Hi everyone

I just have some questions that i wouldn't mind throwing out there for opinions. Ex is stil chasing the guy she had an A with,(Sept 06) sounds like he is done with her but she is still chasing him. (have an inside line on info i stumbled accross one day long ago, so far it still works) Anyway, ex is having the kids phone me more in the evenings, today i told her i was going away for a week in November and she insisted on knowing where i was going. Told her i would not have the kids so it was none of her business, she still insisted on knowing. Tried to say i ask her and i certainly do not and told her so, she backed off on that one because she had no choice, but she kept insisting. So to get her off my back i said, "well it is hunting season," i didn't say i was going hunting. I am actualy going to meet a woman i met online, we get along great and we talk daily on msn. Also today i had to call her about something and she asked who was there and where i was. Said i was at home and it was the TV in the back ground, all the truth.

So, she doesn't want me, but wants to control me, am i right? I know the forums are a great place for feed back, just wonder if anyone lurking wants to throw their two cents in on this. Thanks

If the OP has dumped her, she may be feeling you out to see if you are available for reconciliation.

Hi Greengables Thanks for the reply.

I wish it was so, but i understand they have gone back to friends with benifits, friends but sleep together, he is just using her and she is chasing him from what I gather. So i guess it is a control thing. I was hopeful for a bit, but now they are back together, sort of. It is hard moving on.

Well i know this is common,but i need to vent. Droped the boys off and she started into me about how it was all my fault the marriage ended and none of it was her fault. She left out the fact she had an affair and if she did admit it, that would be my fault too.

I think she is feeling guilty and trying to put the blame on me. She sure has a hate on for me though.

This is why I have made my PlanB permanent. There is nothing that my XW has to say to me that can't go through a third party. Much more peaceful, and it is helping me to move on as well.

Good luck with your new friend. Just remember to take it easy. Don't get in no hurry to get into another relationship.

Hi Gale44
Hi everyone

Thanks for the reply. That sounds like a good soluton, hope i don't have to resort to that. Yesterday i got blasted again. We had a case conference with a judge on the 10th and i don't think she is going to get the sweet heart deal she thought she was. She has been acting strange since, more bitter if that is possible. Yesterday she left 5 messages for me looking for the kids while i had them. we were up north out of cell range hunting for 6 hours, nothing i haven't done before with them. She said i should let her know if i will be out of phone range. well, i don't keep tabs on her and where she goes when she has the kids. Control again as far as i can see. The judge said i should get more time witht he kids, so that is her way of getting abck at me i guess. My question is why so much hatred. Yes i could have been a better husband, i feely admit it, i cuold have given way more of myself and made her a priority, but she had the affair and left. Why so much hatred directed at me. I try to be nice and validate her feelings and she just spits venum back. Any ideas?

Hi everyone

She used to act all happy and seemed she was having fun. Yesterday i saw her walking in town and she didn't ahve a bounce in her step that was for sure. It has been 13 months since she has been seeing OM. In Feb 07 she asked to date him,(they were just sleeping together) and he told her he wanted to be single. End of August she said she wasn't going to play by his rules anymore and that she loved him and didn't regret anyhting. He replied they should not contact each other. That lasted about a week. So it seems like they are back to friends with benifits. I don't get it, he treats her like that and i'm the bad guy. I would happily work things out, he just uses her and she is making him cookies and asking him out to go for walks in the woods. When we were together she was super possesive, this guy dates others openly and she is still in love with him, she just waits her turn i guess.

I can hear everyone asking why do i want her back. i ask that question too. I just don't know why either. Geeze, maybe i'm like her. Who's the bigger fool, the fool or the fool who follows a fool...ouch...

maybe she likes the challenge of trying to win him since he is not devoted to her?

gosh, who knows why people do what they do? when you find out will you please tell me!

mlhb

oh, and if you would be willing to work it out with your ex, do you think you should be bringing someone else in the picture? what would you do if you start dating this person and your wife decides she is through with om and wants to work it out? are you going to dump the girl you are dating? is that fair?