FWH was in an emotional affair. It has since ended, and I no longer live with an alien. I know for a fact there is no contact. I have forgiven, but I'm not stupid I still check phone records, nor does he have access to the internet unless I am with him. He has confessed and answered all my questions. More importantly he has given his life back to God. He knows how wrong he was, and he is just sick with how awful he was to me during that time. His words and actions are proving this to me.

The emotional affair ended 10/08. OW has now decided that she wants me to know all the details of EA, and last week sent me a package of their emails from 2007. I told H about it. I glanced at a few, but what was written was nothing I didn't already know. I shredded them. Just yesterday OW sent H some of their emails from 2007. (she sent the package to his job) He called me right away and told me. I told him to bring them home so we could shred them. But before I shredded them I looked through them. She had hand written questions on every page. i.e. "Did you mean any of this?" "Do you have any idea what these words meant to me." "I need my H's name." "How do you let go and say goodbye to your soulmate?" "What am I suppose to do now?" "I will never give up." "When I say I love you, I mean it."

Our plan was to just ignore her. If anything else comes our plan is to send it back unopened. Is this a good plan, or should we do something else? I had thought about having H write her, with me helping him, and me sending it. But he feels this would just anger her.

I'm very unhappy about this turn of events, I do not want to be out of God's will. H does not want to be out of God's will either. But he is somewhat afraid of her, and what she may do if she becomes angry.

FYI OW is divorced, she was going through this during the time of the EA, and everyone in her family seems to know she was having the EA.

Any ideas?

Save it in case you need evidence for the attorneys later in court. Lock it up somewhere.

Save a copy. Mail the originals back to her. If another packet comes, do the same. Make sure you include a note from both of you that says you have saved copies for your files should you need them in the future and are returning the originals to her.

Contact a lawyer immediately, and have him draft a letter informing her that legal action will be taken if she continues to harrass or stalk FWH or any member of his family.

And if you receive anything else from her, save if as evidence.

I agree with SMB. But don't stoop to her level with sending anything back. Does he want you and not her? If he's over her then I think that as long as you rely on each other you won't have much to worry about. Just make sure you stick together and he doesn't let his fear of her over power him. He needs to let his love for you and your love for him over power him.

And since you both believe in God, keep trusting God and know that he can be there for you. You have the strength to deal with this if you continue to keep your faith.