How do i express to my h (he left 2 years ago) that i can only handle friendship at the moment because Im scared to get hurt, and for peace sake and for our childs sake, and because i really value his friendship?

I still have hope in a miracle towards restoration of our marriage and i desire this more than anything, but I want to let go of him. Im ready to do that now. Ive even told his parents I have to let go of them, that I cant be a part of their family anymore, it hurts too much.

How do I keep the hope alive, guard my heart, let him go, but not give up?

How can I love him from a distance without it annoying him?

I cant reveal too much as others sometimes read wat Ive written - or they'll find it one day - and use it against me.

Any ideas?

Dancer

Hmm, it seems to me a little help in resolving your issues is in order.

Have you tried individual therapy for you?

Good to see you here again Dancer! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

I hope all is well with you. I also hope that the time you've spent away from MB has been useful in getting you back on track for YOU. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Feel free to email me again if you like (I've misplaced your email with the moves to the shelters and the new house). topie25@hotmail.com is the addy... and I'll write back to you with my new primary email addy.

The simplest answer I can think of for you, is that if all you want is friendship from your H now, then treat him as you care to be treated. The golden rule... do unto others as you would have them do unto you. There is no need to pressure him or bug him, if all you're doing is being friendly, right?

You won't give up, b/c you know you still love your H. But you also know that you cannot change HIM, and that, once it sinks in, will be what helps you to move on.

Take care,
Karen