I'm 43 years old, and I really want to have a breast augmentation done. I do not want to increase my size, all I want is to be able to wear a normal bra, a swimsuit, without having droopy breasts. It would just make me feel better. And I want to be sexier for him. Of course he says, he's happy with the way I am (but I'm not).<P>I don't think my husband wants me to have one, yet, he is having Lasik surgery done. He says it's so he can get up in the morning and see. But I think it also has a big emotional effect on him not having to wear contacts or glasses anymore.<P>Would you think that these are similiar situations? <P>He has no problem spending 1000 on his Lasik, and he told me I couldn't have the augmentation till all our bills are paid. It does cost around 4000. I must also add, I bring home more than he does. It will take a good year for us to have all our bills paid.<P>Any suggestions on how best to handle this with him? I must ad, he is the jealous type, and somewhat insecure.<P>Thanks,

Ourlove -<P>Hi. I have been contemplating having the Lasik eye surgery, too. I don't know if you can really compare a breast augmentation with eye surgery. The first - unless for health reasons, is purely cosmetic, while the second has some pretty obvious health benefits. Anyone who has ever worn glasses or contacts knows that eye surgery will more or less change their lives.<P>I don't know if you wear glasses or contacts or not, but I do. When I wake up at night, I can't just pop out of bed and go get a drink of water if I need it - I need to fumble around for my glasses first. Every morning, I don't greet a bright new day, I wake up cloudy, to a world of blurs and shapes until I pop in my contacts. I play very active sports and if something happens to one of my contacts, I have to bring extras - just to ensure that I can see the ball.<P>My H likes to ask me questions all the time about "If a genie granted me three wishes, what would they be." The first one I have always said is to have "perfect vision." And that's not a lie. Having to rely on glasses and contacts - well, it's not exactly fun, and while it may seem like a "cosmetic" procedure - I think the benefits of having the surgery would be something to consider - no more glasses, no more spending money on contact lenses and solutions - there are definitely benefits other than not wanting to wear glasses. My big dream is that when I have kids, that I'll no longer have to pop in contact lenses just to see my kids' faces in the morning - that's what I'd like.<P>The breast augmentation - if it makes you feel good - then you need to do it for you. Just make sure that you find a safe procedure, and it wouldn't be so bad to wait a year - just to make sure this is what you really want. I know, for myself, that I don't have any desire to have that type of surgery - so maybe I'm not the best person to ask for an opinion, but I think you need to do what makes you feel good, and it would be smart to pay for it once your bills are caught up.<P>But, really, I don't think you've gotten a lot of responses because it's only a decision you can make. Good luck to you.

Hi there,<P>OurLoveRestored says:<BR> all I want is to be able to wear a normal bra, a swimsuit, without having droopy breasts. It would just make me feel better<P>(about husband)<BR>But I think it also has a big emotional effect on him not having to wear contacts or glasses anymore.<BR>SKM says:<BR>I don't know if you can really compare a breast augmentation with eye surgery. The first - unless for health reasons, is purely cosmetic, while the second has some pretty obvious health benefits. Anyone who has ever worn glasses or contacts knows that eye surgery will more or less change their lives.<P>I'm weasring contacts so I know what it is to not be able to see at night.<BR>I had just recently a breast reduction surgery (the opposite of what you want to do :-) )<BR>But it changed my whole attitude of live!<BR>It might sound cosmetic to have a breast surgery done but it will change so much in your live ! <BR>Eyes you can correct with lenses but not being able to wear "normal" clothes is someting that is difficult to correct.<P>Therefore I think that the two issues are about the same level. As far as you waiting a year to have your surgery because of finances, that is something you and your husband should discuss.<P>I waited about 4 years before we had the right insurance to pay for it. <P>I feel young, attractive and I can choose any clothes I want and I'm very happy with my "new" look, Sex became a lot more enjoyable for me since I was no longer negative about my body, and my husband loves my new vieuw at live.<P>Good luck on talking to your husband about it and don't let your surgery being pushed away as "just cosmetic) (no affense SKM )<P>Ka

Hi Baloe,<P>I have been wanting to have reduction done. If you don't mind my asking, how long was recovery time? Do you have a lot of scarring? How much difference is there? All the information I have received has been very discouraging and I'm glad to hear from someone who is pleased with it.<P>Peppermint

Baloe - Hey, no offense taken. I didn't really think about wearing normal clothes/bras etc. Since, I've never really thought about having that kind of surgery - I knew I wouldn't be the best person to offer up advice.<P>I've never really been big on surgery - I try to avoid it at all costs, lol. I guess I just wanted to let Ourlove know that she should have the surgery if it's what she wants. And, you know, I never really thought about the sex aspect - believe it or not. But when you feel good about yourself -you do enjoy sex better - so even her husband would potentially reap some of the rewards - i.e,. happy, confident wife.<P>I just hate for someone to have surgery if it's not really what they want - or they think it's what someone else wants. Or to do something they think will make them look prettier - because beauty comes from the inside - but I didn't think about the whole bra issue. It isn't really costmetic, is it? My apologies.