Although my WW supposedly ended the A on 10/24, she did see and talk to him that same week and has not stopped contact with OM. I have been going forward with Plan A other than this subject. She has to make contact via phone or mail as he lives several hours away. I know this means the A still exists. We took a 5 day trip together and shared quite a lot of intimacy. But since our return, no intimacy, hence the feeling her contact with him has continued. I have a source at her work, but cannot confirm anything definite. My main question is even if I get her to agree to send a NCL, all she has to do is contact OM by email or phone and tell him to ignore it? Last night she called me from work with the news she has to take an overnight trip. She gave me some assurances that she is "going alone" and that "it is only one night and I can call her" I feel I need to apply some pressure for her to decide what she wants while she is away, but plan A says don't make demands?

I need to know how to proceed.

Nothing you can do about a business trip.

Plan A your heart out.
And agree to give you W many calls (without interferring with her work)...
...it's part of what the trust building process.

You (your W) can only send a NCL when she is wholehearted disposed to NO CONTACT. Sending one when she is not ready to send it is self defeating... and all you can do in the mean time is Plan A.

Jim

Go with her.

The last buisness trip my W was to go on, I told her fine. But I was going to go with. My W told me the company was not going to pay my way, I told her i will pay my own way. My W told me she would be in meeting all day, I told her that I would find some way to amuse myself while she was buisy.

The trip got canceled, I wonder why?