Yes my WW has admitted to having an affair. What she continues to lie about is NC. She will not admitt to contact unless I provide proof, which I have, she then gets angry and says she will end it again. My WS constantly decries that my only purpose in telling OPS is to hurt other people, she maintains that it is only an act of revenge on my part. I dont fully understand my fear in telling the OP's spouse. Am I afraid it will cause the end of my marriage? My WS seems so distraught and emotional when the topic comes up. To me its almost like I am helping keep thier secret..........
Your marriage is headed for the rocks if you DON'T expose it. You are enabling this affair in every way. If you want to save your marriage, you will have to expose the affair - to everyone. Without warning. Expose to everyone, such as family, friends, children, the affairees facebooks friends. Affairs thrive on secrecy and exposure is ruinous.
Your marriage can survive some temporary anger, it can't survive an affair. Go over to the newsletter forum and read Dr Harleys newsletter about exposure. Here is what Dr Harley, the founder of Marriage Builders, says about exposure:
. If the unfaithful spouse is offended by being exposed, so be it. Exposure is very likely to end the affair, lifting the fog that has overcome the unfaithful spouse, helping him or her become truly repentant and willing to put energy and effort into a full marital recovery. In my experience with thousands of couples who struggle with the fallout of infidelity, exposure has been the single most important first step toward recovery. It not only helps end the affair, but it also provides support to the betrayed spouse, giving him or her stamina to hold out for ultimate recovery.
here