Restoration of Marriages Prayer Group - March 19

Marriage Builders

Every Wed. we are to pray and fast for one another. Every Weds we can check in and let everyone know we have prayed for the group. Prayer does mighty things and group prayer is even better.

Right now I am doing "Experiencing God Day by Day" and Lupolady is doing "Power of a Praying Wife" for the ladies. You can use this as your prayer or have your own or combine them.

I think it will be great to see how God works in our lives and heals our marriages and us.

If you want to pray with us I will be more than happy to add your name to the list below.

Prayer Warriors who are praying and being prayed for: cajunky,Ezra, Willgetthruthis, Godisincontrol, Natasha79, JohnC, c++_guy, Wallace, relady, steadfast and committed, morriggs,lupolady, stillwaiting, Broken Hearted, PasDeDeux, hopeful_person,GinnyF, Not peachy in Ga, cry2much,SNL,LostAgain(Dave&April), Dodger, gloriachu, LoveNcare,JMF,WEN, NiteHawk, Absurd, LetSTry,AgainsttheWind,cemmerson, getting better,kellidiane,Terrified, BeeLee,idostylin, Resilient, thiscantbehappening, day by day, Jloves, broken x3, Sue with Hope, sunrise1, shepette, Malc, Faithfulwife, timbo-e,Angelia,FeelingAllAlone,broken_joe,dopey,awake,truly a friend, Is it to late, stilltryingtosaveit, landslide,GODBLESSU,vega,LoyalWarrior,janna-m-r,ferbie

Prayers Answered: Lupolady(air conditioner),Steadfastandcommitted(first string again),cry2much(sucessful surgery), Movingonwithlife(Wife coming home),WGTT(accepted into mentor program), betrayed and desparate (sucessful cancer surgery),Againstthewind(Got job), Free ( Marriage Restoration begun ), cajunky (wife not engaged & did something with family, told me she loved me), Stillwaiting(neice is o.k.), Stillwaiting(Got to see her husband for 2 hours and his heart seems to have softened), Steadfastandcommitted (wife gave up other man and said steadfast is stuck with her. God showed her the change was for real in steadfast)

Love in Christ
Cajunky

[ March 13, 2003, 06:35 PM: Message edited by: cajunky ]

This was posted by Willgetthruthis at the end of last weeks thread and I wanted to start this week off on a "GOD NOTE".

<blockquote>quote:<hr />posted March 13, 2003 02:27 PM
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
VERY INTERESTING WH Just called me about someone that may buy the business!!!!!An employee wanted to buy it, but it fell thru so we thought we were going to have to liquidate it. We owe a GREAT deal of money on this disaster.

WH said that the guy that is interested is a real "strong born again Christian." This all has happened in the last 2 days ! The Christian man told WH that the Lord was watching over him. And it was the Lord that brought him to WH. WH replied that he didn't know but whatever works.

As soon as I heard the part about the 2 days and that the man was a strong Christian and God had sent him, Chills went down my spine because ...... 2 days ago I was in touch with Broken Stone Ministries - Our Fathers Arms who help alcholics / addicts and he started to pray for WH. WOW God is Good. The man (From the Ministry) is an X-addict himself and I had such a good feeling when I met him this past weekend. It was no accident that God brought us together.

God Bless,

D.

<hr /></blockquote>Love in Christ
cajunky

OK....I need your prayers again on something I am going to do. As you know I have really been burdened about my wife not going to church. She was active in our church. When we got divorced she moved 40 minutes away and there isn't a church that feeds her like ours does. There are people that drive from where my wife lives to our church but she hasn't done that yet.

Another burden I have is that she is dating a Non-christian. He has stated that he didn't care what people thought of him. I haven't been praying for his salvation because I thought this was the one thing that would drive my wife away from him. WELLLLL, God spoke to me a few days ago and said " Who are you to not pray for someone to get to know me". Needless to say I struggled with it but in the last couple of days I have begun praying for him and his salvation.

With that said, here is what I need you guys to pray for. I am going to ask my wife to come to our church where she can get fed again even if it means bringing her boyfriend.

My number one prayer still is that GOD will restore my marriage. I just feel like this is what God wants me to do and this is another way of getting out of Gods way and letting him do his thing. I told the head of the singles ministry the other nite that I can picture my wife helping with the "6:33 Live" nite we are putting together. She is so talented in so many areas and I would love to have her by my side but if that is what God wants then he will do it.

Just pray that I will be able to speak the right words and my wife will hear the words that are in my heart. I think you all know how much I truly love her. Someone asked me yesterday if the reason I wanted my wife back was because of putting our family back together or was it because I loved her. I didn't hesitate when I said "It is both. I love my wife unconditionally very much and I want our family back".

Love in Christ
cajunky

[ March 13, 2003, 03:58 PM: Message edited by: cajunky ]

Didn't see my name on the list. Please keep praying for me and my husband...that our marriage is repaired and becomes better than ever.

Thanks so much!

Ferbie

Cajunky,

I have been led to pray for the OW's salvation as well as WH's "friend" really partner in crime. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> The thought on some level really makes me sick, but I am trying to be obedient. My prayer is that someone else lead them to the Lord.

My thoughts after reading your post, maybe if BF is saved, then he will begin to feel his concious and leave the relationsip with your wife.

Blessings,

D.

Here's another praise report -

A friend who is an OW (YUK) sent me an email today saying that she will be back in Florida next week on job interviews. YEAH! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> She had moved away from here to be with a married man because she was so utterly in love with him and they were going to live happily ever after. <img border="0" title="" alt="[Eek!]" src="images/icons/shocked.gif" /> My friend had Dv her own H cuz he was an addict, mind you her A "had nothing to do with her Dv". Well I guess not all was well in "paradise".

I have been talking with her, suggesting that if she was to ever have a true relationship, that she needed to be OK with herself and God, and that the man involved needed to do the same. Seems like MM would not get off the fence, DV had been filed by his wife, but in 2 years no progress had been made. HMMM.

God is good. I have prayed for this MM. He reached out to me last Sept & said that he didn't know why he called me except that I was a strong Christian. I replied that God knew what he was doing by him calling me & went into my own experience. I have been praying that he do the right thing. I kept thinking that if my WH had reached out to someone, I would want them to be someone like me.

Blessings,

D.

[ March 13, 2003, 05:35 PM: Message edited by: WillGetThruThis ]

stillwaiting had posted this at the end of last weeks thread and I didn't want to forget it.

<blockquote>quote:<hr /> Please pray for my brother and his daughter, my niece that went through the bad time in January.
They have been evicted from their home, due to a bad judical system and a very uncaring judge.
They have to be out by the 21st of March, and was only notified last week. So far he has found nothing. Please pray for God's intervention here. My brother is really bitter towards God, I dare not even let him know I'm praying for him. I'm sure he already knows that, but it makes him mad. I ask you to pray for him to reach out to the Lord, and that the Lord will direct him to a perfect place. I can't imagine him being booted out, this is really hard on them. His wife is in a convelesant home, she has MS, he makes very little $ and although he works, he won't be able to afford much. Thankyou for your prayers,
you are all in mine! God Bless, SW
<hr /></blockquote>Love in Christ
cajunky

"In everything give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."

Ouch. I don't like this verse! I just have SUCH a hard time thanking God for what has happened to me!! I would so much rather ask Him, "WHY ME??" and wallow in my tears.

But the more that I have just been obedient and applied this verse, the more I've learned something. I need to thank God, from a sincere heart, for working HIS plan in HIS time. Most of the time when I do not feel thankful, it is because I want Him to work MY plan!

So...

Blessed are You, Lord our God, King of the Universe...for You truly are our Lord and King. Thank You for this morning. Honestly, it tastes bitter in my mouth to thank You, but I know that You want my heart to praise You for working in Your way and in Your time. Thank You for giving me the courage and inner calm to take care of my customer--even though I was afraid I didn't know what I was doing and even though I felt all stirred-up emotionally. Thank You for working in my stbxH's life, even though he isn't very willing to see Your work or hear Your words yet--I know he'll get there. Thank You for sending sunny weather to Colorado so that I was reminded of Your warmth and Your presence when I felt sad. Thank You for granting me serenity after I got control of my mind again. Thank You for sending me a service call to help pay for the bills!!

Thank You for the improvement I've seen in my son lately--his willingness to open up a little and talk...actually attending classes...and doing a little better on his grades. I know what has happened is REALLY rough on him, so I'm grateful to see he is doing a little better. Thank You that my son and his dad had a decent visit without yelling or hurt feelings. Thank You for their ability to connect a little. Thank You for my daughter's suggestion for dinner--she is so intuitive! Thank You for letting us spend a little time together tonight--even if it was just watching some TV.

Thank You for my plumbing problems--I think Your sense of humor is funny. Very ironic. Thank You for sending me these problems (plumbing, flat tire, etc.) and then sending me the SOLUTION to the problem. I get it, I get it...You are PROVIDING for me and the kids!

Thank You that cajunky's wife is dating a non-Christian. Yep...I said thank You. Thank You for knowing what You're doing but not necessarily revealing it to us, so we can learn to trust You. Thank You for working through that man even though HE doesn't believe in YOU! That's funny. Thank You for working in her life by hook or by crook, however You can. Thank You for not abandoning her even though she may not be embracing You...thank You for Your diligence and persistance. Thank You for teaching cajunky to TURN HER OVER TO YOU and not keep trying to do what YOU should do. Thank You for not abandoning him even though he sometimes feels abandoned. Thank You so very, VERY much for opening his eyes and bringing him back to You. Good one!

Thank You for WGTT's OW. Can You believe I said that!! OY! Thank You for using a sinful situation to advance Your will without anyone knowing it. Thank You for her WH's partner in crime too. I know You love them both as Your precious children, but that's kind of hard for us to stomach. Thank You for holding our hair while we puke when we pray for them. Thank You for gradually giving us a willing spirit--even if it means praying for our enemies. Thank You for being so loving that You even want those people to come to know You intimately so that You can do even MORE of Your work and work through them! Can You IMAGINE the testimony they could give if they came to YOU??? Well of course You can, but You know what I mean!

And finally, thank You for not only working in our ex or stbx spouse's lives, but also working in us and through us too. I tend to forget that by walking through this fire I learned several much-needed and hard-earned lessons that You wanted me to learn! Not the least of which is how to praise You for some of this stuff that has happened! Not the least of which is how to be obedient even when I don't want to! Not the least of which is how to be MATURE in You and not immature with shallow roots. Not the least of which is that I can WALK THROUGH FIRE and be purified and not be burned.

Thank You.

CJ

cj, your GREAT! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" /> I love reading your posts!

Praise report! my brother found a place and is moving on Saturday. Please continue to pray for him and his daughter, who has been going through depression.
Thankyou for your prayers!
I do have another prayer request, yesterday a very good friend of mine and my H's, Paul,told me he has been diagnosed with Chronic Lukemia. He is trusting in the Lord which is awesome, but it is still a worry. they are headed north to Edmonton to tell their family. Please pray the Lord give them strength to do so.
I also thought that I should tell my H. Although it is my friend Paul and his wife that told me about the PA of my WH. He has been very bitter against Paul, but I know that once his heart is softened (and the Lord has shown me that it is being softened) that he will lose the bitterness.
I am thinking of writing my H a letter to tell him about Paul. What do you think?
Please pray for the right words to come...
Thanks,
Love in Christ, SW

Please pray for me and my eight children, their dad walked out on us on March 3 and some days I feel I can't do it but with GOD's help I know I can. My children are heartbroken and devastated they love and adore their dad, this is so out of character for him. Satan has a hold over him please pray that he seeks help with his addiction so that he can have a relationship with his children in the future.

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by mommax8:
Please pray for me and my eight children, their dad walked out on us on March 3 and some days I feel I can't do it but with GOD's help I know I can. My children are heartbroken and devastated they love and adore their dad, this is so out of character for him. Satan has a hold over him please pray that he seeks help with his addiction so that he can have a relationship with his children in the future.<hr /></blockquote>MommaX8:

I am only a momma of 2, but like you my H has abandoned the kids and I so he can follow his sex addiction and run away from himself. Of course you and I know that no matter where he goes, there he'll be!

In the meantime, I really and truly know the devastation and hurt that this brings to the kids. Mine feel like how can their dad love them if he can just leave them like that? The fight it and they struggle and it is SO hard to see.

You will be in my prayers big time. For the next few days, eat soup (it's warm and it's liquid enough to get around the lump in your throat) and buy LOTION TISSUES! If you use regular tissues and cry a lot (like I did) you will rugburn your eyes and nose and then cry salty tears into the rugburn! OUCH! Get some lotion tissues--it will do two things for you: 1)you won't rugburn your eyes and 2)you will get out of the house and start to live life again a very little bit.

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{MommaX8}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

Cyberhugs all day long to you!

CJ

MommaX8. You are in my prayers!
I'm so ticked with these guys that don't see the hurt they cause, I realize it's satan, so I guess I should be mad at him instead. I just get so distraught over the mess people get themselves into, leaving there spouse and kids to fend for themselves.
I know my advise to all others is the same as I will give you. Keep your eyes upon Jesus, and let Him guide you through this time.
Do you have a church family that could help you out? I hope and pray that many will help you where your at. God Bless you and know that we are all praying for you.
Love in Christ, SW

mommyx8.....I am praying for you too.

Isn't this so cool. I have been wondering the last few days if my situation is different from anyone elses and can my marriage be put back together. I just thought since I was the WS at one time, and now I am divorced and now my wife is dating, can my marriage be saved. I got these two praise reports in my rejoice ministries e-mail today. I know God is going to do it and he just showed me again that he can.

<blockquote>quote:<hr /> "I was the prodigal just one year ago when my husband gave me a few of
your messages he had printed off his computer. At the time I read
them, cried a little and put them away. Unfortunately my husband gave
up his stand, but shortly after, God yanked a knot in me. I repented
with Godly sorrow and soon found those messages tucked away. I needed
them because my husband had become the prodigal. I am happy to report
that my husband is home and I am continuing to stand for his return to
his salvation and for our marriage to be restored better than ever
before. Sunday, God gave me a beautiful gift. My husband and I, along
with our three children and his parents, attended our church together
for the first time in a long time. My husband even expressed that he
had a great day. God has a terrific plan in store for my family."
(Illinois)
<hr /></blockquote>I sked my wife to come back to church last nite. How I will rejoice when this day comes.

<blockquote>quote:<hr /> "After praying and asking God whether I should relocate to the town I
will be attending school at, I received my answer in March 12 Charlyne
Cares, ‘Knowing and Doing the Will of God;' ‘You should not move.' It
is amazing the ways that God uses to answer prayer. I have started
going to Friday night bible meetings. There is a living, breathing
example there of a restored couple who after divorce, another person
and much conviction the wife returned to her husband. They remarried
and have had three additional children together. Praise the Lord."
(Kansas)
<hr /></blockquote>This just showed me that even though I am divorced and my situation seems impossible that God will restore my marriage.

I have two praise reports. My house finally sold. It is sad tthough because our family really liked the house but we needed to sell it for many reasons. It was great timing on Gods part for many reasons.

When the inspector looked at the house he said we had a crack in our heat and air unit and it was going to be expensive to fix. I had a heat and air guy come out and look at it and after much praying he told me it was OK.

Love in Christ
cajunky

[ March 15, 2003, 12:38 AM: Message edited by: cajunky ]

CJ,

<blockquote>quote:<hr /> Thank You for holding our hair while we puke when we pray for them. <hr /></blockquote>I couldn't have said it more elegantly !!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

D.

Cajunky - if I wanted to ask you a question about church, and my wayward spouse, could I ask you somewhere else. Wayward spouse reads here, and I don't want him to read what I have to say. He once was SNL, he reads here, and I feel he is still here.

I know what you are going through. I found a great church, am trying to get my kids to go, 17-24 4kids. I love church, always have, my husband (SNL) wasn't one to go to church regularly. He met me, and I was with the Navigators. I enjoy church, the fellowship, the reading of the bible, and the new church I am in the sermons are strong and not boring. This preacher is a strong christian man, a has a strong christian wife, with 5 beautiful children.

I have stated to SNL he is welcome, but he tells me he doesn't need church. He doesn't need all the music. He doesn't need the fellowship. That is his loss, not mine. But I would like to get my kids to come, I feel once they get started in this church, they will find it real refreshing.

Anyways, just wanting to ask you a ?.

Faith4me......Give me your e-mail address and I will be glad to answer your question. If your husband thinks he doesn't need church he really needs to rethink who put him here and who controls his life and who can really make him happy.

Love in Christ
cajunky

Cajunky, thanks, am getting ready for church. Enjoying the sunshine, it is melting all the snow we had this year. My e-mail is 'Tazziblack@hotmail.com' - thanks.

For this week's prayer for WH's:
From Stormie Omartin's book, Power of a Praying Wife"
<blockquote>quote:<hr />
[QB]

HIS EMOTIONS:
Anger and depression are but two fo the many negative emotions that can torment a man's soul. Often they are only an habitual way of thinking that has been given place over time. Men tend to believe it's part of their character that can't be altered, but these patterns can be broken. Don't stand by and watch your H be manipulated by his emotions. Freedom may be just a prayer away.
[QB]<hr /></blockquote>
LORD,
You have said in Your Word that You redeem our souls when we put our trust in You (Psalm 34:22). I pray that (H's name) would have faith in You to redeem his soul from negative emotions. May he never be controlled by depression, anger, anxiety, jealousy, hopelessness, fear, or suicidal thoughts. Specifically I pray about (area of concern). Deliver him from this and all other controlling emotions (Psalm 40:17). I know that only YOu can deliver and heal, but use me as Your instrument of restoration. Help me not to be pulled down with him when he struggles. Enable me instead to understand and have words to say that will bring life.

Free him to share those deepest feelings with me and others who can help. Liberate him to cry when he needs to and not bottle his emotions inside. At the same time, give him the gift of laughter and ability to find humor in all circumstances and trust in you, regardless of how he is feeling. Anoint him with "the oil of joy" (Isaiah 61:3), refresh him with Your Spirit and set him free from negative emotions this day.

SCRIPTURES:
Proverbs 28:26
Psalm 33:18,19
Psalm 40:1-3

<blockquote>quote:<hr /> --------------------------------------------------------------------------------
posted March 13, 2003 02:27 PM
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
VERY INTERESTING WH Just called me about someone that may buy the business!!!!!An employee wanted to buy it, but it fell thru so we thought we were going to have to liquidate it. We owe a GREAT deal of money on this disaster.

WH said that the guy that is interested is a real "strong born again Christian." This all has happened in the last 2 days ! The Christian man told WH that the Lord was watching over him. And it was the Lord that brought him to WH. WH replied that he didn't know but whatever works.

As soon as I heard the part about the 2 days and that the man was a strong Christian and God had sent him, Chills went down my spine because ...... 2 days ago I was in touch with Broken Stone Ministries - Our Fathers Arms who help alcholics / addicts and he started to pray for WH. WOW God is Good. The man (From the Ministry) is an X-addict himself and I had such a good feeling when I met him this past weekend. It was no accident that God brought us together.

God Bless,

D.

<hr /></blockquote>Here's an update WH just called and it looks like it is a go to sell the business !!!!! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" /> I talked to the man who will be buying it and he said he had been praying for something like this. This man said he puts God 1st, his family 2nd and everything else after that.

After he got off the phone with me, he asked WH if I had been praying for this & I told WH that I would tell the man the story in the near future.

This has all happened so fast, and just when I was ready to let go completely.

I need continued prayers WH is sounding a better, however we have just been dealing with business issues. My heart is hardened towards WH.

I need prayers of wisdom, guidance,and strength

Blessings,

D.

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by lupolady:
... Anger and depression are but two of the many ... emotions that can torment a ... soul. Often they are only an habitual way of thinking that has been given place over time. <hr /></blockquote>Have you ever had the feeling God is tapping you on the shoulder with a message?? Well, I've been seeing messages all over about controlling emotions and being the master of my emotions and so I either better LISTEN or God will bonk me on the head with a fry pan. I know Him--that's how He does it with me! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

"OKAY, GOD, I'M LISTENING. YOU DON'T NEED TO HIT ME ON THE HEAD WITH THE FRY PAN THIS TIME. I KNOW IT'S PROGRESS BECAUSE YOU USED TO HAVE TO BONK ME AND NOW I KNOW TO LISTEN BEFORE THE BONK! THANK YOU FOR YOUR MESSAGE...SO WHAT IS IT??"

I saw a very interesting post recently about the tale of the two wolves: joy and anger. Do you know which wolf will rule in your heart?? The one you feed.

Then I saw this part of the prayer:
 <blockquote>quote:<hr /> ... I pray that (insert name here) would have faith in You to redeem their soul from negative emotions. May s/he never be controlled by depression, anger, anxiety, jealousy, hopelessness, fear, or suicidal thoughts. <hr /></blockquote>Now, I'm not trying to be selfish here, but do you know what message I see? "I pray that CJ would have faith in You to redeem her soul from her emotions. May she never be controlled by her emotions, be they sorrow, anger, jealousy, hopelessness, or fear -OR- excessive joy, unbridled happiness, trusting someone too quickly, hoping where there is not reason to, or boldly going where no man should go!"

Oh yes, folks, I am an emotional sea with waves of feelings rolling over me all the time. Sometimes they are gentle, soothing waves, and sometimes it's more like a tidal wave! Sorrow is diminishing, anger is mellowing, jealousy is still a struggle, hopelessess usually sneaks in when I'm not looking to God, and fear--OY--fear usually comes when I have $100 in the bank and the refrigerator just died! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Big Grin]" src="images/icons/grin.gif" />

Yet, we tend to think of the positive emotions as "good" and at least *I* tend to forget that even extremes of the positive emotions can be out of line with God. Like excessive joy and celebrating--taking the credit when God is the one who did the work! Or unbridled happiness and giddiness and school-girlishness which is unbecoming of a 40yo mother of two (okay--a little is nice, but a lot can be immature). Or trusting someone too quickly--I am FAMOUS for this (I get the Lifetime Achievement Award in the Trusting Too Soon Hall of Fame). Yes, I believe in trusting people, but it is WISDOM to trust them after they have shown themselves trustworthy. Gee, CJ, learn to wait! Same for hoping where there is not reason to hope--that's just Cinderella, pie-in-the-sky dreaming, not rooted, godly behavior. And finally there's boldly going where no man (or woman) should go (aka fearlessness). Yes, believe it or not, fear is not ALL bad. It can sneak in when it's inappropriate and stop you from trusting in God. But it can also stop you from jumping out of an airplane without a parachute!

Finally:

<blockquote>quote:<hr /> Free (her) to share those deepest feelings with ... others who can help. Liberate (her)to ... not bottle (her) emotions inside. At the same time, give (her) the gift of laughter and ability to find humor in all circumstances and trust in you, regardless of how (she) is feeling. <hr /></blockquote>Okay--I'd say the message there is that I need to share my feelings with others. Sometimes (believe it or not) that is hard for me to do, because it involves vulnerability and I hate being vulnerable. It's easier to keep them inside (good or bad) and deal with them myself then to try to open up and let others see.

And you know what?? How can I not laugh when I have a God who holds my hair as I puke when I pray for my OW (plural) and who bonks me on the head with a fry pan if I don't stop to listen?? He's FUNNY!! The pladipus proves that!!

CJ

[ March 16, 2003, 10:37 PM: Message edited by: FaithfulWife ]

From "Experiencing God Day by Day" by Henry Blackaby.

RETURN TO GOD

Zechariah 1:3 Thus says the Lord of hosts: "Return to Me," says the Lord of host, "and I will return to you."

<blockquote>quote:<hr /> God places much of the burden of what will become on our response to Him. If we have drifted from God, His call is to return to Him. God promises that if we will return, He will immediately renew His relationship with us. James 4:8 promises that if we draw near to God, He will draw near to us. Mattew 7:7 guarantees that if we seek Christ, we will find Him. Much of the Christian life rests upon our response and our desire to experience God to the fullest.

Why is it some Christians seem to go so much deeper in their walk with God than others? Why have some had such powerful intercessory prayer ministries that have changed the courses of nations? Why has God chosen to anoint the words of some so that, when they speak or pray or preach, it is obvious that their words are consecrated by God? It is because these individuals have committed themselves to pursue God until His presence is powerful real in their lives. They have decided to settle for nothing less than vibrant relationship with God, and He has honored their desire.

Have you become complacent with your relationship with God, or are you hungering for more? Don't become satisfied with a relationship with God that is broken by sin and void of the power of the Holy Spirit. You have just as much of God's powerful presence available to you as the greatest saint in Christian history! Return to God. There is so much more in store for you if you will return to Him. He awaits your response. <hr /></blockquote>Remember to pray for your marriage as well as everyone elses.

Love in Christ
cajunky

[ March 17, 2003, 02:39 AM: Message edited by: cajunky ]

Very little of it is true. I'm not first string and she hasn't really closed the door in OM. I found out this weekend.

I feel like I'm back at square one 16 months ago. 16 months down the tubes. I have to start all over again. She still loves him. But if I force NC she'll resent it for a long time.

I felt so alone this weekend. I don't know what's the true any more. I can't trust it when she tells me she loves me, but she continues to say it. Hearing her say it hurt. I don't know if she stroked my hair and head last night because she might just love me or because she feels sorry for me.

I feel like God has schooled me enough for now. I'm tired of learning. I want Him to school her and OM for a while. I'm tired of hurting. They have lost nothing. I'm starting to think I'm losing my dignity. But I really think God wants me to hold on to this marriage. Is this really God's plan? I never thought that God's plans ever went back to square one. That it was a process and it only looks like it goes backward sometimes. But right now I having trouble believing that.

I've never asked for meds from my doctor before, but now I think it might be time.

This is going to be a tough week. Pray for me/us.

Thanks.

S&C

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by steadfast and committed:
 I never thought that God's plans ever went back to square one. <hr /></blockquote>ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?!?!?!?

Don't you remember that the Israelites went around the same, stupid mountain for 40 YEARS?!?!?!

What should have been an 11-day trip?!?!?!?!

Talk about going around "square one" again and again! <img border="0" title="" alt="[Wink]" src="images/icons/wink.gif" />

It's all about the journey. God wants the JOURNEY to be the most important thing. Ask Him what He is still trying to teach you. That's most likely what is holding "things" up. Something more for you to learn. You ain't there, yet, I guess.

Like many of us. Hang in there, S&C

Wwwwaaaappp! The virtual 2x4 connects with S&C's head as he closes his daily reading and finishes Deuteronomy Chapter 34.

OK, so it's staring me right in front of the face and has been for the last few weeks. So where the heck have I been whilst the wondering has occured? Maybe focused on the wrong thing?

Well that's why I post here. God uses you in tremendous ways.

Then again, maybe he's telling me that I'm at a point where Plan-B will be effective and it's my W that is done wandering and is ready to cross back over when faced with the decision. I don't know. We'll see.

Lots for me to pray about. Just need to make sure God goes before me. Lupo, thanks for helping me up. I'm still tired of all of this, but at least I'm still on my feet (or is Christ carrying me now?). Thanks again.

Love in Christ

S&C

<blockquote>quote:<hr />Originally posted by steadfast and committed:
 I feel like God has schooled me enough for now. I'm tired of learning. I want Him to school her and OM for a while. I'm tired of hurting. <hr /></blockquote>Oh, S&C, I am so sorry to hear that she is still in contact with the OM. For now, I will not even DISCUSS that, because I have a gentle word for you.

First, do you see the ONE pair of footprints in the sand? He's carrying you now.

Second, I sooooo identify with what you wrote above. It's been 3 years since my H strayed and I can distinctly remember one night feeling EXACTLY as you feel: defeated, tired, exhausted, stretched beyond your endurance... It's funny because I remember praying to God that night and telling Him, "I just can't do this anymore! I'm human and I can not do this!! My heart is dead and I don't even WANT to do this anymore. I'm tired of being patient. I have learned patience and longsuffering and all the rest of it. I don't need anymore lessons!"

Then God bonked me on the head with a fry pan. "I don't want YOU to do it anymore. You are getting in MY way. I wish you would let ME take over and give him to ME. Furthermore, you are right. You do not need anymore lessons in patience, but how presumptuous of you to assume that the lesson is FOR YOU! You are no longer just an individual--you have become ONE with your spouse and your spouse is the one who needs the lesson! Shame on you--you need to be quiet and wait until your spouse learns HIS lesson. Boy, you're really something thinking that the only person I would teach a lesson to is you. You are being patient for HIM not for you!!!"

Uhhhh...well I felt about an inch tall. Okay, I am only an inch tall, but that's another story (heehee). <img border="0" title="" alt="[Razz]" src="images/icons/tongue.gif" />

You know, those Israelites wandered around for 40 years because when they came out of Egypt, they went and spied on the inhabitants of the land, and 10 of the 12 guys came back and said, "Oh...I don't know...they're awfully big..." Only two guys (Joshua and Caleb) came back and said, "God told us He would be with us and we would defeat them--we trust in God--let's GO!" Joshua and Caleb wandered around with all those people as they all died, but guess what? They LIVED to not only get into the land of Israel, they LEAD THE PEOPLE IN THERE!

Don't you think they had reasonable reasons to complain during those 40 years?? "Oh God, COME ON! We trusted in you--do we HAVE to wander around too?? Couldn't we just sit here at the base of the mountain and watch those untrusting people wander around? I'm tired of dragging my stuff all over because they didn't believe in you. Hey...weren't we just here a year or two ago? GREAT--we're lost! God, we are sick and tired of these lessons and I'm sorry but I think we get patience now. HEY--why do WE have to have to wander around for 40 years! Are you punishing us or what?? It's been 30 years now...isn't that ENOUGH??? How long do you expect me to wait?"

Heehee.

I think you can see what I'm saying here.

Your true and faithful friend,

CJ

Just reading everyone's posts is SO encouraging!! I thank everyone who fasts and prays on Wednesdays, because the prayer support is so important and doing so much!!

I feel God's presence every day and it is a privilege!! He has helped me hold on when I couldn't hold on any longer!! Financially, I am having a REAL struggle right now, no support, even temp support, and although he is paying the mortgage and a couple of credit card payments, that is all. The tuition at my D's school, a private Christian school is almost two months past due and I can't manage it. They have been very good and supportive of both my D and myself and I do not want to not pay them. Please pray that I can continue to meet as many obligations as possible while awaiting a support order decision! Thank you all!!

Things are so bad right now that I cannot bear to post about them at the moment. My last shred of dignity is gone. Please pray for me.

Andy

(((((((((((((((ANDY)))))))))))))))) & prayers

D.

Just an update, I put a friend of my parents in prayer at church. And this weekend my mother got a call from these friends, (my father is no longer with us here on earth), and the friend was diagnosed from a hospital here with esophagus cancer. They go south for the winter, and in Florida they did surgery and removed the tumor, and it was benign. This man is older, 89 going to be 90 this June. Praise the Lord.

I told my pastor, cause I have him and another friend of mine her husband has cancer of the brain. And my pastor, just shouted with joy, and hugged me and said, see God works in mysterious ways.

Praise the Lord everyone.

Then my mother just called tonight, and another friend of my parents, the wife called. And told her that her husband, has colon cancer. It is progressive, and he is to go into the hospital for treatment this Friday. They just found out about his cancer. So the wife is asking my mom about how my dad died, and the effects of treatment on my dad, and my fathers sudden differences in taste, moods, and illusions.

At least my mother can be of help to her, and help this woman get through the tough stages of her terminally ill husband.

please pray for me, I'm getting very discouraged. I've been praying and I know it hasn't been long since I've made up my mind to be committed to waiting, but it has already been so long since this nightmare started. Also pray for my H. he has been more loving and kid to me but is upset about something I really don't have control over and something that was mainly his fault for opening a can of worms, but he is upset with me because I don't seem to care. So he is punishing me by not talking to me and being very formal. And I had thought we were getting along a lot better. I know satan is trying his hardest to cloud his mind, even tho he doesn't believe in any of that! but it is so hard not to take things oersonally and get hurt. Please pray I will be strong and loving towards him, so he can see I have changed. I know God has already answered prayer and things are changing. I just want it now! Just like all of us I guess. Thank you for this site and all the people who are praying for their marriages and not giving up. It seems like it's so easy for people to tell you to give up and get a life, Well my life is with my Husband and I don't want to give up.

St. Patrick's Day is my MIL's B'day. My WH showed up with a gift. The last time he saw or spoke to his parents was sometime last summer, demanding money and when they refused, he walked out calling them names. He showed up apparently looking worse than ever. According to a family friend, he was drunk, fatter than she'd ever seen him, and looking "crazy" (she's known him since infancy and he didn't even speak to her when he saw her).

Once again, he was verbally abusive, especially to his father, but also to his sister who comes over daily to care for her parents (My MIL has Alzheimer's disease, which has progressed in my WH's absence so that she barely remembers what she said the moment she's said it and my FIL is not doing much better). My WH was making wild accusations about me, too.

Here's why I'm writing. My H is drunk, high, still living with the OW and her daughter (and sometimes her husband as well from what I hear), he's abusive to everyone who cares about him (including OW) and has driven away almost everyone his family and most of his friends. So, why am I here on this marriage restoration thread?

Why I still loved him for so long, despite how horribly he treated me, is a mystery to me, but I've ever so gradually fallen out of love with him. Today, after hearing how abusively he treated his family on his mother's birthday, I had somewhat of an epiphany and realized that for the first time I can actually say that I no longer love him. I don't hate him either. I feel sorry for him, but mostly I just feel nothing for him.

I'm not divorced and I took my marital commitment very seriously. That's why I've hung on, using no contact in the MB way to preserve whatever love I had left, but also to gradually detach in case divorce became inevitable.

Although my H left with the OW, he's never made any move toward getting a divorce. I filed, I hired a forensic accountant to evalluate our business, I obtained all the property appraisals, I'm the one keeping the business going, I'm sending him money every two weeks and paying his rent, etc. My H seems satisfied as long as he gets his check every two weeks, even though he's told everyone that I've sold all his belongings and I'm forcing him to live in shelters. I haven't seen or spoken to him in almost a year.

To be honest, part of the reason I haven't pursued divorce more agressively is purely selfish and monetary. I live in our "dream house" and I'll have to sell it to pay him off for his half of our business. The house is beautiful and it's on a large piece of property with a dramatic view of the mountains. We have horses and the property backs up on access to trails that go forever. It's also less than a mile from our business.

I actually feel relief that after years of unfaithfulness, lies, substance abuse, verbal and emotional abuse, 2 years and 4 months after he moved out, 2 years after he moved back home, then kicked me AND THE KIDS out and moved the OW in the next day, almost 1 year after promising on our tenth anniversary that he would get sober and come home, I am finally able to move on.

Is that wrong? Is restoration of marriage always the best answer? Even if it's the best answer, is it the only answer if the WS isn't interested? Can't I turn my relationship over to God and go on with my life? How do I know where God is leading me? I know that God can work miracles, but am I supposed to live my life based on the expectation of miracles? Maybe the "miracle" God has in store for me is something other than restoration of marriage with a man who has beaten me down emotionally and spiritually for 20 years.

I was having very bad financial troubles, then I went to this site, http://www.virtualrosary.org/index.php , and I put my intentions for a new Catholic Wife (my ex wife is Catholic, and if she comes back, SHE would be my NEW wife!) and for help with my
finances. Last night my exwife offered to loan me the money I need and then this morning I opened a letter from my mortgage company and find a check for an overage on my escrow account! I will be able to catch up with this check!!!!!!!!!

GOD HAS ANSWERED MY PRAYER!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you all here, especially cajunky, for your prayers, past, present and future.

God Bless You,
Andy

[ March 19, 2003, 07:33 AM: Message edited by: Not My Will, But Thy Will Be Done ]

Hey guys.....I have had my children this week so I have been having a blast with them so I haven't been able to respond to anyone this week. I will try and do it tonite. This is really the first time I have sat in front of the puter this week and it is only for a few minutes. I am praying for all of you ,especially you S & C this week. There were some great responses to your situation that kind of hit me in the head too.

See you tonite...... <img border="0" title="" alt="[Smile]" src="images/icons/smile.gif" />

Love in Christ
cajunky

HI Letstry,
One of the most beautiful traits of God is that He is so awesome at changing people.
Leaving your WH in His hands will do marvelous things. Although you don't love him anymore, God will give you the love you need when the time is right. Giving yourself and your WH over to the Lord is the best thing you can do, Let Him do the work in both of you that is needed. It is amazing when we "let go and let God" the results that can happen. God is faithful, and if you are faithful in standing for your marriage, no matter how bad the situation has been in the past and looks now, God is the worker of miracles! When the time is His, God can restore your marriage with a brand new man in your now WH. And He is apt to change you as well, if you let Him.
He has done some marvelous things in my own life, and I so look forward to who He wants me to be, and the man He is preparing my husband to be.
God will be glorified when the restoration comes, we will both be totally new people, compared to who we were when we married!
If you have never checked this site out, web page[/URL] Rejoice Ministries
give it a try, it is very encouraging!
In the mean time, keep looking to the one who loves you and your WH more than you could even imagine! God Bless keep you strong!
Love in Christ, SW