Dear Dynamo:<P>Simmer down now
.<P>All joking aside, I will post a few excerpts taken from "Let the Journey Begin" by Max Lucado. These passages have helped me tremendously in dealing with my anger, bitterness.<P>I am now at the 13 month post d-day point. My anger "left" me approximately 5 months ago...and, honestly, it feels so much better to be at "peace"...I hope this helps you...and I'm assuming, since I read above that you attend mass, that the spirituality of these pieces will be "okay" with you (hope so
):<P><B>REVENGE IS A RAGING FIRE</B><BR>Resentment is the cocaine of the emotions.<BR>It causes our blood to pump and our energy level to rise.<BR>But, also like cocaine, it demands increasingly larger and more frequent dosages. There is a dangerous point at which anger ceases to be an emotion and becomes a driving force. A person bent on revenge moves unknowingly further and further away from being able to forgive, for to be without the anger is to be without a source of energy.<BR>That explains why the bitter complain to anyone who will listen. They want--they need--to have their fire fanned...<BR>Resentment is like cocaine in another way, too. Cocaine can kill the addict. And anger can kill the angry...<BR>And it can be spiritually fatal, too. It shrivels the soul.<BR>Hatred is the rabid dog that turns on its owner. Revenge is the raging fire that consumes the arsonist. Bitterness is the trap that snares the hunter.<BR>And mercy is the choice that can set them all free. <BR>Remember: You will never forgive anyone more than God has already forgiven you. ~The Applause of Heaven<P><B>DO YOU HAVE A HOLE IN YOUR HEART?</B><BR>Perhaps the wound is old. A partner abused you. A teacher slighted you...<BR>And you are angry.<BR>Or perhaps the wound is fresh. The friend who owes you money just drove by in a new car. The boss who hired you with promises of promotions has forgotten how to pronounce your name. Your circle of friends escaped on a weekend getaway, and you weren't invited...<BR>And you are hurt.<BR>Part of you is broken, and the other part is bitter. Part of you wants to cry, and part of you wants to fight. The tears you cry are hot because they come from your heart, and there is a fire burning in your heart. It's the fire of anger. It's blazing. It's consuming. Its flames leap up under a steaming pot of revenge.<BR>And you are left with a decision. "Do I put the fire out or heat it up? Do I get over it or get even? Do I release it or resent it? Do I let my hurts heal, or do I let hurt turn into hate?...<BR>Resentment is the deliberate decision to nurse the offense until it becomes a black, fury, growling grudge...<BR>Unfaithfulness is wrong. Revenge is bad. But the worst part of all is that, without forgiveness, bitterness is all that is left.<BR>Remember: God forgets the past. Imitate him. ~The Applause of Heaven<P>And, because I always like to go out on a POSITIVE, upbeat note here's a passage that hopefully will help you CHOOSE LOVE:<P><B>I CHOOSE LOVE</B><BR>It's quiet. It's early. My coffee is hot. The sky is still black. The world is still asleep. The day is coming.<BR>In a few moments the day will arrive. It will roar down the track with the rising of the sun. The stillness of the dawn will be exchanged for the noise of the day. The calm of solitude will be replaced by the pounding pace of the human race. The refuge of the early morning will be invaded by decisions to be made and deadlines to be met.<BR>For the next twelve hours I will be exposed to the day's demands. It is now that I must make a choice.<BR>I choose love...<BR>No occasion justifies hatred; no justice warrants bitterness. I choose love.<BR>I choose joy...<BR>I will invite God to be the God of cicumstance. I will refuse the temptation to be cynical...the tool of the lazy thinker. I will refuse to see people as anything less than human beings, created by God. I will refuse to see any problem as anything less than an opportunity to see God.<BR>I choose peace...<BR>I will live forgiven. I will forgive so that I may live.<BR>I choose patience...<BR>I will overlook the inconveniences of the world. Instead of cursing the one who takes my place, I'll invite him to do so. Rather than complain that the wait is too long, I will take a moment to pray. Instead of clinching my fist at new assingments, I will face them with courage.<BR>I choose kindness...<BR>I will be kind to the unkind, for such is how God has treated me.<BR>I choose goodness...<BR>I will go without a dollar before I take a dishonest one. I will be overlooked before I will boast. I will confess before I will accuse. I choose goodness.<BR>I choose faithfulness...<BR>Today I will keep my promises. My debtors will not regret their trust. My associates will not question my word. My wife will not question my love. My children will never fear that their father will not come home.<BR>I choose gentleness...<BR>Nothing is won by force. I choose to be gentle. If I raise my voice, may it be in praise. If I clench my fist, may it be only in prayer. If I make a demand, may it be only of myself.<BR>I choose self-control...<BR>I will be drunk only by joy. I will be impassioned only by my faith. I will be influenced only by God.<BR>Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control: To these I commit my day. If I succeed, I will give thanks. If I fail, I will seek His grace. And then, when this day is done, I will place my head on my pillow and rest. ~When God Whispers Your Name.<P>Peace and Happy Thoughts to you! ~Marie<P>------------------<BR>"If you cry because the sun has gone out of your life, your tears will prevent you from seeing the stars." ~unknown<p>[This message has been edited by ohmy_marie (edited November 03, 2000).]