Marriage Builders
Posted By: Lie2me At last, the big D - 03/23/09 05:12 PM
Hello everyone,

After years of one false recovery after another I am finaly here. Should have been a long time ago I guess.

I have no idea what to look forward to at this point, my lawyer will have my D paperwork done this week, then my WW gets served.

A little scared as to what her reaction may be.

I don't know if you guys want to hear my story again or not, if you do I will tell, if not thanks for letting me in.
Posted By: Lie2me Re: At last, the big D - 03/23/09 06:44 PM
Reading all the posts here it makes me understand how much more I need to move on with my life.

Our seperation took place in December of 04, I did a bang up plan A, a bad plan B, and now on to plan D.

I am reading about so much pain, confusion and the inability to understand.

My WW is still in a fog, of that I'm sure, the problem is and I think with some others here, we let the fog of our WS's envelope us at times.

I have spent nearly five years trying to fight for my M and my family.

the sad part is I have been aware of her lies for many years but I have chosen to ignore in the hopes of recovery.

At the end of the day I have my family, my two DD's, the cats the fish, we just don't have her.

At some point we need to stand up and carry on, if our WS's want to come along for the ride in an honest open recovery, by all means, otherwise, get off the rollarcoaster.

just my thought
Posted By: catperson Re: At last, the big D - 03/23/09 08:11 PM
Sometimes you are doing the WS the biggest favor of all by moving on. Taking away her support network. Forcing her to grow up.

I just read a fascinating little book by a woman who had a bad childhood, moved to another city and had 5 more years of h&ll there, but refused to complain about it. She called those years the best years because she survived it and became a very strong, capable woman. Oh, and because she did it only with God's help. What an attitude!

I truly believe hardship is sometimes our best friend.
Posted By: Lie2me Re: At last, the big D - 03/24/09 02:39 PM
I think you have a good point, moving on is the best I can do for myself and my kids, and at the same time the best for the ww.

She no longer has the support from me, and as it turns out she has other men to take care of her needs.

That in itself can help me wash my hands of the matter.
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