® Forums